Do I Have A Right To Be Mad?

Well men get into relationships and try to reason with women the way they would with men. But women don't think like men, so you need a different approach. Imo anyway. Although I do understand why guys get frustrated.
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The weirdest part is, when I do dominate her, she genuinely tells me that it drives her wild, and it's the best sex we've ever had (I agree). I can tell she's not lying. She's beg for me to give her a facial.

But when I suggest any form of sex now, she's "too tired". Only on her infrequent schedule. Absolutely no domination, even though she says she wants it.

That's part of the problem. Don't ask, take. If she wants you to stop, she'll stop you. You may have let this situation go on for too long now. You may have to play the dread game and distance yourself a bit. Instead of hanging out with her - go to the gym, grab a bite to eat with some buddies, hit up a movie. She's not giving you want you want, so why give her what she wants. You already said you wouldn't dump her over this so what motivation does she have to do better. The single biggest asset a man has in a relationship is the ability to walk away. Sometimes you have to tease it, sometimes you have to use it.

So far you've told us that she doesn't care about your sexual fulfillment and she doesn't keep her word. Is that really wife material - as is? Require more and she'll either rise to your expectations or she'll kick rocks but you'll be happier either way in the long run.
 
That's part of the problem. Don't ask, take. If she wants you to stop, she'll stop you. You may have let this situation go on for too long now. You may have to play the dread game and distance yourself a bit. Instead of hanging out with her - go to the gym, grab a bite to eat with some buddies, hit up a movie. She's not giving you want you want, so why give her what she wants. You already said you wouldn't dump her over this so what motivation does she have to do better. The single biggest asset a man has in a relationship is the ability to walk away. Sometimes you have to tease it, sometimes you have to use it.

So far you've told us that she doesn't care about your sexual fulfillment and she doesn't keep her word. Is that really wife material - as is? Require more and she'll either rise to your expectations or she'll kick rocks but you'll be happier either way in the long run.
I've tried to just take. She either loves it, or pushes me off. She told me she fears me leaving her for a girl with a higher sex drive, so the fear is there. Changes nothing.
 
When she promised it, yeah, I think it's reasonable to expect it.

Women promise to do something later to get out of doing something at the current time then hope you'll forget. You need to have a talk but it probably won't do any good. If she doesn't enjoy the same things you do, it's time to cut bait.
 
It's reasonable to expect it. It's not reasonable to get upset when she changes her mind. People can do that. Get over it.

Women do it about every 10 minutes.
 
Been with girlfriend two years. Birthday was yesterday. A couple weeks ago, she took a raincheck on a blowjob (very common occurrence), and promised to give me one, even with facial (only two since I've been with her, even though I love it) ibn my birthday. Was looking forward to it for two weeks, and, while she offered sex last night, she made up some bullshit excuse, and no blowjob. Raincheck again.

She got upset when I got mad. I don't think I'm being spoiled or entitled, especially when she almost never does oral anyways. Not even once per month.

I just want to experience the most awesome feeling ever. I thought on my birthday, she could at least do me that solid, even if she didn't particularly feel like it. Do I have a right to be angry?

you're not doing something right. she's not as into you as you think she is. chicks don't just all of a sudden stop doing that, unless they're not into you anymore. just my personal opinion. obviously i don't know you. every chick i've been with was down for that lol. even had one girlfriend who would give me head while i was driving.
 
you're not doing something right. she's not as into you as you think she is. chicks don't just all of a sudden stop doing that, unless they're not into you anymore. just my personal opinion. obviously i don't know you. every chick i've been with was down for that lol. even had one girlfriend who would give me head while i was driving.
Promised that too. Got me up, but never did it.
 
Promised that too. Got me up, but never did it.

honestly, begging for it is probably turning her off. usually bj's are kind of like a spontaneous, spur-of-the-moment kinds of things. unless you're doing porn lol.
 
Yeah this is a part of female logic I never understand. Some girls cut down onthe sex because they're just not that into having sex all the time, or into the same things you are. Some cut back because something you're saying or doing is making them less attracted to you, or you're not doing the type of things they're into. Or because they're banging someone else. But it's all so cryptic. Unless you play Columbo, you'll rarely know why.


Most girls I've known guilt trip the guy over wanting sex, but wtf we're guys. We will always, always want sex. Some effort should be made to meet halfway if you're into the relationship. I've had sex when I didn't want to, or done things they're into that I'm not. Because in my mind it's my job as their partner to try to please them sexually, especially if you expect monogamy. Don't go get this anywhere else, but I don't want to do it!



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I am a girl and I've seen the issue both ways. Girls are more likely to deny sex altogether and act like its nothing. Guys are more likely to act like their needs are paramount but not effectively communicate or up their game to incentivize a compromise on the lady's end.

I wouldn't make someone my partner if I wasn't interested in being with them sexually and exclusively. However, there are issues on both ends.
 
I am a girl and I've seen the issue both ways. Girls are more likely to deny sex altogether and act like its nothing. Guys are more likely to act like their needs are paramount but not effectively communicate or up their game to incentivize a compromise on the lady's end.

I wouldn't make someone my partner if I wasn't interested in being with them sexually and exclusively. However, there are issues on both ends.
I feel like my game is good. I could take her out to a nice dinner, give her a great back rub, kiss her passionately, do excellent dirty talk, and eat her out to orgasm, but she'd give me maybe a minute of oral before wanting sex.
 
It seems to me that she's made it perfectly clear that she's not into oral, and by the way he complains about it, I'm sure he's complained about it plenty to her. So, perhaps she made a "promise" to get him off her back about a sexual act she wasn't interested in, because all of her protests have gone practically unheard.

Then why promise it? If she made it perfectly clear then he would have no soapbox to cry on.

I get the pressure argument. But you're in a consensual relationship with a man that you aren't married to. Tell him to go to hell if you hate sucking dick that much. You're a grown woman and as much as he has a responsibility to not be a creeper and pressure her...she has a responsibility to put her foot down and be clear and concise. Its what adults do. Women included.
 
is PCPenis a thing?
 
I feel like my game is good. I could take her out to a nice dinner, give her a great back rub, kiss her passionately, do excellent dirty talk, and eat her out to orgasm, but she'd give me maybe a minute of oral before wanting sex.

I'm not saying that's necessarily your problem. I'm more commenting on the topic as a whole. There are serious issues on both sides. Thats all I was getting at. I can't speak to your skills with your woman.
 
Your dick must be too big so it hurts her mouth. That's what I tell myself whenever the wife denies me oral...
 
The only thing I've seen work in this situation is when the guy is up front from the start. I expect this frequency of sex, this many bjs (or whatever you're into) or I'll go get it somewhere else.


I've never, ever seen the passive aggressive whining approach most guys take work out. Not that I'm trying to roast the guy, whining or sulking about it was my approach when I was younger too. But it doesn't work, if anything they lose respect for you and you get even less sex.


Edit: Also while what @Smashandgrab said sounds sorta rapey, it's 100% true. A Lot of girls aren't turned on at all by you asking them to do what you want. They want you to just initiate it. Obviously if you try to initiate and she says no, then abort mission. But a lot of girls expect you to take the initiative. I've had a couple relationships where I didn't feel like I was getting enough sex, and there response was "well you always just ask, sometimes I want you to just take it"

My response was:

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But a lot of women are into that 50 shades type bullshit

Yep and I've always been up front about how much sex I want which is basically daily. Unless it's been a long day or something like that.
 
Would you be cool with her shitting on your face on her B-day if she is really looking forward to it?
Bad comparison. And no, because I'd never promise that. We've both agreed that's a no go zone.
 
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