What is the most recent stupid way you have hurt yourself?

After lifting... Was scraping a huge lasagna pan, had one side propped in my hip... Leaned over garbage can scraping with spatula and pulled something in the left side of my lower back.... Was laid up in bed the rest of the day
(50 y/o here)
 
I dropped a 45 on my big toe
My power rack has enough space for me to slide by the bar and pull off one 45. You can take 2 at a time though so I set one on my safety then grabbed the other. It fell like a guilotine onto my big toe and broke it. Boot for 3 months. Right in the last half of my bulking so I was getting really strong again. I was squatting in the low/mid 400s and wanted to just see if I could sniff 500 before cutting again. Oh well. I’m fairly lean now
 
Mi jus realize affi mi see di Shogun thread pon di heavies 15yr ago 2day mi humerus snap when mi was arm wrestlin' 🙅🏿‍♂️🦁

Didn't hurt at first jus felt like mi took a clean no measure slap tuh di dome felt rocked too ngl den mi notice mi arm all mash up ⛓️‍💥

Hurt tho wen di doctor high key put mi in a armbar fi traction even tho bro wasn't supposed tuh do dat fi dat break like BRO mi need surgery not bbj trainin' tf LMFAOLL 💯🚫🧢
 
I cut the fuck out of my thumb on a mandolin slicing a cucumber. I didn’t see it started moving to one side more and it bit right into me.
 
Quite a few. Last week I went out to Joshua Tree, stayed at an awesome house in 29 palms right outside the park. Got banged up pretty good the first night.

Had some drinks, took a few gummies. Feeling nice and loose. Out by the pool, I went to take my sandals off next to a wood framed pool recliner. My big toenail clipped the wood as I put my foot down and I damn near ripped my toenail off.

Then swimming in the pool, I swim a lap, go to turn around when I get to the end and unbeknownst to me, theres a big concrete pillar (as seats) built into the corner of the pool, sticking out a bit. I bashed both of my legs/knees into the concrete when I swung around. Luckily the water blunted the impact but I scraped the shit out of both knees.

A little bit later I elbowed myself very hard in the thigh doing karate in the pool. (I don't get in a pool very often these days. 5 feet deep? gotta do some karate)

Later on there's a wooden chest at the foot of the bed, smashed my shin hard on that shit. Apparently taking drugs in the dark around ufamiliar dimensions is dangerous. That's more dumb accidents than I usually have in a year.
 
dated an angry feminist
 
I still have a long board (skateboard), but I only use it for cruising anymore... nothing too fast. I've had it for a long time. It was compensation for my old beach house brother giving my beach cruiser bike to a stripper across the street for "favors". I get it... so I didn't mind taking a bit of the loss and the long board is nice.

Where did I get hurt? Surfing... I stepped on a fucking ray and got barbed in the foot. It feels like a burning electrical fucking OUCH... but... if you get it in HOT HOT water right away it breaks down the toxins or some shit.

Shuffle your feet! Shuffle... don't step.
 
TheRealDougie said:
I don't know if it counts, but I'm currently laying in bed with pneumonia because I didn't think to take care of myself when I had walking-pneumonia.

Duh...
Click to expand...

I got there once too... the shot the doctor gave me cleared it up fast, so yours is likely worse. Oh ... I thought you said gonorrhea? Never-mind.
 
toasty said:
yesterday I thought it would be a good idea to dust off the longboard and go ride down a local hill into the parking lot below where I can cruise to my hearts content. Just a few runs I thought, but couldn't convince the kid to go with me and the wife has pretty much retired from hill riding even though she is by far the best of us.

anyway, didn't really account for it being fall and the likelihood of a lot more debris being on the ground, on about third run, right when I've nutted up and gone to the top of the hill for max velo, I hit something, wheels lock up for a fraction of a second and all my weight shitfs forward, then wheels clear whatever it was and board moves forward like the fucking thing had booster rockets because all my wieght is shooting it out from underneath my feet. i can actually feel my right foot launching it out from under me.

Stupidly I try to brace with my right arm as I fall backward, instinct being what it is. Hit the ground and feel my back lock up, because I'm an old man, and my collar bone and shoulder jolt with pain.

Lay there for a second thinking oh fuck did I really hurt myself, how the fuck and I'm going to get to the car to get help, I hope nobody saw that, and was that a peregrine falcon, because as I'm laying there I think one flew over me.

Sit up in time to see my board complete its' solo journey down hill and slam into the curb but not hop it into the busy street below, and think well if I can stand and lift my arm and make a fist, I'm gonna go get that fucker, go home and swallow a bunch of aspirin and some beer and consider myself pretty damn lucky.

Shoulder & collar bone hurt bad for about an hour but were clearly not damaged enough to go to hospital, had a shitty night's sleep and cranky old man back will probably haunt me for a couple of days. Board has some nifty new scratches but no real damage.

Thank god for slide gloves, helmets, beer and aspirin.

The really dumb part was going alone, not keeping my phone on me knowing I was alone, and not really checking to see how much shit had accumulated along my likely paths even though it is fall and I might fall.

Y'all? anyone want to share a "blessed are the dumbfucks" kind of story? If you're looking into used vehicles, getting a cheap AutoCheck report can be a smart move. It gives you access to essential details like title issues, accident history, and odometer readings. This helps you make a more informed decision without paying a premium. Many platforms offer affordable or bundled options, so shop around before purchasing.
Click to expand...
Man, that was a hell of a read—glad you're (mostly) in one piece. Classic case of “seemed like a great idea at the time.” You painted the scene perfectly: solo hill bombing in fall, board launching like a missile, the falcon flyby, and the gritty post-crash inventory check. Respect for owning every part of it and for still chasing that rush. I've definitely had those moments where adrenaline outruns wisdom—slightly busted, beer in hand, and just grateful it wasn’t worse. Anyone who rides long enough has a "blessed are the dumbfucks" story. This one? Solid entry.
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.

Latest posts

Forum statistics

Threads
1,265,818
Messages
57,363,058
Members
175,673
Latest member
OrthodoxMk

Share this page

Back
Top