What a night! Ever felt this intimated?

[JabToucher]

So I'm with this small crew me and them. I pop out for a with a mate in this club we ended up at.

This tall lengthy mother fucker is piping up in the smoking area. My friend who's easily 5'10 all of a sudden looses his bottle and walks away. So I'm stuck chatting to this nut job! He's blatantly looking for a fight coked off his mind but where my mate has fucked off, I'm now stuck appeasing him.

I look around and even the door staff of this venue are looking cowardly as this guy pipes up! He's easily 6'5 at least and off his nut!

Anyhow, he turns out to be alright. We go inside and party on. (sorry for sounding so gy!)

So we're in teh club once again. My comrade comments saying I could do with a line. This chap we're with had just gone to the clubs toilets at this point. I for one don't give a shit about ketamine! Not my drug of choice nor my cup of tea!

My main man assures me I should follow him in for a key bump or two. Now at this point I'm under the assumption these lot are talking about coke. But this silly dick head is a not only a charlie taker but a key bumper!

I go in and the silly toss pot is off his tits on K holes or whatever it's called in teh toilets. He asked me if I needed sorting out and I assured him if he offered me that key hole shit it would be the last offer he ever made!

So I met up again with that tall scary mofo and did a few keys of cole. Safely assured no bloody keyfob ket faireies got near us!

Any way I hope you all had a great night!

 

[gondo]

?

 

[AGGAMEMNON66]

Nope.

 

[faustian]

Dafuq did I just read

 

[ToxicShocker]

I wanted to say Cool Story Bro, but it really wasnt

 

[JabToucher]

I wanted to say Cool Story Bro, but it really wasnt

No key hole bumper is safe in my books!

 

[Amerikuracana]

Start smoking crack because you obviously want to, take it up the rear because it's all a hell of a drug, tell your dad you are a gay druggie now, directly or indirectly, then die with a bad tattoo or two having only given the world a fake smile that nobody cared about. The end.

 

[ObamaPhoneLady]

?

Could you keep it down? I'm trying to do drugs.

 

[HARRISON_3]

I legit couldn't understand that.

Something about a tall dude busting his nut on you, I think.

 

[Kaybee]

You sound extra dapper when drunk, I don't know half of those phrases you are saying lol

Sounds like a good time though; remember, coke is an eraser for hangovers!

 

[JabToucher]

Start smoking crack because you obviously want to, take it up the rear because it's all a hell of a drug, tell your dad you are a gay druggie now, directly or indirectly, then die with a bad tattoo or two having only given the world a fake smile that nobody cared about. The end.

I don't have any tattoos at all my friend. I'm not a loser as you are sorry chump!

 

[JabToucher]

You sound extra dapper when drunk, I don't know half of those phrases you are saying lol

Sounds like a good time though; remember, coke is an eraser for hangovers!

I'll remember that! As sainsburies say's every little helps!

 

[JabToucher]

I legit couldn't understand that.

Something about a tall dude busting his nut on you, I think.

I came close to chinning him! Until my bro bottle it. Turend out to be alright once I continued chatting to hime no probs!

I did not want to et on teh wrong side of him though!

 

[HARRISON_3]

I came close to chinning him! Until my bro bottle it. Turend out to be alright once I continued chatting to hime no probs!

I did not want to et on teh wrong side of him though!

I prefer my interpretation.

 

[JabToucher]

I prefer my interpretation.

I got teh impression he'd push my shit in for an additional line of charlie!

 

[Arqueto]

I liked you better when you were English.

 

[Amerikuracana]

I don't have any tattoos at all my friend. I'm not a loser as you are sorry chump!

You type like the blonde foreigners on family guy try to talk. And if you're over 23, you're a druggie. True, meeting the right person to do blow with can lead to big opportunities, but I guess we'll see. Not a bad time to be gay, either.

 

[JabToucher]

You type like the blonde foreigners on family guy try to talk. And if you're over 23, you're a druggie. True, meeting the right person to do blow with can lead to big opportunities, but I guess we'll see. Not a bad time to be gay, either.

Right. So I'm off my mind drunk and coked right now yet I have a better comprehension of English than whatever the hell you were attempting to put together.

Have a nice night mate.

 

[Graves The Elder]

stopped reading at 'popped out for a '.

 

[HenryFlower]