Vastectomy?

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by zuffazombee, Nov 2, 2020.

  1. zuffazombee Green Belt

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    Any of you undergone the procedure?

    Any side effects? What was the pain like?

    I'm getting it done in a few hours & I'm just now starting to get nervous. I had a hernia operation a few weeks ago & had no jitters whatsoever, but...these are my boys. We've been through a lot together.

    Anyways, wish me luck Sherbros
     
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  2. Oblivian Aging Platinum Member

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    I had it done a few years ago and it wasn't too bad. I also didn't really take it very easy which prolonged the healing. The pain isn't bad IMO.
     
  3. syct23 ...ElipsisBelt...

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    My dog is also neutered...
     
  4. WaylonMercy5150 Silver Belt

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    Good Luck!
     
  5. DoctorTaco Breadhead

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    Glad I can get in before the virgin crowd starts heckling you about getting your balls cut, demanding your woman get on the pill, etc.

    I had it a few years ago. I’m 36 with a kid from a previous marriage and at the time was dating a wonderful woman who didn’t want to have a baby. I had the procedure done and recovery was a breeze. Took a few days off of work to ice my balls and was back to work in less than a week. Everything healed fine, no trauma or weirdness and sex is no different than before.

    go forth Sherbro and snip the cord.
     
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  6. 2DUM2TAP Silver Belt

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    I had it. Easy. No problems. It's a stichless procedure. Getting a cavity is worse.
    I will tell you how it goes.
    Prep - Shave.
    Go in 30 hour before the procedure. Get a giant bandaid for your balls that has a numbing agent in it. Slap it on. Wait.
    Then doctor comes in gives an injection into each testicle. This is the worst part of the procedure. Feels like someone is squeezing too tight. Not that bad though. Wait a couple min.
    They punch a small hole pull out and cauterize the vas. Don't feel anything at this point.
    Takes about 15 min total. That's it. Walk out. You won't really feel much discomfort if you wear the athletic supporter they give you. You just don't want the clackers to clack. Keep them immobile and you will be fine.

    Go home, lay around for three days with ice packs and play video games or binge watch shows while the wife brings you sammiches. Milk it for all its worth. Had two young kids running around for a few years at that point. It was a mini vacation.

    The key is the rest. You won't feel bad so you might want to do things. Guys that have bad experiences go golfing the same day or stand around and let fluid build up. Don't do that. Just take their advice and do nothing for three days, and take a week or couple weeks off the gym or any strenuous activity.
     
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  7. SpiderCrawl Red Belt

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    Excuse the pun but if I had the balls I'd get it done, got 3 kids and that's enough lol. Update the thread when your out, good luck dude.
     
  8. RDUBYA an oldie but a goodie

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    I've heard of a non scapel vasectomy...I like that idea
     
  9. Zergling White Belt

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  10. shunyata Red Belt

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    Got it done after the third kid. It hurt if I got off the couch for those two days but other than that, nothing.

    If I didn't get it done we'd probably have seven kids by now.

    Hormonal contraception is actually really shitty for women's health, it can massively increase risk of blood clots and thus strokes. Also my wife would become a raging bitch from hell when she was on the pill. They note in the side effects "mood swings". What that actually meant was that every four weeks it was the end of the goddamn world. All that went away when she stopped taking the pill.
     
  11. Zebra Cheeks 2Cheeks Staff Member Senior Moderator

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    Every-time I think of a vasectomy I think of the scene from the office where Michael screams in front of his co workers about the level of exhaustion he feels after having had 3 vasectomies, then having them all reversed.
     
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  12. DoctorTaco Breadhead

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    I was recently divorced In my mid 30s and had to decide which was more likely:

    A. I meet the woman of my dreams but she wants to have kids and now I can’t so we break up and I’m sad, or

    B. I knock up some bartender in her 20s

    statistically speaking, the vasectomy made sense.
     
  13. SammyPops Gold Belt

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    I got the no scapel one done a few years ago.

    No side effects.

    I like creampieing the wife with zero worries. Sex is better for sure.
     
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  14. Chesten_Hesten The Wiener of Steel

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    I just pull out and shoot onto the ceiling and walls.

    The maid cleans it up.

    <{1-69}>
     
  15. zuffazombee Green Belt

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    Thanks for all the replies, guys.

    My situation is like a lot of yours...older guy (47), done having kids (blended family, 9 kids total between wife & I, ages 11 months - 22 years), & we both hate using condoms.

    I'm getting the non-scalpel vastectomy done. Everything I've heard (& you guys have confirmed) is that the idea of being snipped is worse than the actual pain or discomfort.

    I'm off to get ready now & should be home in a few hours. To be honest, I'm looking forward to sitting around & doing nothing for a few days.

    I'll check in when I'm done.
     
  16. Provocateur Red Belt

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    Hopefully there isn't an earthquake while they are operating...
     
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  17. Kudo Blue Belt

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    No, I leave this kind of stuff to Americans.
     
  18. C-H-L Cool Hand (Just the Flu)ke

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    did it just over 6 years ago

    the procedure was easy and SHOULD have been painless but like an idiot, after being frustrated by being given the run-around by the clinic, as they wanted me to do a general anesthetic instead of a local (i still did a local), hours later when the doctor was finally cutting into my first ball, i asked him 'so what's it like looking at balls all day'.

    he waited long enough for the anesthetic to wear off on the 2nd ball and then finished that one - i felt everything.

    healing was fine - who knew ice on your balls felt so good? also, if you do it all the time, it's a perfect excuse for your baby dick - i still ice my balls regularly in case someone sees my garbage pail kids wang.
     
  19. goatfarmer White Belt

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    Best $15 I've ever spent, it's been 17 years of worry free sex. Just remember not to go running around for a week after the procedure no matter how good you feel. I felt great a couple days after and foolishly went out and ran around, paid for it. Just chill and sit around for a week and let everything heal.
     
  20. Strychnine Steel Belt

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    This^

    Lay back in the cut, Ice your groin, and don't lift anything that you even think MIGHT be heavy. Put some boys in the sperm bank if you think you might want kids in the future. Sometimes the procedure can be reversed, but just go in thinking that it'll be permanent.
     

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