The trials and tribulations of eating Ritz Bits cheese cracker sandwiches

Clippy

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@plutonium
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Low and behold the might, the prestige and alure of the glorious

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They're so good, so fun , the perfect ratio of cheese and cracker pour em out and:

1440314.jpg


Yeah like that ever happens.

In a perfect world one would think this happens but it never does. There's always lone halves with missing other halves

And there in begins the struggle

Nobody wants to eat a half ritz sandwich cracker, it's like making a sandwich with one piece of bread so what do you do?

Put it aside on your arm chair and wait for another half, there's one, put it together

NO

why

because each halve has no cheese on it

<34>

It's bad enough they break apart for no reason but they don't break symmetrically (omg I spelled that word right) each half is menacing in it's torment

Now on your arm chair you have two cheese-less crackers that can't make a sandwich

You wait and dig into the box and get a cracker that has only SOME cheese on it

Well you can't make a sandwich until you get another cracker with the same attributes

A full cheese cracker arrives and you can combine it with a no cheese cracker, but can't combine two half cheese crackers

and what about broken crackers? Another can of worms

this is like opening Pandora's Box!!!

Now your arm chair is full of miscellaneous crackers as you try to keep everything sorted but you're quickly running out of real estate. Each rock sends the crackers closer to peril. Cats circle you waiting for their chance.

A delicious treat once full of wonderment and intrigue is lost as soon as you open the package and stick your hand in there.

I just wish they could get their act together in the factory and not put me through this, but nobody complains and we're stuck with the seeds we sow

Funny cheese can both hold and divide at the same time

I'm still going to keep eating these tho
 
You have waaayyyyy too much free time...
 
Handi-snacks shit all over ritz bits! Mmm, processed goo.
 
Polish sausage and cheese cracker sammies >>>>>>
 
Handi-snacks shit all over ritz bits! Mmm, processed goo.

These?

Ritz_1.JPG


Yeah all fun and games until you break a bread stick mid dip

:mad:

also the pressure is on trying to accurately dip 1/8th of the cheese inventory each time

It's so hard to proportionally consume these
 
These?

Ritz_1.JPG


Yeah all fun and games until you break a bread stick mid dip

:mad:

also the pressure is on trying to accurately dip 1/8th of the cheese inventory each time

It's so hard to proportionally consume these


The ones with the flat crackers, not the bread sticks. I just had some of those for the first time in a few years and they've removed the little red plastic cheese applicator stick from them. A quick search showed some reply from Ritz saying they removed it to be more eco-friendly.
 
Ritz don't have enough cheese filling. Ritz aren't sending us their best.
 
The ones with the flat crackers, not the bread sticks. I just had some of those for the first time in a few years and they've removed the little red plastic cheese applicator stick from them. A quick search showed some reply from Ritz saying they removed it to be more eco-friendly.

THAT IS HORSE SHIT

Those crackers don't have the structural integrity to self apply the cheese spread cause they break each time

what what are you suppose to use outside tools to aide in the process?

Terrible cheap bastards
 
THAT IS HORSE SHIT

Those crackers don't have the structural integrity to self apply the cheese spread cause they break each time

what what are you suppose to use outside tools to aide in the process?

Terrible cheap bastards

I don't have proof to back it up, but the cheese seemed to have a lot softer consistency without the stick. I only broke one cracker while eating a couple of packs of the last week or two.
 
They're ruining everything, cheese is suppose to be hard

It's all this bitches's fault:

https://www.complaintsboard.com/com...ckers-and-cheese-honaker-virginia-c90116.html

The first reply there had me laughing.

What should you do? Nothing. That red stick did not break off of something. that red stick is a spreader stick. that is used to spread the cheese on the crackers. If you look around your kitchen, you will see some flat silver things. Those are called knives. you can use those flat knives to spread cheese too. So as you see, kraft was not trying to kill your child. they were simply supplying a spreader stick so your pride and joy would not get cheese all over the hands and fingers.
 
So, many things wrong with the OP.

They are not the perfect ratio. Not even close....not enough filling. For that reason, I normally don't get them.

But, when I do, they are mostly fine. I think it's the Canadian version that's messed up.
 

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