The addiction/depression thread.

[Gazwald]

Ya, the nausea and shakes and sweats really suck but mainly I'm worried about siezures or DT or something life threatening. I'm trying to taper off the alcohol, did better yesterday, didn't binge like I normally do, I just drank as little as I needed to keep the shakes at bay.

I have the benzos if needed. My appetite is $hit right now. And holy crap what a frickin' weird ass night of sleep/dreams!!! - I spent 6-7 hours living between dream land and awake. Like having very vivid dreams and then suddenly popping awake and hearing things. Plus most of the dreams were very violent and negative. So now it's even shittier b/c I'm exhausted. How long until my body actually lets me sleep?? heh.

On the plus side I woke up a little shakey but needed 1/2 a drink to feel OK. That was 2 hours ago and I feel OK now.

I'd take the benzos as directed and begin your detox. If you woke up feeling not too bad then you're ready. Alcohol will drag you back.

 

[Satur9]

I've been in a bad place for 7 months. It's the downside of having been at my most happy period in life, then it went away.

I struggle to look forward and imagine a way that j could be that happy again.

I've settled in to trying to find some sort of comfort I'm being alone, along with my 9 year old daughter, and being I'm with it.

Drugs and depression play a massive role in my life now and I feel that it just runs in cycles now.

Get off the drugs and alcohol, brother. It will never get better if you don't. Or the chances are very slim.

Your daughter will also benefit greatly from it too, so two birds and all that.

 

[TheNinja]

I'd take the benzos as directed and begin your detox. If you woke up feeling not too bad then you're ready. Alcohol will drag you back.

She mentioned I can't take the benzos if I'm going to drive or be at work. It seemed odd but I don't know. I sure that's just doctor speak for being "legal" and all that.
She actually suggested not using the benzos and just taper. But like you said, it's easy to get drug back into it. I've tapered before...got down to 3-4 drinks a day and they a shitty life event happens and 20oz of vodka the next day!
I think I can taper successfully this time. This time honestly scares me I thought I was gonna die. I felt a little shakey/cold sweats again around 8:30 but decided to spend an hour cleaning my storage room. I sweat like a banshee but it helped passed the time and cravings.

Thanks for listening and replying btw.

 

[Gazwald]

She mentioned I can't take the benzos if I'm going to drive or be at work. It seemed odd but I don't know. I sure that's just doctor speak for being "legal" and all that.
She actually suggested not using the benzos and just taper. But like you said, it's easy to get drug back into it. I've tapered before...got down to 3-4 drinks a day and they a shitty life event happens and 20oz of vodka the next day!
I think I can taper successfully this time. This time honestly scares me I thought I was gonna die. I felt a little shakey/cold sweats again around 8:30 but decided to spend an hour cleaning my storage room. I sweat like a banshee but it helped passed the time and cravings.

Thanks for listening and replying btw.

I think you might want to consider getting 4 days off work and detoxing with the benzos. Driving isn't a good idea. In terms of work she probably meant around dangerous machinery/equipment but still. Man, what I would've done for some benzos this time around. I could've been sober in a week instead of going through three weeks of bedlam. Had recurring dreams of being locked in a cell that was filling up with water at an alarming rate. Waking up sitting upright about to scream with my arms flailing around multiple times a night and shit.

 

[TheNinja]

I think you might want to consider getting 4 days off work and detoxing with the benzos. Driving isn't a good idea. In terms of work she probably meant around dangerous machinery/equipment but still. Man, what I would've done for some benzos this time around. I could've been sober in a week instead of going through three weeks of bedlam. Had recurring dreams of being locked in a cell that was filling up with water at an alarming rate. Waking up sitting upright about to scream with my arms flailing around multiple times a night and shit.

Man! That sucks it was so hard this time around!! My problem is nobody else really knows about this right now. I'm afraid the benzos will F me up!! lol
But also kicking it 4 days sounds way better than prolonging this sleepless $hit and shakes for 3 weeks.

How much were you drinking btw? And was it continuous all day or was it more binging? I would basically drink 8-14oz of vodka starting 4pmish and finish 8ish most of the weekdays. On weekends all bets were off though, going strong all day. I could get by from 8pm until the next day at 4pm though. Until this last 5-6 day bender of going at it hard straight...I woke up the next day and was shaking at sweating...by 10 I was praying I'd get to the liquor store before I passed out! Shit was scary.

Anyway, sorry to rant. Sucks about your last detox. It sucks you couldn't get benzos to help out.

 

[Gazwald]

Man! That sucks it was so hard this time around!! My problem is nobody else really knows about this right now. I'm afraid the benzos will F me up!! lol
But also kicking it 4 days sounds way better than prolonging this sleepless $hit and shakes for 3 weeks.

How much were you drinking btw? And was it continuous all day or was it more binging? I would basically drink 8-14oz of vodka starting 4pmish and finish 8ish most of the weekdays. On weekends all bets were off though, going strong all day. I could get by from 8pm until the next day at 4pm though. Until this last 5-6 day bender of going at it hard straight...I woke up the next day and was shaking at sweating...by 10 I was praying I'd get to the liquor store before I passed out! Shit was scary.

Anyway, sorry to rant. Sucks about your last detox. It sucks you couldn't get benzos to help out.

They prescribe librium to alcoholics on detox because it has little recreational value and has minimal potential for addiction. It will chill you out and relax your skeletal muscles so you won't have seizures. I once got given a 45mg dose (the maximum dose) in a detox centre when I woke up with DTs, that was pretty buzzy but the normal dose is meh. It's not like valium or xanax. Not even close.

 

[Gazwald]

How much were you drinking btw?

Sorry, forgot to answer that. I was up to around 4.5 litres of 8% cider a day. Plus whatever anyone brought/left round my house, which was quite a lot on occasion. It was messy.

 

[TheNinja]

Geez!! That's like 5 bottles of 12% wine here in the states. So like 20 "drinks" a day? If my calculations are correct. That's a lot of calories too I'm sure! Glad you are doing better.


I had a full drink around 10:30 before bed. (a drink here is 1.5oz of 40% alcohol) and then a sip (maybe 1/2 drink) at 6:30am and haven't had to have anything since. I might actually be able to make it to 4pm! My goal is at least 2pm. I havne't eaten yet so I hope getting lunch will help as well.

Of course now I'm not sure what I should do. If I don't feel any withdrawal syptoms should I just not drink anything? Or should I drink 1/2 my normal just to "taper"?

Thanks again for participating in the thread. It's nice to have support here. I don't have much in real life so this forum is nice just to share our experiences.

 

[AgonyandIrony]

I just self medicate with weed

I have more anxiety tho. Like I get nervous when I have to do something(Doesn't really matter what)

usually before class I puke at least 1 time before leaving the house

I tend to get bad anxiety before doing shows. I generally throw up before every performance even after three years. Generally as soon as I get my first laugh I feel a lot better. Doing shows sober has been weird, I perform better but a lot of time my anxiety before hitting the stage is way higher.

Its just learning to control the invasive thoughts that are constantly putting yourself down.

 

[Lubaolong]

She mentioned I can't take the benzos if I'm going to drive or be at work. It seemed odd but I don't know. I sure that's just doctor speak for being "legal" and all that.
She actually suggested not using the benzos and just taper. But like you said, it's easy to get drug back into it. I've tapered before...got down to 3-4 drinks a day and they a shitty life event happens and 20oz of vodka the next day!
I think I can taper successfully this time. This time honestly scares me I thought I was gonna die. I felt a little shakey/cold sweats again around 8:30 but decided to spend an hour cleaning my storage room. I sweat like a banshee but it helped passed the time and cravings.

Not to be mean, but it sounds like she doesn't know what she's doing. It's fine if she's doesn't do this type of work and lacks specialized knowledge, but if that's the case, she should refer you to someone who does instead of doing stuff willy-nilly on her own.

 

[Lubaolong]

it has little recreational value and has minimal potential for addiction.

Dunno where you get this idea from.

 

[Gazwald]

Dunno where you get this idea from.

Well, compared to other benzos it's true. I got that from taking most of them recreationally and comparing the effects, along with listening to the opinion of a lot of other people who've done the same and various medical professionals' opinion. Oh and going through numerous detoxes from alcohol using librium. Never known a dealer sell it, never known anyone take it recreationally unless they just had them lying around left over from a detox. Name a commonly prescribed benzodiazepine with less recreational value.

 

[Lubaolong]

Well, compared to other benzos it's true. I got that from taking most of them recreationally and comparing the effects, along with listening to the opinion of a lot of other people who've done the same and various medical professionals' opinion. Oh and going through numerous detoxes from alcohol using librium. Never known a dealer sell it, never known anyone take it recreationally unless they just had them lying around left over from a detox. Name a commonly prescribed benzodiazepine with less recreational value.

It definitely has addiction potential. If it shows up on occasion on drug screens for people who are not prescribed it, then that tells me they obvious are getting something enjoyable out of it if they are buying it off the street. It's less commonly abused, true. As far as common benzos with less recreational value, possibly oxazepam. It has probably even a slower rate of absorption and onset of action.

 

[TheNinja]

Do you guys think if I haven't had a drink since half a drink 9 hours ago I should be somewhat in the clear? Maybe I'm jumping the gun on this. I mean I still feel foggy headed and stuff but don't have shakes or sweats or anything. I can't decide if I should purpose drink a little bit to help the "taper" or if I should go as long as I comfortably can without a drink

 

[TheNinja]

Not to be mean, but it sounds like she doesn't know what she's doing. It's fine if she's doesn't do this type of work and lacks specialized knowledge, but if that's the case, she should refer you to someone who does instead of doing stuff willy-nilly on her own.

She was a general practitioner. Seemed to know enough about it but clearly not specialized in it. She said my heart could stop from a benzo, then prescribed it anyway...lol. She forgot to tell me not to take it with alcohol...but maybe that was clear. I asked her anyway just to be sure.
She was very nice and listened and really seemed to care. Just maybe doesn't have enough knowledge or experience in this particular area. I appreciate the comments though and didn't take them to be mean.

 

[Goonerview]

I tend to get bad anxiety before doing shows. I generally throw up before every performance even after three years. Generally as soon as I get my first laugh I feel a lot better. Doing shows sober has been weird, I perform better but a lot of time my anxiety before hitting the stage is way higher.

Its just learning to control the invasive thoughts that are constantly putting yourself down.

Check out this book: the power of now by Eckart Tolle

There are a couple of chapters about pain bodies and letting go of negative patterns. How to be an observer of your thoughts and emotions and not become them.

Might be useful for you. I found them useful.

 

[AgonyandIrony]

Do you guys think if I haven't had a drink since half a drink 9 hours ago I should be somewhat in the clear? Maybe I'm jumping the gun on this. I mean I still feel foggy headed and stuff but don't have shakes or sweats or anything. I can't decide if I should purpose drink a little bit to help the "taper" or if I should go as long as I comfortably can without a drink

I would say ride it as long as you can. If you don't have the shakes that's a good sign.

Check out this book: the power of now by Eckart Tolle

There are a couple of chapters about pain bodies and letting go of negative patterns. How to be an observer of your thoughts and emotions and not become them.

Might be useful for you. I found them useful.

Hmm I'll have to check it out, once a negative thought pattern takes over I'm essentially beholden to those thoughts. What's weird with my performance anxiety is it's not bombing that gives me anxiety, I've bombed before and generally I'm pretty comfortable onstage with a shitty crowd/having a bad set. It's always the moments before a show that make me start shaking and kick my fight or flight complex into high gear.

 

[faustian]

No competent doctor is going to hand you a benzo rx if he knows your alcohol history. I've heard some people who have bought them off the street to detox, but that comes with some obvious inherent risks.

This is absolutely untrue

 

[RockstarChris]

Sounds dumb, but our Sherbro's suicide attempt hurt a lot.

We all hurt, we're all here for a reason... so share what's on your mind. This thread offers no judgement, only support (I hope).

I'll start.. I didn't buy coke tonight.. I felt a weird hold grab over me as soon as I got paid (I got paid in cash and I finished a 15 hour shift today) I went to the poolhall my dealer is at, and... I just left.

To everyone suffering and struggling, how did you get through the night?

MOD EDIT:

THIS IS NOT A TROLLING THREAD. AND ANY ATTEMPTS TO TROLL OR DERAIL IN AN ATTEMPT FOR CHUCKLES OR SOAPBOX POSTING WILL BE DEALT WITH SWIFTLY. POSSIBLE BANNING. NOT THE PLACE.

what bro tried to kill himself?

 

[faustian]

Not to be mean, but it sounds like she doesn't know what she's doing. It's fine if she's doesn't do this type of work and lacks specialized knowledge, but if that's the case, she should refer you to someone who does instead of doing stuff willy-nilly on her own.

Not to be mean, but it sounds like you have absolutely zero substantive experience with what you're lecturing on. Prescribing a benzo upon discharge for acute alcohol intoxication is a sound practice that might very well save a patient's life, especially when you consider the fact that most ERs don't function as actual detox facilities. I'm not suggesting a refillable script, but something to get the patient through those first few weeks. Otherwise, the patient is very likely to revert back to alcohol because very rarely is a patient fully detoxed upon discharge. A refusal to write a short-term script at that point is just plain incompetence.

EDIT: traced back to the beginning of the question at hand here and I see it's a question of whether a benzo would be prescribed outside of hospitalization. I tend to agree that at this point it's probably not a good idea to put an alcoholic on a long-term benzo treatment plan, however if they're still within 90 days of detox then everything I've said previous would apply. Absolutism in medicine, when improperly applied, can do irreparable harm.

I speak not from experience as a doctor but as someone who has detoxed from alcohol. I know that what worked for me will not work for everyone, however the worst thing a doctor can do is refuse to consider any potentially efficacious remedy.