Another long one, but this'll be the last one since I don't want to talk you and everybody else to death with nonstop 1 million word posts like I usually do 'round here.
That's really what's going on when you're taking drugs. A lot of people look down on addicts as if they're bad people simply because they use drugs but they need to understand what's happening in the brain when someone takes something and why it's so addictive. Certain drugs actually release like 10x more dopamine than sex does, so it's understandable why people get addicted to that high. Once the tolerance goes up, for many addicts it becomes a hunt for the high they used to get when they first started taking what ever they got hooked on and after awhile that becomes difficult for some.
It's also why some people overdose. They were chasing that amazing high they used to get and end up overdoing it accidentally. It annoys me when people look down on all addicts as if they're all bad people but they're not. There's tons of addicts that are real pieces of shit and deserve all the backlash they get for stealing from family, friends, robbing pharmacies or other stores for money to buy drugs, etc. Not all of us are like that, though. There's some people you'd never know are addicts unless they told you. Some are functioning addicts that have families and do just fine in life overall, and some aren't really functioning addicts but they don't steal from their friends and family or rob pharmacies/stores and such.
A lot of things are changing now for addicts where treatment is finally becoming more accessible. Addicts aren't being demonized as much anymore and seen as people with an illness that need help. It's exactly what they need. Before this, like I said, almost all addicts were seen as bad people and left on their own. Treatment wasn't as easily available, they were basically fucked. Today, addicts are finally getting treated right like any person should be treated both as a human being and someone that just needs help for their issue(s). Unfortunately, some addicts are being tossed in prison because we live in a punishment society instead of a rehabilitation society, if that makes sense.
Punishing addicts doesn't help, it often makes shit worse. It's usually easier to get drugs in prison than it is on the street ffs. Addicts shouldn't be punished (unless they're a criminal, robbing people n shit), but given help. Not all addicts want help though 'cause they can't admit they have an issue or they're just not ready to stop. Not being ready to stop is something all addicts go through, I've been through it myself. We all want to live normal lives, we don't want to be on drugs forever, we all want to stop but wanting to stop and being ready to stop are two very different things. When it comes to drug addiction, there's so much to it that most people can't even begin to understand.
There's so many factors to it and sometimes words can't really explain it, instead, sometimes, it's one of those things one must experience for themselves in order to really understand what hardcore addicts go through every day for sometimes years and years. It's not an enjoyable lifestyle. No addict really enjoys the lifestyle. Most of us hate ourselves for having to rely on such things just to feel normal. That's what it usually comes down to for every addict after awhile. Like I said, at first it's about getting high, then it's about not getting sick and just getting by, just being able to feel normal and not like complete shit, bit of course they're still hunting that high they once had.
For me, I hate the withdrawal far more than I ever loved the high. I hate being addicted to opiates, but I'm not going to lie and say I don't enjoy the high because I do enjoy it very much. I don't like saying that because I know it makes me looo bad, but it's true. Drugs make you feel good, especially opiates. I really wish I just stuck to weed. My life wouldn't be so fucked if I never took any of these pills. I wish I only took it twice like you did with coke and never went back. I had my reasons at the time when I started self-medicating though, it wasn't for fun, it was to get my mind off of something and it worked at the time.
Then it created something so much worse - an addiction that is still plaguing me 6 1/2 years later (reason I started is 'cause my gf or 2 years broke up with me n fucked some guy my gf before her had cheated on me with, that's why I went to drugs, I only take opiates and been on it for about 6 1/2 years as I said, but I used to be worse 'cause I used to mix it with coke, liquor and tons of weed everyday for about a year, so when I talk about abusing my body..)
I guess I'll cut it off here. I could say so much more but I have to stop myself, lol. Another classic That209 post.
/rant