Squat poetry

Discussion in 'Strength & Conditioning Discussion' started by Lard-ass, Jan 2, 2006.

  1. Lard-ass

    Lard-ass Sodomizer

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    Location:
    Moonshining and banjo pickinĀ“ in Aintry.
    Down the road, in a gym far away
    A young man was heard to say,
    "No matter what I do, my legs won't grow!"
    He tried leg extensions, leg curls, leg presses too.
    Trying to cheat, these sissy workouts he'd do!
    From the corner of the gym where the big guys train,
    Through a cloud of chalk and the midst of pain,
    Where the big iron rides high, and threatin' lives,
    Where the noise is made with big forty-fives,
    A deep voice bellowed as he wrapped his knees,
    A very big man with legs like trees,
    Laughing as he snatched another plate from the stack,
    Chalked his hands and monstrous back,
    Said, "Boy, stop lying and don't say you've forgotten!
    Trouble with you is you aint been SQUATIN'!!"
    (Jeff Maddog)


    Maybe you
     
  2. fat_wilhelm

    fat_wilhelm Black Belt

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    Knee wraps are for pussies.
     
  3. #1can

    #1can Blue Belt

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    knee wraps are for people who squat bigger than you do.
     
  4. datadog

    datadog Blue Belt

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    You did mean this as sarcasm right? Go watch the strongman contests if you think knee wraps are for pussies...
     
  5. fat_wilhelm

    fat_wilhelm Black Belt

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    Hmmmm, #1can... I don't think so. I checked your post in "Goals for 2006". I assume you'll be using wraps for your 375 attempt? I hit 495 for 2-4 reps regularly w/o wraps at 205 bodyweight so be careful w/ the assumptions. And no, I don't think I'm the shit because of that. I realize there are plenty of guys here (Carnal, for one) that can squat that, plus me sitting on the bar, for reps. I'm just making a point.

    And datadog, yes, I was being sarcastic. However, I never use them (or a belt, for that matter) anymore. I used to use wraps religiously, but my knee strength wasn't keeping up w/ my legs, so I quit. I don't compete in powerlifting... If I did, I'd use them. For sports I do take part in (MMA, soccer), I don't wear wraps when competing/playing and therefore, don't see any benefit to wearing them in the gym. Just my personal preference.

    For the record, I don't really think people that wear wraps are pussies.

    http://www6.mailordercentral.com/ironmind/prodinfo.asp?number=1233-SQS
     
  6. #1can

    #1can Blue Belt

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    yeah i don't use knee wraps either, and i never claimed i was strong. see, knee wraps are for people who squat bigger than you. since i don't squat bigger than you, i don't use knee wraps.

    ps. i am still joking
     
  7. datadog

    datadog Blue Belt

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    Interesting. I've have knee problems, hurt maniscus, etc which kept me from doing any leg work for months (well, rehab but that's more stretching). I'm going really slowly on squat, it will take months till I'm past what most of the big boys here warm up with. Would you suggest doing it without wraps for the strength gains in the knee, or with to avoid hurting them?

    I've been thinking of getting those mini wraps that fit under the knee, look like the tennis elbow wraps. So, that would only make me a partial pussy right :)

    // sorry for missing the sarcasm off the bat, at times people are so forceful on boards that it's hard to tell...
     
  8. Madmick

    Madmick Cerebrage Staff Member Senior Moderator

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  9. fat_wilhelm

    fat_wilhelm Black Belt

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    datadog -

    I'm certainly not the authority on this topic, but when I used to wrap my knees, I'd take them off once in a while and it would feel like my knees were going to snap on sets much lighter than what I was doing w/wraps. This was only about a year ago. Finally I decided to quit "cold turkey". I reduced the weight I was using and slowly increased it until I got back up and beyond what I was using w/ wraps. Now, I can go heavy w/o my knees feeling fragile as hell.

    Mind you, I've never had knee injuries (ankles were my thing), so I don't want to give you bad advice. Personally, I'll never go back to using them because my knees feel so much stronger now, but hopefully someone else will advise what the best way to work formerly injured knees is.

    Likewise, my back feels much stronger since ditching the belt. The couple things I do still use from time to time are gloves for wrist support on heavy benching and straps for really heavy deadlifting, though I'm trying to ween myself off both of those, too.

    #1can -

    I didn't mean to come off as snotty in my last post. I guess I just took your original reply as "trash talking" of sorts (which it was not) and I felt compelled to defend myself.

    Madmick -

    Glad the poem saved you from the realm of abundantly moronic high school football coaches. As a soccer player, I'd blast the weights on my own while the football players took the advice of our overweight, out-of-shape football coach, wondering why a forward on the soccer team could outlift each and every one of them. My personal inspiration in my younger days came in the form of popping Pumping Iron into my VCR and watching Arnold and Franco at the squat rack.
     

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