Shower Seltzies

Red Beard said:
It has occurred to me that I haven't made my Mayberry Thread of the Year yet for 2024 and I wanted to change that.

Guys, we are getting older. I just turned 39 and long gone are that days of partying.

I have a few pops here and there, but now I love staying hydrated.

Back when I was a partier, I used to drink a cold beer in the shower (usually Coors or PBR) and I'd be so chill.

@Woldog pay attention because this will be the best thread you've ever read and I wrote something on your wall that you should reply to. Guys, everyone should go @Woldog 's wall and read our fun back and forth exchanges. He always thinks I'll say something serious but it just silly goose puns every time.

Anyway, this past weekend, I mowed the lawn and raked up all the leaves for the first of three total swipe throughs on Compound De Red.

After I finished, I was tired and wanted to just chill.

I invented the Shower Seltzie.

I went in my shower with a Polar Cranberry Lime Seltzie and I enjoyed the hell out of the bubbles.

I highly recommend you guys try this out. I guess you could use a soda, but something liberating about ripping burps in the shower.

You guys ever drank a seltzer in the shower?



7634_preview-60b4adb3108d4b449a99cc41893fd65d.jpg

kramer-seinfeld.gif
Click to expand...
I f’n love those things. La Croix, Bubbly, Waterloo, all of them.

Back in the day, I used to love mixing those with my favorite vodka for a nice refreshing beverage.

Too many of those, and I would slam several of those (sans vodka) the next day. But damn were they tasty.
 
Red Beard said:
It has occurred to me that I haven't made my Mayberry Thread of the Year yet for 2024 and I wanted to change that.

Guys, we are getting older. I just turned 39 and long gone are that days of partying.

I have a few pops here and there, but now I love staying hydrated.

Back when I was a partier, I used to drink a cold beer in the shower (usually Coors or PBR) and I'd be so chill.

@Woldog pay attention because this will be the best thread you've ever read and I wrote something on your wall that you should reply to. Guys, everyone should go @Woldog 's wall and read our fun back and forth exchanges. He always thinks I'll say something serious but it just silly goose puns every time.

Anyway, this past weekend, I mowed the lawn and raked up all the leaves for the first of three total swipe throughs on Compound De Red.

After I finished, I was tired and wanted to just chill.

I invented the Shower Seltzie.

I went in my shower with a Polar Cranberry Lime Seltzie and I enjoyed the hell out of the bubbles.

I highly recommend you guys try this out. I guess you could use a soda, but something liberating about ripping burps in the shower.

You guys ever drank a seltzer in the shower?



7634_preview-60b4adb3108d4b449a99cc41893fd65d.jpg

kramer-seinfeld.gif
Click to expand...

When I was 15 years old my mom had a seizure and lost her sense of smell, so I used to smoke joints in the shower and she never knew.
I would steam up the bathroom and stand in the back of the shower.
I did this for almost a year whilst never getting caught.

So one day Im in the shower smoking and I get out, but I hear my mother talking to her boyfriend at the time and I knew I was pretty fucked, he wasn't supposed to be there until the next day from work (he was a pipefitter and travelled a lot).
I come out of my bedroom to get a drink and he walks in the kitchen and says "I know what you did in there" and points at the bathroom.

I told him I had no idea what he was talking about...he said "you know".
I walked back in my room and started laughing.
That cunt must've told my mother because she moved him into our house like 2 weeks later, and he took a regional job so he could be home every night.

Needless to say...my fuckin days of shower joints were over...fuckin hated that guy, before and after that...shitbag rat lol
 
This thread is shocking to the core

Beer in the shower is equivalent to a cigarette on the treadmill….. makes no sense <lol>
 
Keep your shower seltzies. Ready for this?

Bath. Bath Bomb. Bong... Bath Bomb Bong!

You've never lived!
 
Trying to get a bunch of guys to get naked and drink seltzer waters?

Teddy Roosevelt is rolling over in his grave right now.
 
Zer said:
This reminds me of a classic thread where some sherdogger was like 'Is it weird to eat while you're shitting?'. Anyone remember that one? Dude was taking his Subway order into the bathroom with him and his girl noticed and got (rightly) creeped out about it and he didn't understand why since he'd been doing it for years. Legit one of the most disturbing, degenerate threads I've ever seen
Click to expand...

Great way to save time. Kill two birds with one stone.

No different than shitting in the shower, which we all do.
 
Fedorgasm said:
How long are your showers?

I kinda want to get in and out, then sit on the couch and relax with a drink.

If you want to relax and get clean simultaneously, might I recommend a bath instead? If you're worried about it looking feminine you can smoke a cigar.

images
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If you can’t drink a beer in the time it takes to shower you should be in the bath like a woman
 
William Huggins said:
What about keeping your toothbrush exposed near a toilet?
Click to expand...
Anytime I see toothbrushes in people's bathrooms that are out in the open, I get the heebie jeebies. They generally keep the lid up when they flush too. Fucking savages.
 
ObsoleteSoul said:
Anytime I see toothbrushes in people's bathrooms that are out in the open, I get the heebie jeebies. They generally keep the lid up when they flush too. Fucking savages.
Click to expand...
Apparently you and my wife went to the same school of "Hell no".
 
Red Beard said:
It has occurred to me that I haven't made my Mayberry Thread of the Year yet for 2024 and I wanted to change that.

Guys, we are getting older. I just turned 39 and long gone are that days of partying.

I have a few pops here and there, but now I love staying hydrated.

Back when I was a partier, I used to drink a cold beer in the shower (usually Coors or PBR) and I'd be so chill.

@Woldog pay attention because this will be the best thread you've ever read and I wrote something on your wall that you should reply to. Guys, everyone should go @Woldog 's wall and read our fun back and forth exchanges. He always thinks I'll say something serious but it just silly goose puns every time.

Anyway, this past weekend, I mowed the lawn and raked up all the leaves for the first of three total swipe throughs on Compound De Red.

After I finished, I was tired and wanted to just chill.

I invented the Shower Seltzie.

I went in my shower with a Polar Cranberry Lime Seltzie and I enjoyed the hell out of the bubbles.

I highly recommend you guys try this out. I guess you could use a soda, but something liberating about ripping burps in the shower.

You guys ever drank a seltzer in the shower?



7634_preview-60b4adb3108d4b449a99cc41893fd65d.jpg

kramer-seinfeld.gif
Click to expand...

I don't mind a shower beer, a seltzer would be ok if you're a homosexual I suppose
 
Polar is the superior seltzer it is known

& yes, i have drank a seltz in the shower
 
Zer said:
This reminds me of a classic thread where some sherdogger was like 'Is it weird to eat while you're shitting?'. Anyone remember that one? Dude was taking his Subway order into the bathroom with him and his girl noticed and got (rightly) creeped out about it and he didn't understand why since he'd been doing it for years. Legit one of the most disturbing, degenerate threads I've ever seen
Click to expand...

Yeah, that’s vile. Poo germs just flying around in the bathroom while you’re dropping one. I’m sure his subway was a feces steak and cheese.
 
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