Shower Seltzies

Red Beard

Red Beard

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It has occurred to me that I haven't made my Mayberry Thread of the Year yet for 2024 and I wanted to change that.

Guys, we are getting older. I just turned 39 and long gone are that days of partying.

I have a few pops here and there, but now I love staying hydrated.

Back when I was a partier, I used to drink a cold beer in the shower (usually Coors or PBR) and I'd be so chill.

@Woldog pay attention because this will be the best thread you've ever read and I wrote something on your wall that you should reply to. Guys, everyone should go @Woldog 's wall and read our fun back and forth exchanges. He always thinks I'll say something serious but it just silly goose puns every time.

Anyway, this past weekend, I mowed the lawn and raked up all the leaves for the first of three total swipe throughs on Compound De Red.

After I finished, I was tired and wanted to just chill.

I invented the Shower Seltzie.

I went in my shower with a Polar Cranberry Lime Seltzie and I enjoyed the hell out of the bubbles.

I highly recommend you guys try this out. I guess you could use a soda, but something liberating about ripping burps in the shower.

You guys ever drank a seltzer in the shower?



7634_preview-60b4adb3108d4b449a99cc41893fd65d.jpg

kramer-seinfeld.gif
 
This reminds me of a classic thread where some sherdogger was like 'Is it weird to eat while you're shitting?'. Anyone remember that one? Dude was taking his Subway order into the bathroom with him and his girl noticed and got (rightly) creeped out about it and he didn't understand why since he'd been doing it for years. Legit one of the most disturbing, degenerate threads I've ever seen
 
How long are your showers?

I kinda want to get in and out, then sit on the couch and relax with a drink.

If you want to relax and get clean simultaneously, might I recommend a bath instead? If you're worried about it looking feminine you can smoke a cigar.

images
 
nonoob said:
No, but pics or it didn't happen.
<NoneOfMy>
Click to expand...
You wish, buck-o!!!
Zer said:
This reminds me of a classic thread where some sherdogger was like 'Is it weird to eat while you're shitting?'. Anyone remember that one? Dude was taking his Subway order into the bathroom with him and his girl noticed and got (rightly) creeped out about it and he didn't understand why since he'd been doing it for years. Legit one of the most disturbing, degenerate threads I've ever seen
Click to expand...
LOL I remember that. I don't even pee in my shower so it is all on the up and up.
Fedorgasm said:
How long are your showers?

I kinda want to get in and out, then sit on the couch and relax with a drink.

If you want to relax and get clean simultaneously, might I recommend a bath instead? If you're worried about it looking feminine you can smoke a cigar.

images
Click to expand...
I do like a good bath and have made a thread about it, but standing in the steam sipping a seltzie is hard to beat.
 
Zer said:
This reminds me of a classic thread where some sherdogger was like 'Is it weird to eat while you're shitting?'. Anyone remember that one? Dude was taking his Subway order into the bathroom with him and his girl noticed and got (rightly) creeped out about it and he didn't understand why since he'd been doing it for years. Legit one of the most disturbing, degenerate threads I've ever seen
Click to expand...
A guy i use to work with was telling us a story about how his girlfriend gives him blowjobs while he is taking a shit. And he was dead serious about it even after we were all grossed out.
 
Zer said:
This reminds me of a classic thread where some sherdogger was like 'Is it weird to eat while you're shitting?'. Anyone remember that one? Dude was taking his Subway order into the bathroom with him and his girl noticed and got (rightly) creeped out about it and he didn't understand why since he'd been doing it for years. Legit one of the most disturbing, degenerate threads I've ever seen
Click to expand...

Maybe he's like the human equivalent of a baby bird...... Poops straight after eating..... Just his mum is no longer there to fly away with it in her mouth.....
 
Red Beard said:
It has occurred to me that I haven't made my Mayberry Thread of the Year yet for 2024 and I wanted to change that.

Guys, we are getting older. I just turned 39 and long gone are that days of partying.

I have a few pops here and there, but now I love staying hydrated.

Back when I was a partier, I used to drink a cold beer in the shower (usually Coors or PBR) and I'd be so chill.

@Woldog pay attention because this will be the best thread you've ever read and I wrote something on your wall that you should reply to. Guys, everyone should go @Woldog 's wall and read our fun back and forth exchanges. He always thinks I'll say something serious but it just silly goose puns every time.

Anyway, this past weekend, I mowed the lawn and raked up all the leaves for the first of three total swipe throughs on Compound De Red.

After I finished, I was tired and wanted to just chill.

I invented the Shower Seltzie.

I went in my shower with a Polar Cranberry Lime Seltzie and I enjoyed the hell out of the bubbles.

I highly recommend you guys try this out. I guess you could use a soda, but something liberating about ripping burps in the shower.

You guys ever drank a seltzer in the shower?



7634_preview-60b4adb3108d4b449a99cc41893fd65d.jpg

kramer-seinfeld.gif
Click to expand...
If you have a beard shave it off. Something tells me after you finish your shower seltzie's you play a game to see how many empty cans you can fit in your prison pocket.
 
Zer said:
This reminds me of a classic thread where some sherdogger was like 'Is it weird to eat while you're shitting?'. Anyone remember that one? Dude was taking his Subway order into the bathroom with him and his girl noticed and got (rightly) creeped out about it and he didn't understand why since he'd been doing it for years. Legit one of the most disturbing, degenerate threads I've ever seen
Click to expand...

I just call that the circle of life. Pretty sure Elton John wrote a song about it.

I went to dinner with my ex's coworkers one time. They all brought their partners except for one girl. She wound up admitting after a few drinks that her boyfriend likes to sit on her lap, facing her, while she takes a shit.
 
Red Beard said:
You wish, buck-o!!!

LOL I remember that. I don't even pee in my shower so it is all on the up and up.

I do like a good bath and have made a thread about it, but standing in the steam sipping a seltzie is hard to beat.
Click to expand...

Redzie, calling it a seltzie makes it seem like you has tendenzies lol
 
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