Month 1. torture. Maybe made it through 2 minutes of warmups before having to stop. This got better over the course of the monts but I never finished a warmup. Threw up several times during warm ups. I always tried to do the techniques when rolling/live drilling. I'm bigger than most guys in my school so they all took turns turning me into a pretzel. Threw up at least every other class and would need frequent breaks when rolling. Month 2. Quit smoking cigarettes. Warm ups were better but still really tough. Was still throwing up but not so often. Still got smashed when rolling but would pull of the odd sweep from time to time and was lasting a little longer without needing a break. Month 3. Warmups suck but I can finish. Learning more and more techniques and I find myself thinking about Jiu Jitsu constantly. I mean constantly. I can't stop talking about it. Eventually convince 2 of my very close friends to join my school. Tapped out a couple of smaller guys a couple times when rolling but still getting smashed and feeling helpless in most positions. I sense I'm getting the hang of some of the basics. Month 4. More of the same, but I'm finding I'm trying to go for more technique attempts and taking some risks. Failing miserably at pulling them off, but I'm trying ands learning a lot from the mistakes I'm making. Starting to realize that timing is extremely important. Learning to breathe while rolling. Practicing breathing and thinking about Jiu Jitsu during most of the day. Attempting more submissions/sweeps and learning the importance of breaking grips. Relaxing more when rolling. Not holding my breath as much. Got a stripe from Sinistro. Felt I didn't deserve it but my training partners all believed I did so I trust them. Felt good. Btw warmups still fucking blow. Month 5. Competed in my first tournament. Was up 9 zip when the ref stood us up with me mounted out of bounds. Experienced adrenaline dump and now know the true meaning of exhausted. My body stopped responding and I lost my match by one point. Was a great experience and I can't wait to do it again. The guys I train with took gold, gold, and bronze so I feel pretty damn good about the quality of instruction I'm getting. After competing I feel a new level of love for the sport. I'm rolling hard, taking much fewer breaks, only throwing up once in a while and warm ups still suck but not as much as they used to. Month 6. I sense improvement. I'm still getting tossed but the higher belts I roll with now are having a tougher time tapping me. I feel strong in the side mount position and I was told tonight by a purple belt that my shoulder pressure from side mount is nasty. Very happy about that. Learning the basics and using open mat nights to help the two friends catch up on the techniques they don't know. They are becoming fantastic training partners. I kind of have an idea of what I should be going for in most positions /grip breaking/breaking posture...etc. im also getting very close with my training parthers and we are becoming a team. Its awesome. And war ups....piece of cake...NOT!! All in all this has been the most difficult thing I've ever done. Also. FYI. I'm 40, 230 pounds was a fat bastard my whole life and started weight training about 18 months ago and got myself down to 19% body fat before joing my school. Haven't touched a weight since starting jits. I don't know if this will help anyone, but to those discouraged noobs....stick with it. It gets better and better. Even though the beatings don't ever stop, you'll take pleasure in the small improvements you see over time. Thanks for reading..I welcome your comments and advice.