If you designed Jurassic Park how would you make it safe?

[cmw43]

I would only hire orientals. They get shit done.

I dunno this guy ended up being a villain.

 

[Low Test With da Best]

How would Takeshi 69 halp

 

[ocean size]

guns? fuck that. I'm going to have the leftists come take them all. I'm not spending billions cloning dinosaurs for some $13/hr shithead that couldn't get hired to give traffic tickets to get trigger happy just because some karen let her daughter hang her arm over the wall.

I won't make it safe. We don't need that nanny state bullshit. I'll just have air tight liability waivers upon entry.

 

[loyalyolayal]

I dunno this guy ended up being a villain.

Still alive and getting shit done.

 

[Iroh]

Don't open it to the public.

 

[ssBaldy]

But you would have to contend with PETA constantly rioting outside the gates and maybe sending in covert operatives to disable the explosives.

Invite the PETA activists to make a peaceful, unsupervised protest inside the Velociraptor enclosure.

 

[Ichibanner]

Play Sarah McLachlan's "Arms of an Angel" on continuous loop over loudspeakers. No creature can possibly get violent while hearing that!

 

[DoomPatrol]

Cause in the movies the humans dont believe in heavy firepower, or multiple fences or backup generators.


Here is what I would do, all major big dinosaur breeds and ALL Carnivores would be in large enclosures that are built into and below the ground. Hills, bluffs, and cliffsides would be the walls of their enclosures.

And the MOATS would be water or something that makes it impossible to get any speed to climb the wall.

Electric fences, 2 layered, first interior layer is electric. Tops are razor wire, all fence areas have guard towers in key locations that look down at the Dinosaurs.

Guard towers equipped with tranquealizer guns and M60 machine guns and 50 caliber m2 brownings along with grenade launchers. All guards hold ak74´s or HK417 battle rifles.

Doesn't that feel kind of sketchy that they are like "well we really need another 6 feet on that barrier to finally be safe from these monsters on the other side you're looking at."

 

[HeffDoesWant]

Underground walkways with viewing via perspex glass domes or high towers.

 

[loyalyolayal]

Send me your death row inmates.

 

[Medulla Omoplata]

I would make it so no one is allowed to wear pants

 

[erhnamdjinn]

the only way to have made it safe was only use herbivore dinosaurs. Maybe the trex, but it was a ticking timebomb to make the raptors and any other carnivores and the new hybrid ones with cloaking tech. Lolz because a trex, raptor hybrid that can cloak is the smartest idea.

 

[Lethal_Striker]

Don't let Newman work at Jurassic Park is step 1.

 

[Low Test With da Best]

More beards:

More violent tendencies:

More psychadelics:

But no matter what, the kid still gets sparked:

 

[Hogey]

I’d have dinosaurs that the guest could fuck.

 

[MusclesMarinara]

Keep a large, mostly iron, rock in vast orbit in case things get out of hand.

 

[gspieler]

Just call the dinosaurs pit bulls, then it won’t matter what they do...

“Not a real velociraptor”
“T-Rex’s were originally bred to be nanny dinosaurs“
“It’s not the dinosaur; it’s the park guest”
“I have a allosaurus, and he wouldn’t hurt a fly”
Etc

 

[Aegon Spengler]

Cause in the movies the humans dont believe in heavy firepower, or multiple fences or backup generators.


Here is what I would do, all major big dinosaur breeds and ALL Carnivores would be in large enclosures that are built into and below the ground. Hills, bluffs, and cliffsides would be the walls of their enclosures.

And the MOATS would be water or something that makes it impossible to get any speed to climb the wall.

Electric fences, 2 layered, first interior layer is electric. Tops are razor wire, all fence areas have guard towers in key locations that look down at the Dinosaurs.

Guard towers equipped with tranquealizer guns and M60 machine guns and 50 caliber m2 brownings along with grenade launchers. All guards hold ak74´s or HK417 battle rifles.

Dude that’s not a theme park that’s just a prison. To make a theme park you just add some of the non human eaters to a regular zoo.

Although

What does @Zookeeper Gabe think? His thoughts are always necessary

 

[Oceanmachine]

Dude that’s not a theme park that’s just a prison. To make a theme park you just add some of the non human eaters to a regular zoo.

Although

What does @Zookeeper Gabe think? His thoughts are always necessary

No id give the animals a ton of room. But for the dangerous dinasours you need heavy fire power.

Jurassic park movies have taught me 12 guage rounds and even 50 cal isnt enough.


Autocannons that fire 20 to 30mm rounds should be issued

 

[Stargazer Rex]

I wouldn't hire anyone over 250 pounds.