This is something that scares the shit out of me now. I had 31 Muay Thai fights with a whole heap of concussions through my 20s. Now 37yo with a young family and its always in the back my mind - wondering when it will catch up with me. It's something you just don't think about while you're living it.
I'm at a similar age with similar number of fights under my belt across MMA, Muay Thai and Boxing at a high level.
Brain health was never spoken about in the culture, in fact you were called a pussy if you brought it up.
Gotta stay hard.
All our coaches only thought guys who got laid out unconscious multiple times had their chins compromised and might get Parkinson's later on.
The risks of shaking the brain in training over and over and the possibility of CTE developing later in life was completely unknown or disregarded.
I remember having massive headaches after wall/cage wrestling rounds, driving and slamming effectively relies so much on using your hear head to drive and pressure.
I never got knocked unconscious in a fight but did get dropped a few times and got up and continued to fight hard, who knows how bad that could have been, particularly when I had dehydrated myself significantly 24 hours before to make weight.
I stopped fighting after a combination of painful disc issues and having 2 epileptic seizures. MRI revealed a deformed blood vessel deep in my frontal lobe. Could have been there before fighting or acquired, not sure.
Took me a few years to come to terms with it and talk about it openly. My brain's inner dialogue and the side effects of seizure medication did make me feel very lost for a while there and I understand why other retired fighters don't like to talk about it.
Hopefully we can continue to learn more and more about neurology and how we can mitigate the risks for future athletes.
I'm very conflicted about coaching again, despite people begging me for knowledge.
I'm now at a point where I realize even if you told me at 18 how risky this path was, I still would have fucking done it.
Just need to help other crazy wannabe fighters understand the science behind brain health and avoid the same damage while also developing the resilience to throw down in a cage no matter the situation.