Give it up for old people

[MoparOrNoCar]

We think of these guys as orthopedic shoe wearing, TV guide reading, get off my lawn grumpy assholes but god damn did they live rich lives. My grandpa used to tell me about running from the cops in his old hopped up Chevy. He didn't even brag about it either. When I asked if he ever ran from the cops he'd just say "Yeah I'd run off and leave em if I didn't want to stop". Later on he would see them at the diner and they'd wink at each other like it was nothing.

He liked living vicariously through me and would ask me "What did you do today kid?". I'd be like well first I stopped at Starbucks to start my day with a Vanilla chai tea....kids temperature of course....then I got to work and struggled all day to get the copy machine to feed paper correctly. After work I headed down to Walgreens to pick up a snuggie before going home and watching a rerun of the Royal Wedding. He would pretend like that sounded like a good day but I know in his head he was thinking wtf is wrong with kids these days?

Back in his day he was up at 4am welding together turnpikes and shit. Forging the infrastructure of America. By 3pm he was already at the bar getting tanked up...cracking the skulls of some Hells Angels. When the cops were hot on his ass as he's leaving the bar, he'd downshift that sumbitch into 3rd and head up to the hills where he would shower under a waterfall and make love to a wild Indian woman. On his way back down he would take a service call at the railroad and by 11pm he was back at home knocking boots with my grandma.

These guys deserve our respect so stay the fuck off their lawns.

 

[Misfit23]

I usually respect my elders unless they're a racist POS.

 

[Stargazer Rex]

Man, I love making love to a wild Indian woman.

 

[BisexualMMA]

There's a lot to be learned from those old farts, but most people don't have the wisdom to seek out their wisdom.

 

[MoparOrNoCar]

There's a lot to be learned from those old farts, but most people don't have the wisdom to seek out their wisdom.

It's tough to get past the small talk but once you do, they usually have some crazy stories to tell. An older mexican guy at the DMV was telling me once about how they had to go work in these remote areas and they had to pack heat because they had to go through private land. When they got to where the roads were no longer stable enough for vehicles, they rode donkeys the rest of the way.

 

[Dizzy]

We think of these guys as orthopedic shoe wearing, TV guide reading, get off my lawn grumpy assholes but god damn did they live rich lives. My grandpa used to tell me about running from the cops in his old hopped up Chevy. He didn't even brag about it either. When I asked if he ever ran from the cops he'd just say "Yeah I'd run off and leave em if I didn't want to stop". Later on he would see them at the diner and they'd wink at each other like it was nothing.

He liked living vicariously through me and would ask me "What did you do today kid?". I'd be like well first I stopped at Starbucks to start my day with a Vanilla chai tea....kids temperature of course....then I got to work and struggled all day to get the copy machine to feed paper correctly. After work I headed down to Walgreens to pick up a snuggie before going home and watching a rerun of the Royal Wedding. He would pretend like that sounded like a good day but I know in his head he was thinking wtf is wrong with kids these days?

Back in his day he was up at 4am welding together turnpikes and shit. Forging the infrastructure of America. By 3pm he was already at the bar getting tanked up...cracking the skulls of some Hells Angels. When the cops were hot on his ass as he's leaving the bar, he'd downshift that sumbitch into 3rd and head up to the hills where he would shower under a waterfall and make love to a wild Indian woman. On his way back down he would take a service call at the railroad and by 11pm he was back at home knocking boots with my grandma.

These guys deserve our respect so stay the fuck off their lawns.

 

[loyalyolayal]

Did he benched the 275 though?

 

[MoparOrNoCar]

Did he benched the 275 though?

I'm not sure if they had weights back then but he did mention getting into a flat head Ford engine block benching contest with his pals Skeeter and Wet Biscuit McGee.

 

[AGGAMEMNON66]

We think of these guys as orthopedic shoe wearing, TV guide reading, get off my lawn grumpy assholes but god damn did they live rich lives. My grandpa used to tell me about running from the cops in his old hopped up Chevy. He didn't even brag about it either. When I asked if he ever ran from the cops he'd just say "Yeah I'd run off and leave em if I didn't want to stop". Later on he would see them at the diner and they'd wink at each other like it was nothing.

He liked living vicariously through me and would ask me "What did you do today kid?". I'd be like well first I stopped at Starbucks to start my day with a Vanilla chai tea....kids temperature of course....then I got to work and struggled all day to get the copy machine to feed paper correctly. After work I headed down to Walgreens to pick up a snuggie before going home and watching a rerun of the Royal Wedding. He would pretend like that sounded like a good day but I know in his head he was thinking wtf is wrong with kids these days?

Back in his day he was up at 4am welding together turnpikes and shit. Forging the infrastructure of America. By 3pm he was already at the bar getting tanked up...cracking the skulls of some Hells Angels. When the cops were hot on his ass as he's leaving the bar, he'd downshift that sumbitch into 3rd and head up to the hills where he would shower under a waterfall and make love to a wild Indian woman. On his way back down he would take a service call at the railroad and by 11pm he was back at home knocking boots with my grandma.

These guys deserve our respect so stay the fuck off their lawns.

 

[Organic Damage]

I dunno about you guys but I'm not giving up this sweet booty for any old fogeys.

 

[HomeRun916]

If it's to old to fuck, I'll pass.

 

[Sir Galahad]

I've met lot of old veterans and have the utmost respect for their service.

 

[HelloJapan]

 

[HelloJapan]

If it's to old to fuck, I'll pass.

 

[WorldofWarcraft]

I, too, respect old people, especially the pornographic beauty type

 

[Pixelated Porn]

I usually respect my elders unless they're a racist POS.

Oh God. This is where we are at? How do you feel about the BLM racists?

 

[Striderxdj]

I think old people get to the point where their "personal" stories are an amalgamation of their lives, the lives of their cool friends and movie heroes of their day but toned down for believability.

Nearly every old person who served in a war participated in some spectacular event and when you do a paid geneology report you find out they were a cook and never even saw action.

 

[Da Speeit]

There's a lot to be learned from those old farts, but most people don't have the wisdom to seek out their wisdom.

This is a myth

 

[PubliusVentidius]

My grandad randomly killed a hare by throwing a rock at it. And once glanced Mussolini and Hitler on a train passing by. That's about it, he's got nothing on TS grandad.

 

[Misfit23]

Oh God. This is where we are at? How do you feel about the BLM racists?

I hate all racists. I don't why BLM would get a pass. I can't hate on old people for being racists? If it makes you feel better the majority of the geezers that I know that are racists are my family.