Cracked's 7 Special Membership Types Every Gym Needs to Offer

[Vulcan]

#7. The "I'm Here to Bother Women" Plan

#6. The "I'm Here to Talk Shit About CrossFit and Cardio" Plan

#5. The "Unnecessary Workout Advice" Plan

#4. The "It's Cool, I Know the Trainers" Plan

#3. The "I Need a Prime Spot Close to the Mirror" Plan

#2. The "Can I Get a Quick Set in Between Your Sets?" Plan

#1. The "I'm Furious About How Crowded It Is" Plan

http://www.cracked.com/blog/7-special-membership-types-every-gym-needs-to-offer/

 

[LatFlare]

No "Especially Elite because I'm more Elite than you" plan?

 

[Ethan]

How about a "New Years Resolutions are bullshit so let me lift in peace" plan?

 

[Sarumyan]

8> " I only do functional training like super sets in the middle of the gym so everyone can see that I am not a bodybuilder" plan

 

[Sarumyan]

9. "I could kick anyone's butt in here 50 years ago, so I will just read a newspaper on that abductor machine..." plan. Comes with "I only come to gym so I can flash myself in the locker room" option.

 

[gspieler]

10. The "talk unnecessarily loud in the presence of others about my routine, lift numbers, and diet" plan.

 

[FyrFytr998]

11. The social media attention whore plan w/ post per minutes incentives.

 

[Thunderflash500]

The I squat to parallel (as if that is so hard) and act better than everyone because I do, even though I'm fat and not even strong plan. Same price as the I mock people for being in great shape plan and for bodybuilding to protect my own ego plan.

I'm not mocking people on this site for caring about sports performance. I just find these people obnoxious in real life when they don't play sports and sit their judging people. They are almost always fat or really skinny. I don't get it. There's a few people at my gym always talking shit on people who lift for aesthetics.