Another question for Hillary

Thanks, Hillary. Your words of encouragement really help me out a lot. I'm a small female blue belt and the only girl who trains at my gym. Sometimes I look down at the many bruises on my legs and get so discouraged. I occasionally still get tapped out by some of the bigger white belts in my gym, but that's not really what gets me down. Feeling like my top game and my take downs are suffering because of the big weight difference between my partners and I kinda gets me down. When I compete against other women I do very well and it builds my confidence, but training against men in the gym is always a big challenge. I really look up to you as an accomplished female black belt. You give little girls like me proof that it can be done. I love the quote in your signature too. It sums up how I feel on those rough days.
 
My question is how hard should a guy roll when he is rolling with females? Typically I always try to be as technical as possible. If someone tries to out muscle me I respond with technique and then as much muscle as I need. I just don't want to be the guy that uses all muscle all the time.
 
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