Relationships Amicably divorced couples

[SleepyBoy]

I'm cool with all my exs, although I'm glad they're someone else's problem.

I could meet anyone of them tomorrow and have a nice civil time.

 

[4daLuLZ]

Yeah. Husband and his ex wife had an amicable break up, it just ended. No financial arguments, we met when he was marrying her, but they haven't been in touch in 18 or so years other than legally, because why?

I'm still very good friends with an ex, but he lives in another country. I love him. Ran into some issues a couple of years ago and he did like a 9 hour round trip because he didn't want me having to worry about two big suitcases and a roll along on a train. So he came and collected me then delivered me to my mother, I will never forget that. I value his friendship far more than any sexual thing we had. When we first saw each other after a couple of years when I was back in London and we hugged, we both cried.

 

[fingercuffs]

I'm still sort of friends with my ex of nine years. Granted we were never married. Before I moved here 2.5 years ago, we still hung out with mutual friends from time to time even when she was dating someone else and they were around too. I didn't care.

I still talk to her from time to time now and ask how she's doing and we talk about what's going on each other lives.

Thing is we met when she was 19 and I was 26. After about five or six years we both started changing and grew apart in a romantic sense. We made great roommates and friends but we just kind of moved on emotionally. We really just stayed together out of convenience as she was working a lot and going to grad school and I was off doing my own thing most of the time.

It ended with us cheating on each other but it was probably the best thing that ever happened because it was the catalyst that caused us to finally break up. I harbor no resentment or anger toward her. It just wasn't meant to be. I still wish the best for her and her happiness. She's living with some guy now that's good for her and she deserves it.

With the guy this person keeps slagging me off about, I was single when he came and got me. We didn't even go for it then even though he picked me up from a hotel car park and we didn't have a deadline of where to be. He just took me to my mother's we hugged, said "I love you" and he drove home.

Gotta agree w that. No disrespect but based on her other threads/comments, there just seems to be a lot of confusion and delusions with her. I just don't get the happy and fulfilled vibe from her. She's still looking for something...

How on earth am I going to be happy and fulfilled right now? The world has gone mad and my last 2 years have been absolute hell. Like nothing I could ever think I could go through and come out the other side alive if someone suggested it to me. If I have day dreams about fucking other people like the flirt work thread you're being an old woman about it. Where the fuck is the issue with that? Are you all monks? Again, I haven't seen him since 2018. And you're flippin liars if you don't say you don't day dream, in your head, about fucking other people. I'm just honest about it.

 

[HunterAcosta]

Never understood it 100. I mean ...you like to talk to each other still and some still hang out AND you’ve tasted each other’s juices . Sounds like sex + friendship = chemistry (?) . Unless sex was the thing that broke up the relationship . I’m not friends with any of my serious exes ( mostly by their doing ) Cept fir one short term fuck buddy I had 25 years ago but we see each other once a year fir lunch . It’s dangerous ground imo to be short friendly cool kicking it with exes imo and beware any chick who does in my experience .

 

[DaleBoca]

Just like Kevin Arnold and Winnie Cooper.

Yeah. That made no sense to me. She picked up Winnie from the airport with his wife? They were writing to each other through the years? Lol, like that ever happens in real life.

 

[Streeter]

Been divorced for 10 years. Always been friendly with my ex as we got 2 kids. Were not friends but definitely friendly when around each other.

Having hate for anyone just does no good.

 

[Nabs]

With the guy this person keeps slagging me off about, I was single when he came and got me. We didn't even go for it then even though he picked me up from a hotel car park and we didn't have a deadline of where to be. He just took me to my mother's we hugged, said "I love you" and he drove home.

How on earth am I going to be happy and fulfilled right now? The world has gone mad and my last 2 years have been absolute hell. Like nothing I could ever think I could go through and come out the other side alive if someone suggested it to me. If I have day dreams about fucking other people like the flirt work thread you're being an old woman about it. Where the fuck is the issue with that? Are you all monks? Again, I haven't seen him since 2018. And you're flippin liars if you don't say you don't day dream, in your head, about fucking other people. I'm just honest about it.

First of all, I'm sorry about whatever happened to you for the past 2 years. I dunno if it's the cancer you referred to earlier but having a mother who went through that before, I truly empathize with you and hope you've recovered fully and never have to deal w it again.

Never having been married I may be speaking out of naivety, but what I do know for FACTS is that I would NOT stay married if I felt like I had feelings/ideas about other people at every turn. As I said before, being in a relationship doesn't mean that you can't appreciate and admire other people. Even a little fantasizing that never stays in your head is ok in my book. The moment you CONSTANTLY talk about how hot so and so is, and actually engage, you've crossed the line. All that flirting is emotional cheating in my book. If you wouldn't mind your husband do that w other women then it's all good. You're just a different kind of person. I'm very secure and not the jealous kind, but I wouldn't want to be committed to a woman who stays flirting and fantasizing about other dudes. Just not my cup of tea at all.

I love one of my exes. We still chat here and there, but I respect her relationship. She's the only woman I miss sexually and I've had a couple of opportunities to take advantage of a vulnerable time in her new relationship. I don't know her man but I respect his relationship. I don't say or do anything to/with her that I wouldn't want somebody to do to/with someone who I was in a relationship with. The fact that she respects herself and her relationship as well makes it easy. We are great friends, we love each other, but we keep our distances and never cross the line. It's not about control or jealousy. It's about respect and treating people the way you would want them to treat you. Simple as that. I think that people are so selfish and narcissistic today that it's hard for them to realize that.

My opinion of you is just what it is. An opinion. I don't know you and only formed my opinion by reading your posts and seeing a similar thread in them. Only you know the truth. It is what it is.

 

[fingercuffs]

First of all, I'm sorry about whatever happened to you for the past 2 years. I dunno if it's the cancer you referred to earlier but having a mother who went through that before, I truly empathize with you and hope you've recovered fully and never have to deal w it again.

Never having been married I may be speaking out of naivety, but what I do know for FACTS is that I would NOT stay married if I felt like I had feelings/ideas about other people at every turn. As I said before, being in a relationship doesn't mean that you can't appreciate and admire other people. Even a little fantasizing that never stays in your head is ok in my book. The moment you CONSTANTLY talk about how hot so and so is, and actually engage, you've crossed the line. All that flirting is emotional cheating in my book. If you wouldn't mind your husband do that w other women then it's all good. You're just a different kind of person. I'm very secure and not the jealous kind, but I wouldn't want to be committed to a woman who stays flirting and fantasizing about other dudes. Just not my cup of tea at all.

I love one of my exes. We still chat here and there, but I respect her relationship. She's the only woman I miss sexually and I've had a couple of opportunities to take advantage of a vulnerable time in her new relationship. I don't know her man but I respect his relationship. I don't say or do anything to/with her that I wouldn't want somebody to do to/with someone who I was in a relationship with. The fact that she respects herself and her relationship as well makes it easy. We are great friends, we love each other, but we keep our distances and never cross the line. It's not about control or jealousy. It's about respect and treating people the way you would want them to treat you. Simple as that. I think that people are so selfish and narcissistic today that it's hard for them to realize that.

My opinion of you is just what it is. An opinion. I don't know you and only formed my opinion by reading your posts and seeing a similar thread in them. Only you know the truth. It is what it is.

My cancer and his cancer, with my mother dying of cancer at the exact same time brought us both closer together. I find it's strange that a spouse wouldn't find it be nice to have a source of support when she's going through breast cancer. What sort of selfish bastard would do that? Especially while she died 5 days before my surgery, and I couldn't even go to the UK to the funeral?

This calling my husband weak is really, so the opposite.

Sozzles, his cancer was years before. Why on on earth I'n not allowed to be friends with him, y'all are flippin weird.

If I hadn't had a text from 2 friends before I went under the knife I would have been really upset. And had I not had the samw when I woke up, the same.

 

[Nabs]

My cancer and his cancer, with my mother dying of cancer at the exact same time brought us both closer together. I find it's strange that a spouse wouldn't find it be nice to have a source of support when she's going through breast cancer. What sort of selfish bastard would do that? Especially while she died 5 days before my surgery, and I couldn't even go to the UK to the funeral?

This calling my husband weak is really, so the opposite.

Sozzles, his cancer was years before. Why on on earth I'n not allowed to be friends with him, y'all are flippin weird.

If I hadn't had a text from 2 friends before I went under the knife I would have been really upset. And had I not had the samw when I woke up, the same.

I understand. You also have to see where most of us come from not knowing all these facts you just laid out.

 

[fingercuffs]

I understand. You also have to see where most of us come from not knowing all these facts you just laid out.

Yeah I get it. Not everyone gets and likes who I am. Understandably.

 

[C0NCH3TO]

For some reason I can’t be friends with an ex gf... it’s better that way. Parents argued a lot when they were married, they are good friends now.

 

[ultimateriley-o]

What was the breaking point? I assume she wasn't banging your brother or something otherwise you probably wouldn't still be friends.

We were living in Toronto at the time. She was getting more emotionally distant, and I was getting more physically distant in response, spending more time at jiu jitsu and the gym. One night we had an honest conversation about it where she told me she wanted to move back to Florida where she was originally from, and didn't want to be married to anyone anymore. I was hurt, but unsurprised. Shortly after she left, I realized the hurt was mostly my ego at having been left, not that I wanted to still be with her and couldn't be. Doesn't do me any good to demonize her or hate her when my life is actually a lot better now.

 

[FyrFytr998]

For the brief time my wife and I divorced, we remained friends and even talked with each other about who we were dating. Then we started banging again and ultimately reconciled. 17 years strong on the second go round.

 

[Wrath of Foamy]

I don't see myself being friends with my ex's, though, depending on their attitude towards me, I'd be civil with them.

They are not responsible for how I act.

 

[Gandulf]

I used to be in a relationship with a woman I really liked, but we realised we were both moving into a different direction, and we broke up. We still remain friends, we still talk and go for dinner from time to time.

 

[Gutter Chris]

The concept of people who are divorced who remain friendly with each other is just so weird to me. I don't mean the "we have kids together so I'll tolerate you" types, but the types that still seem happy and there is no resentment, sometimes are close friends.

Breaking what was intended to be a life-long commitment doesn't seem like something to take lightly so I imagine divorces are generally nasty due to things like infidelity, abuse, disrespect, financial strife, or otherwise people just getting sick and tired of each other. It's hard to imagine people who don't hate each other's guts deciding "let's not do this anymore."

I was watching 90 Day Fiance, there's this rich guy who married some young Brazilian model. He and his ex-wife are like best buds and talk all the time. I thought it would've been impossible to see your ex-husband with a new woman and not get at least a little bit resentful; it's female nature... hell, it's human nature even. But nope! The ex-wife was so cool with the new girl, treated her like a little sister... EVEN OFFICIATED THEIR WEDDING!

I'm noticing more shows and movies with this theme, like Ant Man for example (and others I can't think of). I can't complain though it beats the same cliche story that's been written a million times of a fuck up dad, bitchy ex-wife with custody of the kids who marries some Gary Stu lawyer/doctor who the main character hates.

Do you know anyone who is very friendly with their ex? Are you? What's the situaton?

It is my opinion you were never in love in the first place if a breakup does not involve a lot of hurt feelings anger and blame. But I know couples that both discover that no they are not truly in love like that and thus the no hard feelings breakups

 

[fingercuffs]

For the brief time my wife and I divorced, we remained friends and even talked with each other about who we were dating. Then we started banging again and ultimately reconciled. 17 years strong on the second go round.

That's sweet to hear.

 

[FyrFytr998]

That's sweet to hear.

A tale as old as time.........

 

[Threetrees]

Can’t be friends with an ex without secretly wanting to put it in their pooper imho