What are your thoughts about bullied kids committing suicide?

[TheGreatA]

It depends on the circumstances. While I do not advocate excessive bullying, I also do not advocate people committing suicide for relatively miniscule reasons.

I've gone through all of the "all-male" institutions (sports teams, military, etc.) where bullying can be more or less prevalent. Yet I never encountered anything outside of the usual light harassment/testing of one's manhood. There's a place for that, at the end of the day, because you're trying to forge a team that can survive together even under difficult/stressful circumstances. A person who can't handle being poked fun at, is unlikely to be able to handle a grenade being thrown at him, or being 2 goals down in a tournament final.

The people who can't handle stress or pressure, should do what they can, to avoid putting themselves in such situations. At the end of the day, we can't build the society to fully accommodate its weakest elements. Sometimes, such people ought to attempt to be more understanding of why they are actually being criticized, and strive to critically evaluate why other people constantly get mad at them.

It's a complex issue, and there are certainly times where weakness of an individual is not so much the problem, but rather the cruelty of the collective. Some people just have their soul and self-esteem crushed from the beginning to the end, and never get to develop any kind of a stronger, healthier identity. That is wrong, in every sense, and I'm certainly not an apologist for that.

I have no real problem with occasional harassment if the harassment is intended to empower the harassed person, and change him for the better. Sometimes you need to call people out for what they are, fat, lazy, indecisive, apathetic, and so forth. It cannot always be done kindly. I've certainly been called out for perceived weakness many times, and I've always used that as a fuel to change for the better, instead of collapsing under the weight of the insult (which in reality needs to be looked at as a criticism).

 

[AnGrYcRoW]

Couldn't have said it better myself.
We have to be involved in our kids lives a bit more nowadays.
-Talking with them through their various daily interactions and conflicts should help them understand confrontations with peers and develop their backbone.

I also want to teach my kid to be a bit physically tough as well, it does tremendous help when coupled with verbal wit/intelligence.

Physics (ability to transfer force a.k.a. fight) is always important.

My son just got his blue belt in aikido , his core strength is off the charts for a 10 year old lol

 

[Gregolian]

My son just got his blue belt in aikido , his core strength is off the charts for a 10 year old lol

Why Aikido instead of like Judo? My old uncle did judo and moved to aikido as his joints got fucked up.

 

[BillytheFish]

Bad parenting. These kids these days a Fucking scared of everything and can’t do a fucking thing on their own. It’s pathetic. Social media is also killing this society. The dumbing down of America.

You sound old.

 

[AnGrYcRoW]

Why Aikido instead of like Judo? My old uncle did judo and moved to aikido as his joints got fucked up.

Friends had their kids in it and a terrific family runs it , my son is a bear to wrestle, I would love to put him in bjj , may at some point

 

[Gregolian]

Friends had their kids in it and a terrific family runs it , my son is a bear to wrestle, I would love to put him in bjj , may at some point

If I ever end up with a son I am going to try and push him to do freestyle or greco wrestling until he hits high school at the very least. At that stage he can keep doing it if he wants or quit.

 

[ManCityFC9]

My son just got his blue belt in aikido , his core strength is off the charts for a 10 year old lol

That's good.
Physical competition does wonder for the psyche; I bet he's faced adversity through tougher opponents, discipline from practicing aikido, etc.... all good things.

 

[wonderbread]

You sound old.

40s

And compared to when I was a teen? These teens and millenials are pathetically helpless.

 

[AnGrYcRoW]

40s

And compared to when I was a teen? These teens and millenials are pathetically helpless.

Some are but some are way ahead of where we were , I'm a broken record but it all comes down to parenting

 

[AnGrYcRoW]

If I ever end up with a son I am going to try and push him to do freestyle or greco wrestling until he hits high school at the very least. At that stage he can keep doing it if he wants or quit.

Taylor your parenting to your kid , don't force a square peg into a round hole , I like wrestling and the like because it's an individual sport with a team aspect , best of both worlds

 

[Gregolian]

Taylor your parenting to your kid , don't force a square peg into a round hole , I like wrestling and the like because it's an individual sport with a team aspect , best of both worlds

Don't have a kid or even a significant other right now but that individual while still being on a team thing is what I wish I had growing up.

Shit like baseball can be fun as a kid but when shit goes wrong it's easy to blame other people.

 

[AnGrYcRoW]

Don't have a kid or even a significant other right now but that individual while still being on a team thing is what I wish I had growing up.

Shit like baseball can be fun as a kid but when shit goes wrong it's easy to blame other people.

Exactly, also more likely to have to deal with shit head parents and or the progeny of shit heads

 

[Gregolian]

Exactly, also more likely to have to deal with shit head parents and or the progeny of shit heads

This vid always sticks out for me.

I played baseball as a kid and really regret not having kept doing it in high school cause I was a pretty damn good catcher. Not MLB level or even college level most likely but still.

Wrestling though, is that one sport where your greatest opponent is yourself. Boxing, kickboxing, and shit is similar but there's a ton more risk of permanent injury there, especially head injuries.

 

[GearSolidMetal]

Ya'll remember that comedy bit by George Carlin about soldiers in WW1 had 'Shellshock,' and over decades it was dwindled down to 'Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder?'

I think 'Bullying' is the exact opposite. We've all been bullied a bit, and we got over it and it even toughened us up, and taught us to defend ourselves verbally and fight back.

That's simple 'Bullying.' But what some kids are victims of should be more specifically classified as ''Deliberate Emotional Torment,' because it can emasculate a person, make them a social outcast, and throw them into deep depression and eventually suicide.

 

[wonderbread]

Some are but some are way ahead of where we were , I'm a broken record but it all comes down to parenting

Oh, I agree...and I agree that it's parenting. Some of the "harsh" things my Father did...which I did not think were that harsh... and they made me think about what I did, and respect authority....these things these days are considered torture and WRONG. This is why a majority of kids now are so wishy washy and helplessly scared of life. The pussification of America.

 

[AnGrYcRoW]

I remember back in grade 8 moving and transferring to a new school , I was being a shit head in the locker room and making fun of some geeky kid , this one kid Sean Jones everybody called him juice , he was huge , probably 6' 180 in grade 8 , he snaps grabs and throws me out of the locker room like a sack of potatoes and throws my clothes out after me , i moved again that summer so I didn't see him again til years later , maybe a year after high school , and he starts to apologize , I stopped him and told him what he did was fucking awesome and that he did the right thing .

I've told my son that story and have been coaching him since kindergarten to be like that guy and to intervene if he can , some of proudest moments as a parent are the times when my son comes home and tells me how he stuck up for someone ....awesome feeling .

 

[Kanuck99]

outside of violence, bullys are nothing more than rude truth tellers.

people who get bullied cant figure out how to make up for the flaw that is thier target.

You can either nerf emotions so they dont mean anything, or work to rise above it.


Where is the proof of this taking place? maybe the kid wasnt gay but the insult rang true because he was socially inept.

You are a stupid monkey fucker! There I said it so it must be true. I'm not a bully, just a rude truth teller.

 

[Social Distance Warrior]

How so?

The words wouldnt mean anything to the victim if the victim didnt agree with the bully on some level.

Its usually things that are so true that the victim doesnt have the ability to disagree outside of living a lie.

That doesnt make it ok to militarize the truth, but action (ultimately self improvement) on part of the victim becomes mandatory.

Sorry brother, but I have to respectfully disagree with this notion.

This isn’t an instance of “the truth hurts don’t it? You’re just upset because it rings true!!”

I mean, this might remotely apply to picking on a kid for being fat, having bad acne and other physical appearances, but more often than not, it’s about tormenting the victim…inflicting as much emotional anguish as possible.

And frankly, either way, bullying is incredibly fu*ked up. Often, victims of bullying are tormented for things they cannot help, such as their race, ethnic background, looks they were born with, things they cannot help.

A child should never be made to feel humiliated, ugly, disgusting, stupid etc.

Quick personal story, in 4th grade, I helped the “cool kids” bully a classmate with down syndrome. (probably the most shameful thing I’ve ever done in my life). This kid felt like shit, because we were cruel pieces of $hit. We picked a vulnerability, something that made this kid different .

The onus of condemnation/scorn/castigation shouldn’t be on the victim of bullying (well, if it weren’t true, why would he be offended??), the onus should be on bullies.

 

[BillytheFish]

40s

And compared to when I was a teen? These teens and millenials are pathetically helpless.

Millenials cover the period of people born from 1982 to 1999. 2001 Afghanistan kicked off, 2003 Iraq. Millenials doing back to back tours for the last 17 years. How many tours have you got under your belt there?

People from your age group made low downpayments on homes, pretty much to blame for the recession...causing millenials to live at home longer with their parents ie you guys. You can't as a generation fuck over the next generation financially then blame them for relying more on family for support.

 

[usmctanker242]

Opinions on bullying generally boil down to the Third Person Effect. We're all worried that a lack of bullying will somehow prevent other people's children from becoming emotionally strong and physically tough, yet each of us carries the opinion that we experienced or witnessed enough bullying as children that we do not personally suffer from the ailment.

How about we just stop enabling bullies instead of bullshitting ourselves.

This is the big problem... HOW do you stop bullying? Best solution would be to allow kids to fight in school. I was a fat ginger kid with big ears and I got bullied to hell and back. Only reason I didn't do anything about it was because I would get kicked out of school. 3 fights in a year and you were expelled (public school) regardless of the situation. So kids who weren't willing to get in trouble were fresh meat for bullies and it was always open season. I don't think teachers or school security can really do anything about it... it's going to happen but they have effectively removed any tool a child has against bullying. This is why kids get desperate and make long term solutions to short term problems, ie suicide or even shooting the bullies.