I'm losing the love of my life

Tuvatuva said:
This is bad advice. His bet is to wish her goodluck and move on. Let her go with love. There are plenty of other chicks out there.
This story is typical. A man thinks he met the woman of his life, gets fully committed, and reasons unbeknownst to him (and likely even to herself), the relationship becomes distant. This is due to the hypergamous nature of women. She thinks she can do better. She's not happy with you because women are never happy in serious committed relationships. She wants to break up still keep in contact because she doesn't want to lose what she already had with you but still wants to keep her options open. Pretty much every woman I've been with wanted to maintain contact after breaking up. I'd rather just move on and keep going, but women are opportunistic with their options for male attention.
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This might be his only chance at finding something to love that’s real and not just failed hopes and a dirty sock.
 
RoastBeast said:
You said you demanded she stop her withdrawal without fully comprehending what was bothering her.

What was bothering her that caused the withdrawal?
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I mean, he was trying to force-fuck her. Which women wouldn't love to be with such a great guy?!
 
Ballsaque said:
So, sob story incoming:
In the heart of a bustling city, I met a girl. She was French, and her culture are very different to my own. Our connection grew swiftly, moving from a dates to cohabiting in what felt like the blink of an eye.

She had a strong character and principles that fascinated me. It was her unwavering beliefs and sense of self that attracted me to her. As I got to know her better, I realized that her unique perspective on life was something I admired. We both had a shared vision of building a future together, and our bond made me certain that she was the one I wanted to marry.
We also became business partners, founding companies together. We believed in our shared dreams and thought we could make something extraordinary together.
However, over time, there was a shift in our relationship. Our intimacy, once a deep and passionate connection started to vein. I was working a lot, and when we were home, we were "together without being togeher." I take full responsibility for that. But we grew distant, our once sex life and intimacy dwindled to almost nothing.
I thought we could overcome this challenge, but as weeks turned into months, the gap between us grew wider. I could no longer ignore the growing distance. Frustration and confusion began to eat away at me, and I made the mistake of trying to force a solution. I didn't understand her point of view, and I demanded that she stop her withdrawal, without fully comprehending what was bothering her.
I have always told her I would marry her and we would have children, but I kept saying not before this barrier between us was overcome.
Tensions mounted, and we had our share of heated arguments during this time. The breaking point came during a particularly intense argument. We were at a concert, and could barely hug or talk to each other. I told her I was leaving and I couldnt do this anymore.
She moved out to live somewhere else for now. I know this has been eating away at her, she has lost a lot of weight lately.
We met, and she expressed that she wanted to try to 'break up' and then keep the contact to see if we can regain the spark. As in, we wouldnt not be seeing other people, but have some distance from each other for some time. That is obviously a very painful arrangement. But I have respected and honoured it so far, only checking in with her rarely and sending her pictures of our cat. I believe I have to let her have space for now (When we blew up at each other in the past, it could take me 3 hours to get fine again, and her 3 days. That is how she functions.)
I believe that we "lost" the spark, because we moved in with each other too quickly, and we both took each other for granted, because we had a feeling early on that it was us agains the world.
I have throught deeply about this, and I am sure my behaviour has pushed her away. I have taken her, and our intimacy for granted. This girl is the real deal, and I intend to remedy the situaiton and marry her. Everyone is pales in comparison to her.

I dont know why I wrote all this, but perhaps my Sherbrehs can lend some advice. My strategy for now is to respect the arrangement. When the time is right, I will invite her out again, with the mindset that I am meeting her for the first time.

Inb4 youre a oneitis bitch, shes piping someone else, did she at least get you and ipad, etc.
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Stop simping. You’re a Sherdogger, goddamnit. Sack up.
 
Ballsaque said:
Ja. Mange og dybe. Men jeg tror ikke det er tid til samtaler mere. Der må holdes noget distance for nu.
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Det er fair nok, det var mere fordi du nævnte at du var uforstående. Men ja, der kommer et tidspunkt hvor det ikke hjælper at tale sammen mere og hvor afstand, og ro, er det bedste. Har været der selv er par gange. Håber i finder ud af det, men hvis ikke, så skal det nok også gå. Prioriter dig selv og dit velbefindende mate. Take care.
 
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Don't get back with women who have discarded you once before. They are not taking you back for rational reasons, because they have changed or because they think you have become better.

They are taking you back because there are no better immediate options and they are more risk adverse than males. Safety nets are important to them.

When she finds another better male option their emotions take over, rationally goes out the window, and so will you.
 
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Sano said:
Det er fair nok, det var mere fordi du nævnte at du var uforstående. Men ja, der kommer et tidspunkt hvor det ikke hjælper at tale sammen mere og hvor afstand, og ro, er det bedste. Har været der selv er par gange. Håber i finder ud af det, men hvis ikke, så skal det nok også gå. Prioriter dig selv og dit velbefindende mate. Take care.
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Det var nok også forkert formuleret. Takker for tanken.
 
She is losing weight doesn't mean she is sad. She might be trying to make change and get hot.
 
pinger said:
Don't get back with women who have discarded you once before. They are not taking you back for rational reasons, because they have changed or because they think you have become better.

They are taking you back because there are no better immediate options and they are more risk adverse than males. Safety nets are important to them.

When she finds another better male option their emotions take over, rationally goes out the window, and so will you.
Click to expand...
Yes I agree, but not just women. When the man or woman wants to have distance and see if the sparkle is still there, then you better move forward. The sparkle with someone new will always be bigger in the beginning and if this is what they look for you will never win.

If the distance would be because you treat her bad, or because some other reason that should be corrected, it would be different, but against the lost sparkle you will never win.
 
Ballsaque said:
So, sob story incoming:
In the heart of a bustling city, I met a girl. She was French, and her culture are very different to my own. Our connection grew swiftly, moving from a dates to cohabiting in what felt like the blink of an eye.

She had a strong character and principles that fascinated me. It was her unwavering beliefs and sense of self that attracted me to her. As I got to know her better, I realized that her unique perspective on life was something I admired. We both had a shared vision of building a future together, and our bond made me certain that she was the one I wanted to marry.
We also became business partners, founding companies together. We believed in our shared dreams and thought we could make something extraordinary together.
However, over time, there was a shift in our relationship. Our intimacy, once a deep and passionate connection started to vein. I was working a lot, and when we were home, we were "together without being togeher." I take full responsibility for that. But we grew distant, our once sex life and intimacy dwindled to almost nothing.
I thought we could overcome this challenge, but as weeks turned into months, the gap between us grew wider. I could no longer ignore the growing distance. Frustration and confusion began to eat away at me, and I made the mistake of trying to force a solution. I didn't understand her point of view, and I demanded that she stop her withdrawal, without fully comprehending what was bothering her.
I have always told her I would marry her and we would have children, but I kept saying not before this barrier between us was overcome.
Tensions mounted, and we had our share of heated arguments during this time. The breaking point came during a particularly intense argument. We were at a concert, and could barely hug or talk to each other. I told her I was leaving and I couldnt do this anymore.
She moved out to live somewhere else for now. I know this has been eating away at her, she has lost a lot of weight lately.
We met, and she expressed that she wanted to try to 'break up' and then keep the contact to see if we can regain the spark. As in, we wouldnt not be seeing other people, but have some distance from each other for some time. That is obviously a very painful arrangement. But I have respected and honoured it so far, only checking in with her rarely and sending her pictures of our cat. I believe I have to let her have space for now (When we blew up at each other in the past, it could take me 3 hours to get fine again, and her 3 days. That is how she functions.)
I believe that we "lost" the spark, because we moved in with each other too quickly, and we both took each other for granted, because we had a feeling early on that it was us agains the world.
I have throught deeply about this, and I am sure my behaviour has pushed her away. I have taken her, and our intimacy for granted. This girl is the real deal, and I intend to remedy the situaiton and marry her. Everyone is pales in comparison to her.

I dont know why I wrote all this, but perhaps my Sherbrehs can lend some advice. My strategy for now is to respect the arrangement. When the time is right, I will invite her out again, with the mindset that I am meeting her for the first time.

Inb4 youre a oneitis bitch, shes piping someone else, did she at least get you and ipad, etc.
Click to expand...
Brother. She leaves because you spend all time typing this poop shits on the internet like idiot.
 
Ballsaque said:
So, sob story incoming:
In the heart of a bustling city, I met a girl. She was French, and her culture are very different to my own. Our connection grew swiftly, moving from a dates to cohabiting in what felt like the blink of an eye.

She had a strong character and principles that fascinated me. It was her unwavering beliefs and sense of self that attracted me to her. As I got to know her better, I realized that her unique perspective on life was something I admired. We both had a shared vision of building a future together, and our bond made me certain that she was the one I wanted to marry.
We also became business partners, founding companies together. We believed in our shared dreams and thought we could make something extraordinary together.
However, over time, there was a shift in our relationship. Our intimacy, once a deep and passionate connection started to vein. I was working a lot, and when we were home, we were "together without being togeher." I take full responsibility for that. But we grew distant, our once sex life and intimacy dwindled to almost nothing.
I thought we could overcome this challenge, but as weeks turned into months, the gap between us grew wider. I could no longer ignore the growing distance. Frustration and confusion began to eat away at me, and I made the mistake of trying to force a solution. I didn't understand her point of view, and I demanded that she stop her withdrawal, without fully comprehending what was bothering her.
I have always told her I would marry her and we would have children, but I kept saying not before this barrier between us was overcome.
Tensions mounted, and we had our share of heated arguments during this time. The breaking point came during a particularly intense argument. We were at a concert, and could barely hug or talk to each other. I told her I was leaving and I couldnt do this anymore.
She moved out to live somewhere else for now. I know this has been eating away at her, she has lost a lot of weight lately.
We met, and she expressed that she wanted to try to 'break up' and then keep the contact to see if we can regain the spark. As in, we wouldnt not be seeing other people, but have some distance from each other for some time. That is obviously a very painful arrangement. But I have respected and honoured it so far, only checking in with her rarely and sending her pictures of our cat. I believe I have to let her have space for now (When we blew up at each other in the past, it could take me 3 hours to get fine again, and her 3 days. That is how she functions.)
I believe that we "lost" the spark, because we moved in with each other too quickly, and we both took each other for granted, because we had a feeling early on that it was us agains the world.
I have throught deeply about this, and I am sure my behaviour has pushed her away. I have taken her, and our intimacy for granted. This girl is the real deal, and I intend to remedy the situaiton and marry her. Everyone is pales in comparison to her.

I dont know why I wrote all this, but perhaps my Sherbrehs can lend some advice. My strategy for now is to respect the arrangement. When the time is right, I will invite her out again, with the mindset that I am meeting her for the first time.

Inb4 youre a oneitis bitch, shes piping someone else, did she at least get you and ipad, etc.
Click to expand...

You already tried cohabitating and that didn’t work out, but you think marrying her will be different? No dice my guy. That bait ‘n switch was in full effect. Now you know.

Move on and never look back. Absolutely zero contact. If she texts say give me a call. If she calls ask her to come over and make dinner together. If she’s iffy about those plans then walk away and never look back. Allow her to do 100% of the chasing. Allow her the freedom to take it or leave it.
 
Dogshare said:
Yes I agree, but not just women. When the man or woman wants to have distance and see if the sparkle is still there, then you better move forward. The sparkle with someone new will always be bigger in the beginning and if this is what they look for you will never win.

If the distance would be because you treat her bad, or because some other reason that should be corrected, it would be different, but against the lost sparkle you will never win.
Click to expand...
The phenomena is called limerence
 
you should impregnate her, to preove your masculinity. it would be funny. do it for sherdog

use your ding dong for what its made for or cut it off and throw it away!
 
It sucks, but it's over, turn over a new leaf as soon as you can.

When women reach the point where they've given up on you, it's done. It's clear she's past that threshold.

Good luck in your next relationship.
 
She probably lost a lot of weight from all the sex she has been having while you post on sherdog
 
i just read a whole lot of nothing. can you give actual details?

and pics of sad girl.
 
emefer said:
This might be his only chance at finding something to love that’s real and not just failed hopes and a dirty sock.
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What is "real?" What is real about constant fighting and lack of sex and emotional distance as the OP described?
And why is it his only chance? I hate this soppy romantic bullshit. It encourages men to be simps.
A woman should not be the focus of a man's life. Focus on a greater purpose and better women will come into your life.
 
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