- Joined
- Jul 4, 2022
- Messages
- 401
- Reaction score
- 255
I never had much of an adult relationship with my parents, mostly as I was not living near them or was busy or pre-occupied with other things.
Last 6 months or so, it's really occurred to me they're getting old, mid-70's, I can see some signs of age related decline happening, and I've really tried to be more engaging and spend more time with them.
What I've found is, they're not really that interested.
They kind of humored me initially, then just lost patience and kind of told me to quit bothering them.
They're happy enough to have me around for dinner once a week; well, my mother is. I'm pretty sure the old man is largely indifferent.
But I was trying to bring them for nice walks, encouraging some gentle activities we could do together....... so we could spend that time, before they die, basically.
They just end up seeming exasperated and not bothered.
........
Seems kind of weird as when I was younger, they always complained I didn't stay in contact enough.
I'm not sure if it's aging that makes them lack motivation to engage with me, or in actual fact they were never really super enthusiastic about spending time with me or having me around much in the first place.
Looking back, as a kid and teenager, young adult etc., my father talked a good game and always provided, but yeah I mean he used to actively dodge me or avoid having to do activities with me during those years.
Who knows.
Just feels like of lame my parents are going to die without me ever having really known them or had a proper adult relationship with them, spending quality time together etc.
I never imagined that would happened; i.e. I always thought it would happen eventually, that we'd form that kind of communicative bond.
But as prior, they really don't seem to be bothered.
Last 6 months or so, it's really occurred to me they're getting old, mid-70's, I can see some signs of age related decline happening, and I've really tried to be more engaging and spend more time with them.
What I've found is, they're not really that interested.
They kind of humored me initially, then just lost patience and kind of told me to quit bothering them.
They're happy enough to have me around for dinner once a week; well, my mother is. I'm pretty sure the old man is largely indifferent.
But I was trying to bring them for nice walks, encouraging some gentle activities we could do together....... so we could spend that time, before they die, basically.
They just end up seeming exasperated and not bothered.
........
Seems kind of weird as when I was younger, they always complained I didn't stay in contact enough.
I'm not sure if it's aging that makes them lack motivation to engage with me, or in actual fact they were never really super enthusiastic about spending time with me or having me around much in the first place.
Looking back, as a kid and teenager, young adult etc., my father talked a good game and always provided, but yeah I mean he used to actively dodge me or avoid having to do activities with me during those years.
Who knows.
Just feels like of lame my parents are going to die without me ever having really known them or had a proper adult relationship with them, spending quality time together etc.
I never imagined that would happened; i.e. I always thought it would happen eventually, that we'd form that kind of communicative bond.
But as prior, they really don't seem to be bothered.
