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- Mar 6, 2002
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Back in February of 2013 I had my first spell of intense anxiety; which manifested primarily in the form of insomnia and then a profound fear of being unable to sleep at all (which further perpetuated the insomnia).
There were other symptoms too (heart racing, mind racing, constant dizziness, no appetite.... and others), but the sleep issue scared me the most. I could go a week with getting little more than 3 1/2 hours for the entire week.
So I'm working at Chase Bank and slowly becoming convinced that I'm going to have to quit my job.
I had a call with the employee assistance line and from that call they rocketed me all the way up to the main guy in that department. A well established psychologist who studied at top universities and graduated with honors.
I get my first call scheduled with him and I'm getting excited thinking he'll be able to crack this or at least shed some light on the issue.
My first call and I explain the whole situation. All he advised for me to do on that first call was to try something called 4 Square Breathing.
Breathe in for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds.... repeat.
That was about it for the first call. We scheduled another call for 3 days later and I'm thinking he's going to go over the notes he wrote down, then on the next call he'll ask some more questions, and then help me to start chipping away at this.
3 days later and I still feel like shit (hopeless, full of despair, exhausted, unable to sleep).... he calls me at the scheduled time for the second call and he sounds all chipper and excited to hear how I was doing.
"So! Are you doing any better??!"
"Not much if any."
Doctor: "Haven't you been doing the 4 Square Breathing?"
Me: "Well sure, but it hasn't cleared up the issue. Wait... is that it?! Just a breathing exercise to clear up all of this??!"
Doctor: "No, no, no.... we have other things we can try also."
Me: (relieved but wary) "Great... what else can I do?"
Doctor: "Let's increase it to a 5 Square Breathing exercise."
(I actually thought this fucker was making fun of me at this point. Usually I'm much more reserved and not one to lash out at an honest attempt at helping.)
Me: "One extra second of breathing??!! That's your advice?! Haven't you read over the notes from our first meeting??"
Doctor: "Notes?"
Me: "I gotta go"
That was the head honcho of the employee assistance department for mental health issues.
From there I started seeing a litany of psychologists and psychiatrists with little improvement on Doctor Breathie's Breath Treatment.
There were other symptoms too (heart racing, mind racing, constant dizziness, no appetite.... and others), but the sleep issue scared me the most. I could go a week with getting little more than 3 1/2 hours for the entire week.
So I'm working at Chase Bank and slowly becoming convinced that I'm going to have to quit my job.
I had a call with the employee assistance line and from that call they rocketed me all the way up to the main guy in that department. A well established psychologist who studied at top universities and graduated with honors.
I get my first call scheduled with him and I'm getting excited thinking he'll be able to crack this or at least shed some light on the issue.
My first call and I explain the whole situation. All he advised for me to do on that first call was to try something called 4 Square Breathing.
Breathe in for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds.... repeat.
That was about it for the first call. We scheduled another call for 3 days later and I'm thinking he's going to go over the notes he wrote down, then on the next call he'll ask some more questions, and then help me to start chipping away at this.
3 days later and I still feel like shit (hopeless, full of despair, exhausted, unable to sleep).... he calls me at the scheduled time for the second call and he sounds all chipper and excited to hear how I was doing.
"So! Are you doing any better??!"
"Not much if any."
Doctor: "Haven't you been doing the 4 Square Breathing?"
Me: "Well sure, but it hasn't cleared up the issue. Wait... is that it?! Just a breathing exercise to clear up all of this??!"
Doctor: "No, no, no.... we have other things we can try also."
Me: (relieved but wary) "Great... what else can I do?"
Doctor: "Let's increase it to a 5 Square Breathing exercise."
(I actually thought this fucker was making fun of me at this point. Usually I'm much more reserved and not one to lash out at an honest attempt at helping.)
Me: "One extra second of breathing??!! That's your advice?! Haven't you read over the notes from our first meeting??"
Doctor: "Notes?"
Me: "I gotta go"
That was the head honcho of the employee assistance department for mental health issues.
From there I started seeing a litany of psychologists and psychiatrists with little improvement on Doctor Breathie's Breath Treatment.
