what the dumbest people alive learned when they joined this cool new beach resort... ISIS something

[Deleted member 429137]

And by "joined" I mean "recruited by" and by "beach resort" I mean "desert terrorists" and by "ISIS something" I mean "motherfucking ISIS, you fucking idiot".

Some of their complaints:

It’s not entirely clear what Green Bird thought she was getting herself into when she joined an anti-imperialist Islamic terrorist cell, but apparently, she was still hoping that Starbucks would be exempt from the whole “death to America” thing. She tweeted: “I know it may be shirk but sometimes I do miss Starbucks. The coffee here is beyond wretched.”

Another fighter Belgian has indignantly tweeted that the food ISIS serves is “urgh so disgusting” and complained, “When I came to the state, I made it very clear the first day, ‘Sorry, I don’t like Arab food.’ ”

Surprisingly enough, ISIS attracts its fair share of women. While they adjust to their new lives of wearing burkas and following strict interpretations of sharia law, they all look for one thing—hair styling products.

ISIS blogs and message boards are full of new arrivals complaining about the surprising revelation that the fashion choices in Syria are a little more limited than those in Europe. One woman posted a complaint that, “The style here isn’t really that nice and their makeup most of the time goes towards the clowny look.”

Another woman sent a tweet of a shampoo bottle with the grumbling complaint, “No good at all.” She was apparently furious that her hair was coming out a bit frizzier than she’d hoped.

[A woman named Muhajira Umm Hamza] then went on to complain that the men “scream and talk to us in the street” and that “there is so little respect” for women in ISIS. Muhajira was somehow convinced that male ISIS members were famous for their respect of women’s rights. She specifically left the West because she thought men in ISIS would be more respectful to women and had written that the reason she’d done so was “to get rid of rude behavior.”

This is link is a must-read (and chock full of madness):

http://listverse.com/2016/05/06/10-first-world-problems-faced-by-isis-recruits/

 

[PrinceOfPain]

How can anyone be so removed from reality?
This explains so much about the state of Europe...

 

[PrinceOfPain]

Well, there is a silver lining:

When people get there and realize that the Islamic State isn’t the utopia they envisioned, though, the ending isn’t funny; it’s tragic. In one month alone, ISIS lined up 120 fighters from overseas who wanted to go home and shot them.

I don't think that's tragic at all.

 

[RespectableDenizen]

It's not really surprising that ISIS attracts women, lol.

 

[WrestlinganJudo]

Is this real?

 

[RespectableDenizen]

Well, there is a silver lining:



I don't think that's tragic at all.

Yeah, of all the stories of people regretting joining ISIS it was never "Oh yeah, I didn't agree with the rape and the killing of innocents" it was "I didn't want to clean toilets" or jumping off of a sinking ship. I'm glad ISIS is doing America's job here.

 

[Deleted member 429137]

Is this real?

Yep. Sources are provided in the link in the OP. And there were a few threads on here last year when that guy tried to quit ISIS because his ipod wouldn't work.

 

[Winnie The Foo]

Damn...now I'm going to start reading all those terms and conditions.

 

[Steve-French]

It's not really surprising that ISIS attracts women, lol.

They do love that bad boy dick.

 

[WrestlinganJudo]

They do love that bad boy dick.

Well, they are pretty bad I will have to admit.

 

[cabear]

Good, fk'em.