I'm not getting a motorcycle.
I attempted my CBT this morning in Walton-on-Thames and I was unprepared for how difficult I was going to find it.
I have Attention Deficit Disorder so I was finding it difficult to hold attention with my instructor, and as I am terrible when answering something on the spot in a conversation, I was giving really stupid answers. He was nice overall, but there was an underlying hint of sarcasm in his voice. Fair enough.
I found listening to simple processes quite difficult, even from getting on and off the bike, and it became an issue when I was actually starting to ride, as I kept stalling with the clutch. I got over this when setting off, but I kept stalling when stopping. What didn't help that we were using a sectioned off area in a leisure centre parking lot which was rather tiny, so I had to do and anticipate things quickly.
I also had issues with balance and the fact that I am a large man with very long legs and immobile ankles. The top of my right leg was killing me, around the waist. Add into this mental fatigue and frustration, and I lost all passion for riding.
I zoned out completely when my instructor was explaining engine braking and did a circuit through guesswork. I knew then that I was too pained, too unsure, too frustrated and too exhausted to go out on the road.
He went to the bathroom, I took my ill-fitting helmet and gloves off, made small-talk with the young Sikh fellow who was getting his moped licence, then when he came back, shook his hand, thanked him for his time, said that I was quitting and that motorcycling wasn't for me, then drove off.
Truth be told, I may be able to ride, but one morning in a tiny part of a car park isn't going to cut it. I need days of pressure-free piss-around time to get to grips with things and I just couldn't get it.
Oh well, £450 down the toilet, and I guess I can just save money for my future holidays from here on in.
Thank you all for your responses and support.