Serious question

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shanegotu11

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As most of you now know I have a autistic child. He is high functioning autistic child. I have lost a job over bs and my son can't be in daycare due to issues with staff and certain kids. My son gets along with kids but he is over stimulated.

We have applied for Ssi and should and will get it. However, it's not gonna be like a job I've had.


This is my question. I can't expect my mid 60 year old parents to drive 45 minutes daily to watch my son. (They are great) I can't put my son in daycare. My wife has a decent job and says she is OK with me dealing with him. My career is now on hold.

Madden gaming is paying the bills and that's it. Nothing more. Stretch to get there and that's why I'm promoting my YouTube channel.

I feel guilty. I feel like I'm letting down my wife and her family. I just need to be there for my son.

What is your opinion?
 
I feel for you but what is the question?
 
Sounds like you should get a job and are just trying to find an excuse not to. You are putting too much burden on your wife.
 
shanegotu11 said:
Should I feel guilty for staying at home while wife works and play a video game?

Even tho she said for me too.
Click to expand...
If it works for you guys, I don't see the problem.
If it is not really working out and you could be doing something more/else, then I think that is something you should look into.
 
shanegotu11 said:
This is what I feel ppl think. Whose to watch my child them?
Click to expand...
Why not combine it?
Since you are looking after your child, why not look after some other children at the same time and get money?
 
Luger said:
If it works for you guys, I don't see the problem.
If it is not really working out and you could be doing something more/else, then I think that is something you should look into.
Click to expand...


I'm at a crossroad. Get a outside job and pray my son can handle the day and have $ or stay home and be broke..
 
Luger said:
Why not combine it?
Since you are looking after your child, why not look after some other children at the same time and get money?
Click to expand...


Oh that's a good idea. Smart idea. I will post that
 
shanegotu11 said:
This is what I feel ppl think. Whose to watch my child them?
Click to expand...

A daycare. He is high functioning and gets along great with other kids, just needs a little less stimulation. The daycarewith professionals could handle this no problem.
 
I feel for you bro, never loose your strenght, no matter what .
If i was in your position i would be worried that the "extra-burden" on your wife beeing the only one that works could have a negative affect in your relationship or your long time mental stability and welfare ... no offence intended bro.
Allthough im totally against banks and the financial system, what i would purpose to you is, if you can, get a small loan from a bank to even the balance ... in that way you can put your son in a good daycare whyle gaining time to look for a decent job that makes you happy, and that can possibilitate you to pay for the small loan , the daycare and your bills.
I totally understand that you want to be there for your son , and i sincerely hope that you´ll never lack the fortitude to deal with whatever comes.
 
Take care of your kid, man, and don't let any person tell you otherwise. If that means staying at home with him for awhile, so be it. The naysayers don't have to live your life. You put too much emphasis on what people will say.
 
I don't know where you live but in many areas there are day cares specifically for high- functioning autistic kids. They can be expensive but there are also many ways to get financial assistance.
 
Since the courts forced the mainstreaming of education for mentally handicapped children, the schools hire staff to deal with them. A friends wife, a retired teacher, answered an ad for a part time teaching job and the job entailed sitting with an 11 year old boy who couldn't speak or even chew food. He could drink through a straw and was fed a liquid diet. He didn't seem to recognize anyone including his parents. She said all he could do was drool, defecate and urinate but his parents wanted him in school where they basically provided daycare.

I know another woman who also works with special needs students in another district who basically says her job is babysitting.
 
shanegotu11 said:
Should I feel guilty for staying at home while wife works and play a video game?

Even tho she said for me too.
Click to expand...

Can't you just work part-time as a day care? Then you may work out of home and still can provide care for your son, maybe a kid here or there to supplement your income and you are still working.
 
shanegotu11 said:
As most of you now know I have a autistic child. He is high functioning autistic child. I have lost a job over bs and my son can't be in daycare due to issues with staff and certain kids. My son gets along with kids but he is over stimulated.

We have applied for Ssi and should and will get it. However, it's not gonna be like a job I've had.


This is my question. I can't expect my mid 60 year old parents to drive 45 minutes daily to watch my son. (They are great) I can't put my son in daycare. My wife has a decent job and says she is OK with me dealing with him. My career is now on hold.

Madden gaming is paying the bills and that's it. Nothing more. Stretch to get there and that's why I'm promoting my YouTube channel.

I feel guilty. I feel like I'm letting down my wife and her family. I just need to be there for my son.

What is your opinion?
Click to expand...

If your wife and family are disappointed that you are willing to put you career dreams and ambitions on hold in order to be a full time father for your autistic child....they kinda hard to please.
 
If you think this could be a long term thing, maybe try a career that allows you to work remote or with flexible hours.

Learn design or coding and start a freelance business.

Buy a nice camera and start a photography business.

Make shit on etsy.
 
I don't have a kid so it's easy for me to say just get a job and get that money, obviously once you have children perspectives change and all that matters is taking care of your kid, so if that means chillin at home for a minute then so be it. Do what you feel inside is best to do, in due time everything will work out. Keep your head up and never lose your strength bro.
 
MustangCobraSVT said:
A daycare. He is high functioning and gets along great with other kids, just needs a little less stimulation. The daycarewith professionals could handle this no problem.
Click to expand...

He has been kicked out of all 5 daycares. YMCA, b&g club (3) east side, and after school program.

He does get along with "most" kids. Its the ones that he doesn't and they or him clash....that he fights physically and I get called to get him.
 
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