% of successful marriages, from your own point of view

[NHB7]

Most my friends never married (or aren't married yet). Of those that did marry, they're all still married. But only one has been married more than 10 years.

I think most the people I consider friends are thoughtful in consideration of life partners. I don't hang out with the type of person that would impulsively marry someone early in their relationship or despite frequent conflict in their relationship. That being said, I'm sure some of them will one day divorce.

 

[Nameless Ghoul]

Jesus, did she fuck up
Here in Michigan men are slaughtered in divorces

Michigan huh? I guess he didn't call ADAM?


I'd say ..60% if I had to answer the OP

 

[Shawn91111]

Close to 100%, I really thought about it and don't know anyone who is divorced or separated, but I don't know if all are truly happy, not sure about that.

 

[5H3RD0G]

Improbable to have a fully realized marriage due to educational limitations of our time. It can only be a certain level of unity rather than pure and real bond.

 

[TeTe]

Some of the happiest couples I know never got married. I think it's a bit overrated.. I mean, I went nine years dating a women and never got married to her and she wasn't the right person. Good thing we didn't get married.

I'd really have to find the perfect person (for me) in order to get married.. I'm already 36 so obviously I was never in a huge rush.

 

[indo80]

I would say 2 out of 10 marriages involve actual happy couples

Lots of people stay together but they're miserable.

2/10 in my estimate

The thing is being single can be a misery of its own. A lot of people stay together during tough times and one of the partners adapts to the person they marry. Given time people start to appreciate each other more once they go through the bottom of the cycle. Ofcourse i personally believes 25% of the population is unbearable so divorce is the only option.

 

[indo80]

Some of the happiest couples I know never got married. I think it's a bit overrated.. I mean, I went nine years dating a women and never got married to her and she wasn't the right person. Good thing we didn't get married.

I'd really have to find the perfect person (for me) in order to get married.. I'm already 36 so obviously I was never in a huge rush.

There is no perfect person and even in happy marriages or relationships you have to check your expectations to a certain degree.

 

[KONG-D'SNT-TAP]

The thing is being single can be a misery of its own. A lot of people stay together during tough times and one of the partners adapts to the person they marry. Given time people start to appreciate each other more once they go through the bottom of the cycle. Ofcourse i personally believes 25% of the population is unbearable so divorce is the only option.

I'm single and love it.

 

[RedRocket44]

I surprisingly haven't seen too many divorces within family, friends, co-workers, etc.

For friends I'm only 30, so most people I hang out with are just getting married now or within the last few years. I only know one friend, a girl I went to public school with, that is divorced, and she's already married a second time, and has kids with both -- classic example of a chick who just rushed into things.

For co-workers, older family relatives, etc... I know a lot of people that seem to be in less than ideal relationships, my parents included. My manager at work is in his late 30s, married with 2 kids (and always talking about them), and I figured him to be a happily married guy the way he always talked and came off. We went to the States (Michigan) for work one day, and after doing what we needed to do, it was too late to head back to Canada, so we got a hotel for the night. Drank a 12 pack while we put together a power point presentation for his boss at the hotel, then hit up a steakhouse, then a bunch of brewpubs, and before I know it he's asking people where a good strip club is. I had a pretty business-like relationship with the guy... so I was kind of blindsided by this. Once we get there I go to get us beers and come back, and he's already getting a lap dance with 2 strippers. That really made me wonder how many people who you come in contact with on a regular basis, whether a 9-5 job or whatever... and come off as a happy family person, actually aren't as happy as they seem.

 

[TeTe]

There is no perfect person and even in happy marriages or relationships you have to check your expectations to a certain degree.

I agree, no one is perfect, I'm certainly not. But it would have to be someone that I'm obviously very attracted to and had the same attitude and values as me and preferably some similar interests... everything else is fairly minor.

I haven't met too many people like that over the past 15 years... although I do know one woman that fits the bill.

 

[j123]

Most of the people (who are married) that I know have been married for 2-3 years so thats still pretty early before all the bs starts to take shape.

But other than that, only 6 (including 2 uncle & aunts) I know of are married over 10 years and its still okay. Of course, I dunno what goes on in their homes, so I can't say how "happy" they are.

 

[indo80]

I surprisingly haven't seen too many divorces within family, friends, co-workers, etc.

For friends I'm only 30, so most people I hang out with are just getting married now or within the last few years. I only know one friend, a girl I went to public school with, that is divorced, and she's already married a second time, and has kids with both -- classic example of a chick who just rushed into things.

For co-workers, older family relatives, etc... I know a lot of people that seem to be in less than ideal relationships, my parents included. My manager at work is in his late 30s, married with 2 kids (and always talking about them), and I figured him to be a happily married guy the way he always talked and came off. We went to the States (Michigan) for work one day, and after doing what we needed to do, it was too late to head back to Canada, so we got a hotel for the night. Drank a 12 pack while we put together a power point presentation for his boss at the hotel, then hit up a steakhouse, then a bunch of brewpubs, and before I know it he's asking people where a good strip club is. I had a pretty business-like relationship with the guy... so I was kind of blindsided by this. Once we get there I go to get us beers and come back, and he's already getting a lap dance with 2 strippers. That really made me wonder how many people who you come in contact with on a regular basis, whether a 9-5 job or whatever... and come off as a happy family person, actually aren't as happy as they seem.

or he may still be happily married and when given the chance to let loose he took full advantage of it . ha ha Trust me kids are draining no matter how much you love them

 

[indo80]

Most of the people (who are married) that I know have been married for 2-3 years so thats still pretty early before all the bs starts to take shape.

But other than that, only 6 (including 2 uncle & aunts) I know of are married over 10 years and its still okay. Of course, I dunno what goes on in their homes, so I can't say how "happy" they are.

People have different opinions on what happy truly means as well so some yelling or fighting once in a while is perfectly fine for one set of couples but to a outsider they may appear miserable. which relationship doesnt has some verbal arguments and people say things that they regret afterwards

 

[RedRocket44]

or he may still be happily married and when given the chance to let loose he took full advantage of it . ha ha Trust me kids are draining no matter how much you love them

I'm sure kids can be draining, but I don't see how that ties into lapdances, strippers, or being happy. If having kids means the end to personal happiness, your love life, etc... then why the fuck ever have them?

I dunno, maybe I'm a bit traditional when it comes to this, but I can't imagine his personal / love life is wonderful, if the one night he's away from home on work, he's out getting lap dances... and while with somebody that works for him (for only a short time... he had been my manager for only a few months), that he only knows on a professional level. I actually didn't know if he was joking or not when he was asking people about the strip club. I don't know how I could be happy with myself... I mean, it's not technically cheating, but if your wife was paying money to get grinded on by another naked dude... it would probably be fucking over -- no?

I mean, I personally don't know how many other nights he would have been away from his wife, but if the one time he's away with me he's doing that, I can only imagine he's doing it any other opportunity he gets as well, and that doesn't sound like somebody who's happily married to me.

 

[Mike]

Well my mother is still with my stepdad, but I don't think she's thrilled with him. Look pretty dysfunctional to me. Of course my marriage did not work out, neither did my best buddies. My other bud is just starting his divorce process. Most people I've known casually have either had long term relationships that ended before marriage, or are divorced. Now that I'm in my mid 30's it seems a lot more common for people to have one divorce under their belt.

I do know two couples that are married, but I'm not close enough to know how that's going to work out. My only other close friend is also married, but every time I talk to him he seems pretty meh about it. I was shocked to hear he got married, I think it was a case of being slowly badgered into it by his girl. Well careful what you wish for lol. I would agree with under 25% of people in our generation being happily married.

People are more selfish than they used to be, it's far easier to get attention from other sources and surround yourself with an echo chamber telling you that you're always right. Also there's not societal pressure forcing people to stay together, and people seem to put less value into relationships of any kind. Modern culture puts an emphasis on everything being disposable.

 

[odog]

My friends that got married in their 20s all got divorced. My friends that married in their 30s are all still together. So currently everyone I know is in a successful marriage.

 

[FierceRedBelt]

I'm sure kids can be draining, but I don't see how that ties into lapdances, strippers, or being happy. If having kids means the end to personal happiness, your love life, etc... then why the fuck ever have them?

I dunno, maybe I'm a bit traditional when it comes to this, but I can't imagine his personal / love life is wonderful, if the one night he's away from home on work, he's out getting lap dances... and while with somebody that works for him (for only a short time... he had been my manager for only a few months), that he only knows on a professional level. I actually didn't know if he was joking or not when he was asking people about the strip club. I don't know how I could be happy with myself... I mean, it's not technically cheating, but if your wife was paying money to get grinded on by another naked dude... it would probably be fucking over -- no?

I mean, I personally don't know how many other nights he would have been away from his wife, but if the one time he's away with me he's doing that, I can only imagine he's doing it any other opportunity he gets as well, and that doesn't sound like somebody who's happily married to me.

I think you're reading way too much into it. Some people consider a night out in a strip club while putting down some brews as a perfectly acceptable thing to do with coworkers. It's how they unwind on business trips and it likely has nothing to do with hating their wife, children, or the stress they might cause.

 

[RedRocket44]

I think you're reading way too much into it. Some people consider a night out in a strip club while putting down some brews as a perfectly acceptable thing to do with coworkers. It's how they unwind on business trips and it likely has nothing to do with hating their wife, children, or the stress they might cause.

I don't think I'm reading too much into it at all. I think your thought process is the average male mind at work. It's fine if dudes do it, but if chicks do it that's crossing a line.

A married man going to a strip club after away on business is one thing (still a little seedy), getting a lap dance by 2 strippers within 5 minutes is sort of another.

Honestly, if you're wife was away on business, and at the end of the night after work was done you found out she had some dude grinding on her and his dick slapping in her face you'd be OK with it?

 

[HUNTERMANIA]

I know one good marriage that I can say for sure is good and what I would want from a marriage. That's it. But, my sample size is limited.

 

[Rhood]

It's safe to say marriage isn't permanent.