Married with newborn on the way.

[Banchan]

you are giving the guy advice to leave an eight year relationship, while his wife (not girlfriend) is pregnant? You have an itchy trigger finger there Tex.

Did I really say that ? Or did you imagine I said that ?

 

[Deleted member 409801]

If there was strong evidence to suggest that therapy had its place in a marriage, there would be a strong opinion to seek help before the marriage went bad as a means to maintain a healthy marriage. It has its "place" primarily as a last resort, when it is it is already too late.

The only thing I see viable for TS is to move out. Have some time and distance apart. See what life is like without the wife. See what life will be like raising a baby with his wife from separate

Pretty sure you actually said that ^

 

[Deleted member 409801]

Perhaps you should read the thread more carefully before posting a response. He says he doesn't feel comfortable talking to anybody in his life nor a therapist about this. Yet all of your posts suggest that he do just that or criticize others who have a different point of view than you. Your posts in the kids thread is also very similar.

Did I personally attack you man? I spoke up , because you seem a little loose with the " just leave , and do you" stuff . That's only my opinion an should be taken as such. You aren't exactly one to be casting stones for being critical for disagreeing......youve done nothing but go back to the well over and over again in this thread for the same thing. I think your advice is poor...
So what? Something obviously compels you to take it personally that I don't agree with you? You think homeboy should leave.....i think it may possibly be rash because there is much at stake and we are getting a small glimpse of the situation here. What am I missing? What the fuck else is there to discuss. If you're salty about the other thread than bring it up in that one. This is TS problem not ours....feel free to continue this pointless exchange.................
...................
.........with someone else

 

[dc007]

Gotta get the spice back my dude. Buy a bucket of baby oil and dip her in it. Then put her in a neon green hexagon fishnet body-suit. Hopefully she knows how to dance for a white chick, turn on the 2 Chainz add some fuck me pumps to the outfit have some liquor and a bucket of Popeye's chicken nearby... Rinse and repeat with a few variations once a week, make an event out of it.

There ya go man.

I don t think this works for white couples...

 

[irish_thug]

Gotta get the spice back my dude. Buy a bucket of baby oil and dip her in it. Then put her in a neon green hexagon fishnet body-suit. Hopefully she knows how to dance for a white chick, turn on the whitesnake add some fuck me boots to the outfit have some Jack Daniel's and a bucket of beer nearby... Rinse and repeat with a few variations once a week, make an event out of it.

There ya go man.

fixed

 

[Cake4Breakfast]

Did I really say that ? Or did you imagine I said that ?

If you don't think that moving out is leaving, then you and I have different understandings. As you have said, you can't control the other person, and he doesn't know how she would react if he moves out. I would suspect that asking for a separation at this point would make any future relationship unlikely.

Just curious, have you been a parent to a newborn?

 

[Banchan]

Pretty sure you actually said that ^

Now it totally makes sense why having children is your life purpose.

 

[SaucyJack]

Regardless of the circumstances, if TS leaves her now or anytime soon, people will judge him harshly. I'm not saying you stick it out in an unhappy relationship because of that, just that I've seen people who don't consider this get taken by surprise because their focus in the situation had become so narrow.

 

[Deleted member 409801]

Now it totally makes sense why having children is your life purpose.

still crying about that two days later huh?


you're a reachy little fucker aren't you? Everything is an absolute for you there isn't it simple jack .....herpity der der...disagrees that kids are a plague = that's all you've got in life....

You know that's not how things work. Lots of Nuance and grey to be had in life. You're just looking for cheap and easy digs (and doing a piss poor job at it)Try again.

 

[ajwbjj87]

Sometimes it's better for the kid if you do seperate

 

[GearSolidMetal]

Councelling.

Reading a book about repairing marriages.

Freely communicate with your wife about everything.

Dediscovering the commonalities that made your relationship strong in the first place.

A shitload of sex, it'll improve the attitudes and connection of both of you. (Since she's preggers, look up appropriate positions)

Also, does she feel the same way?

Btw, I know a shitload of guys that broke up with their partners because they craved the single life, and they soon discovered it's not the same and they regretted burning the bridge with who they loved the most.

Whatever you choose.... I highly encourage...

Spoiler

 

[Cake4Breakfast]

Now it totally makes sense why having children is your life purpose.

Even if that is someone's life purpose, that seems to be a mature, and certainly evolutionarily advantageous one.

 

[Cake4Breakfast]

Sometimes it's better for the kid if you do seperate

True, but sometimes people marry even crazier people, and then the kid has an awful step parent to deal with that doesn't want them in the picture. Some step parents can really be wonderful additions to a child's life, and some can cause serious damage to a developing person. People need to take an honest look at how they ended up where they did in their marriage, even if they married a very disordered personality.

 

[Cake4Breakfast]

Whatever happened with this?

 

[DespicablePeep]

You all gave good advice at the time, thank you all!

Sort of ashamed at that time but it was how I felt, was not ready to be a farther I think that was the issue, my daughter was born late 2014 and I stayed with the wife for 2 years, finally I had the courage to say I was not happy and I moved out, but kept visiting almost everyday to help with my daughter, we still had sex and so forth, started with Tinder and going out with a bunch of woman, then met a chick that had everything I wanted but was not crazy about her, but she was the best company I ever had

We would sit at her balcony and drink 3 bottles of wine and talk all night and she was very good in bed, could ride you all night and not get tired, would give great BJ all the way to the end (my first in life), after 6 months with her I still had not filled for a divorce, she started to have doubts about it and decided to make my life miserable, cutting me off and then giving me hope and so forth, this lasted maybe 4 months before I told her to fuck off

All this while my parents were pissed that I had moved out of my house with a young child, my father kept saying my daughter would be raised by another men eventually, for some reason I started to cry a lot, lost a ton of weight, my sleep went to shit and I developed a depression, something I thought I would never have in life

Had panic attacks, never wanted to take antidepressents, did not accept I was depressed, it took me a good 2 years to come back half normal, it has been 3 years and now I can say I´m almost fully healed.

Anyway after 8 months depressed my wife decided to help me and we got back together, while in the middle of panic attacks and sleepless nights I had another kid with her which is now 1 year old. I´m happy with my life

I want you to come back here in 20 years, TS, and tell us how things turned out. Look me up. I'll be making juvenile puns, looking how many replies they get. And you say to me, you say, "MortalWombat, listen, remember that thread by a father-to-be who was thinking about leaving his unborn child because he was getting substandard blowies from his pudgy pregnant wife? I mean, it wasn't quite that simple, but remember how that's what you reduced it to in your judgmental mind? Well, I was that father-to-be. And this is what happened, MortalWombat."

And then you tell me your story.

Whatever happened with this?

 

[JAEGERX]

she's gonna divorce you and take all your shit

 

[cottagecheesefan]

Hopefully she doesn't find out you make right-wing posts in the war room.

 

[TSO]

You all gave good advice at the time, thank you all!

Sort of ashamed at that time but it was how I felt, was not ready to be a farther I think that was the issue, my daughter was born late 2014 and I stayed with the wife for 2 years, finally I had the courage to say I was not happy and I moved out, but kept visiting almost everyday to help with my daughter, we still had sex and so forth, started with Tinder and going out with a bunch of woman, then met a chick that had everything I wanted but was not crazy about her, but she was the best company I ever had

We would sit at her balcony and drink 3 bottles of wine and talk all night and she was very good in bed, could ride you all night and not get tired, would give great BJ all the way to the end (my first in life), after 6 months with her I still had not filled for a divorce, she started to have doubts about it and decided to make my life miserable, cutting me off and then giving me hope and so forth, this lasted maybe 4 months before I told her to fuck off

All this while my parents were pissed that I had moved out of my house with a young child, my father kept saying my daughter would be raised by another men eventually, for some reason I started to cry a lot, lost a ton of weight, my sleep went to shit and I developed a depression, something I thought I would never have in life

Had panic attacks, never wanted to take antidepressents, did not accept I was depressed, it took me a good 2 years to come back half normal, it has been 3 years and now I can say I´m almost fully healed.

Anyway after 8 months depressed my wife decided to help me and we got back together, while in the middle of panic attacks and sleepless nights I had another kid with her which is now 1 year old. I´m happy with my life

Holy shit man, this gives me hopecuz I'm going through this shit right now.

 

[SleepyBoy]

This would be a shitty romantic comedy

 

[irish_thug]

You all gave good advice at the time, thank you all!

Sort of ashamed at that time but it was how I felt, was not ready to be a farther I think that was the issue, my daughter was born late 2014 and I stayed with the wife for 2 years, finally I had the courage to say I was not happy and I moved out, but kept visiting almost everyday to help with my daughter, we still had sex and so forth, started with Tinder and going out with a bunch of woman, then met a chick that had everything I wanted but was not crazy about her, but she was the best company I ever had

We would sit at her balcony and drink 3 bottles of wine and talk all night and she was very good in bed, could ride you all night and not get tired, would give great BJ all the way to the end (my first in life), after 6 months with her I still had not filled for a divorce, she started to have doubts about it and decided to make my life miserable, cutting me off and then giving me hope and so forth, this lasted maybe 4 months before I told her to fuck off

All this while my parents were pissed that I had moved out of my house with a young child, my father kept saying my daughter would be raised by another men eventually, for some reason I started to cry a lot, lost a ton of weight, my sleep went to shit and I developed a depression, something I thought I would never have in life

Had panic attacks, never wanted to take antidepressents, did not accept I was depressed, it took me a good 2 years to come back half normal, it has been 3 years and now I can say I´m almost fully healed.

Anyway after 8 months depressed my wife decided to help me and we got back together, while in the middle of panic attacks and sleepless nights I had another kid with her which is now 1 year old. I´m happy with my life

Sorry about the ride you've had to take, but glad things are working out for you. Congrats on the second kid.