I agree. No one has really nailed the essence of the character.
I like Ruffalo, but he doesn't even come across as that angry, even in the 2012 version, where they were still treating Hulk as a bit of a wild card. Even then, by the end of the film, he was playing pretty nicely with others. Since Avengers II, the Hulk has honestly just come across as surly as opposed to consumed with undying rage.
Since the Hulk has been pretty team-oriented since Avengers 1, they've avoided playing up the Frankenstein's monster angle, for obvious reasons; if you do a movie about Banner truly struggling with the Hulk's raw, untamed anger, the movie will have to be about the Hulk; there won't be room to deal with much else.
Honestly, I think that a Hulk movie might need to get the R-rated treatment a la Deadpool or Logan in order to do the property justice. The Hulk as a character study works best when you can create the tension of Banner barely managing to contain himself, surrounded by people who he'll tear through like tissue-paper if he loses control.
For that kind of Hulk movie to work, you need a director who understands the cinematic value of the threat and anticipation of violence. I don't think Tarantino is suitable for this kind of property for a number of reasons, but his sort of ability to create anticipation and tension would be hugely useful in making a Hulk movie work.