Im on secretbenefits

[jeff7b9]

I’m pretty mid and expect to be spoiled. And men do spoil me pretty nicely, I gotta say.

The problem isn’t the women. It’s your men. They want to throw hundreds to thousands around just to speak to a chick. So long as there’s a supplier . . .

I can't blame a woman for accepting what is being offered.

__________________

(Nothing below is meant as an attack or even any assumption on you, all below is general)
___________


Observing this bizarre modern dating scene I notice something interesting.

People complain (both men & women) about the circumstances THEY set themselves up for.


People don't seem to grasp the basic psychology of the early phase of dating.


Whether we like it or not, the early stage of a relationship is a struggle for power.
Someone is being chased and someone is chasing.

If a guy buys a girl a drink to talk to her, buys her dinner to date her, buys her gifts, to get in bed with her, he has:

Established himself as the chaser
set himself up for a transactional relationship
Established the expectation that she should expect.to receive gifts and be pursued and put on a pedestal

Ok dude. Well, don't complain about it or call her a gold digger when everything followed the pattern you established.
_________


On the flipside if a girl meets a guy and she is in "peacock mode" and in full wardrobe and makeup and everything you are advertising is physical, don't complain "he just wants me for sex" when that is what you brought to the table

____________


People (both sides) need to understand a few simple concepts that will largely dictate how their relationships play out:


Expectations.

The dynamic of early relationship power.
Who is chasing who?

Flirting is a SKILL.
They say women decide in the first minute if they will sleep with a guy. That is a short window of opportunity to get her to be curious or intrigued . If a dude comes out of the gate with over the top compliments, then he is setting himself up to chase her, better move would have been to establish a playful banter or even a teasing or some sort of assertive or confident dynamic.

Same for chicks. Being pretty doesn't mean you have social SKILLS


______________


Additional concepts:

Baggage

Anticipation

Confidence /desperation

It is much easier to succeed in dating if you have your own shit together. Be healthy, happy, have friends and support structure, understand what phase of life you are in, don't expect experience from someone young or virginity or low body count in your 30s, there is a time and a place for everything

 

[Aurelian]

This is why you get counterfeit money specifically to spend on these kind of girls, that way you get what you want and teach them a valuable lesson on why you shouldn't be a gold digger

 

[Slapjit]

I’m pretty mid

Hello sohni ji hoping Waheguru bless your remaining evening with many wonderful feelings and sparkle in your eyes haanji

 

[Kardashians]

Hello sohni ji hoping Waheguru bless your remaining evening with many wonderful feelings and sparkle in your eyes haanji

Thank
You hun I always appreciate your kind words <3

 

[GSP_37]

You go to secret benefits and are shocked they are looking for a sugar daddy?

I thought he was complaining the fugly girls thought they were hot enough to warrant a sugar daddy.

 

[Intermission]

I’m pretty mid and expect to be spoiled. And men do spoil me pretty nicely, I gotta say.

The problem isn’t the women. It’s your men. They want to throw hundreds to thousands around just to speak to a chick. So long as there’s a supplier . . .

I really dont care but I'll ask anyway. Any moment where you felt bad about accepting their money? Have you ever sent them nudes?

 

[I Am Legion]

Past my era. In my day if a mid chick was acting like a brat she got called out really fast. So did mid dudes. NY was ruthless lol. I remember my buddy went up to a girl to ask her if he could get to the bar. He just said excuse me and she went off. "Who do you think you are blah blah blah" He looks at her and says "You're a fucking hippo blocking half the bar, I was asking you to move not trying to talk to you. This place doesn't serve food why are you even here". The whole bar saw and heard it. Hysterical.

 

[Kardashians]

I really dont care but I'll ask anyway. Any moment where you felt bad about accepting their money? Have you ever sent them nudes?

No. Why would I feel bad? They get off on it, I get paid for it. It’s an exchange.

And no, I don’t send nudes let alone to random men. There’s no need for nudes anyway in findom, which makes it so great.

 

[Intermission]

No. Why would I feel bad? They get off on it, I get paid for it. It’s an exchange.

And no, I don’t send nudes let alone to random men. There’s no need for nudes anyway in findom, which makes it so great.

You have written that you fool them into thinking you were going to marry them. There seems to be this blur between play and reality, similar to what can happen in physical fetiches like bondage and rape play. It can easily go overboard.

That's what I imagine happens, but I havent studied the dynamics of it.

 

[Kardashians]

You have written that you fool them into thinking you were going to marry them. There seems to be this blur between play and reality, similar to what can happen in physical fetiches like bondage and rape play. It can easily go overboard.

That's what I imagine happens, but I havent studied the dynamics of it.

I have never fooled anybody into thinking I’d marry them lol. I’m more of a “give me x amount of money and I won’t have you eat shit” they send and I go “haha jk. Eat it” type.

 

[Intermission]

I have never fooled anybody into thinking I’d marry them lol. I’m more of a “give me x amount of money and I won’t have you eat shit” they send and I go “haha jk. Eat it” type.

So strange I'm not under your spell. I'm apparently immune to your charm. Sister, nobody logs into a findom site out of the blue and just flushes down money. It's not a casino. it's not well known.

 

[Versez]

Hello sohni ji hoping Waheguru bless your remaining evening with many wonderful feelings and sparkle in your eyes haanji

That gimmick is hilarious lol

 

[Slapjit]

That gimmick is hilarious lol

Tenk you buddy ji may Waheguru bless your tomorrow morning with desi strength and fresh warrior spirit

 

[Unknown Pleasures]

I've never heard of "Secret Benefits", but it sounds like your first mistake.

 

[Contempt]

That gimmick is hilarious lol

Someone has been a naughty boy... What did you do to get a spanking from the mods?

 

[Natural Order]

Bonobo high theatre. You don't say?