Elections If you were Trump's speech writer, how would you start his RNC speech?

[Fedorgasm]

So on Thursday Trump is scheduled to give his first speech since getting shot in the ear.

If you were his speech writer, how would you open the speech?

I see a few options.

If he wanted to start with levity, I could see something like "So how was YOUR weekend?"

But I think it's probably the smarter move to walk to the podium and very slowly and deliberately say "There but for the grace of God go I" I think that would probably get him a 5 minute standing ovation.

How would you open his speech?

 

[heloder]

"Hello America! I decided to not run for President, because I realized I'm actually a terrible person and woefully unqualified for the position. Thank you!"

 

[jk7707]

"Hello America! I decided to not run for President, because I realized I'm actually a terrible person and woefully unqualified for the position. Thank you!"

If only someone could sneak that into the teleprompter.

 

[LeonardoBjj]

- I always assumed that he speaks whatnever crosses his mind, at any given moment!

 

[Fedorgasm]

- I always assumed that he speaks whatnever crosses his mind, at any given moment!

I'm sure he has speech writers. He just goes off script a lot.

 

[MetalGearTrump]

"This attempt on my life has left me scarred and deformed... but I assure you my resolve has never been stronger. In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire, for a safe and secure society... "

 

[freakroor]

“Ladies and gentlemen, lend me your ears”

 

[nostradumbass]

Probably start with a joke about the bandage and say it's from cosmetic surgery or something else.

The RNC audience don't have the same aversion to Christianity that the DNC would, so probably mention that he miraculously survived the shooting at 6:11pm, and read ephesians 6:11.

 

[LeonardoBjj]

“Ladies and gentlemen, lend me your ears”

 

[Dr Curtis Love]

It will most likely have to be in crayon and have pictures for him to be able to read it.

 

[Pliny Pete]

Many men, many, many, many, many men
Wish death upon me...

 

[Lord_Impaler]

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil

 

[MetalGearTrump]

It will most likely have to be in crayon and have pictures for him to be able to read it.

I think you're confusing him with Bidet

 

[curryjunkie]

person , woman, man, camera, tv..

 

[Osculater]

"Let freedom ring with a machine gun blast, hell yeah America! "

 

[Boxiana]

“I just flew in from Florida. Boy are my arms tired.”

 

[rearnakedchoke]

When you come for the king. You better not miss!

 

[Big Nasty Edison]

I would just plagiarize an MLK or Nelson Mandela speech but add the words "tremendous", "yuge" and "bigly" here and there.

 

[Hearse Lightning]

 

[Jin Akutsu]

He should rap this: