Gym assessment sales talk

[SSgt Dickweed]

So cringe!

After years of not going to a gym, I plan to commit again. There was this machine that checks your body fat percentage and protein/mineral content. Idk how accurate those are, but I'm a dork so I'll keep my criticism to myself.

And then there was a trial run, pushup, squat kinda stress test which is alright. And then the posture analysis. Apparently I lack an ass so my quads do all the work and my knees point a bit outward because of it. I had to stand like an asshole for 20 minutes and have the staff poke my hips shoulders and spine to know where I'm off.

As for the money stuff, I have had one of these sales talks before. I know the gym staff are doing their jobs but I always feel awkward and have to out effort to not zone out during the sales talk part.

As you expect, there's a lot of "oh you're work is sooo interesting". Kinda puts me off from signing up because it seems bullshitty. Despite this, I still aspire not to be skinny fat anymore but I'm also lazy.

I currently do simple bedroom stuff and jog occassionally. I'll start a new tech job soon and want to feel out the work sched first before spending money on lessons (I already paid the membership fees).

 

[Flower2dPeople]

 

[jeff7b9]

Do what works for you sir and get yourself healthy!!

FYI: diet is WAY more important.
Exercise is good, but diet is the top priority if you went to see results.

PS: I motherfucking HATE gyms.
Jesus fuck if I had to put up with some of the cunts I see filming themselves doing exercises you would probably see ol Jeff on the news or in street collesium

 

[-sin-]

Agreed, signing up for corporate gyms is as bad as dealing with car salesmen. I go to one in my town and they had me do a body fat scan and tried to make me sign up for a free session with one of their personal trainers which was a strong nope for me. I really hate dealing with their staff but they have the best equipment.

You can avoid most of their bullshit if your health insurance offers a gym membership subscription program. I use one through BCBS that lets me join unlimited gyms in their network for about $35 a month with no contracts so I can cancel whenever. Joining or renewing membership with one of these services has been a lot less hassle.

 

[ong bak]

Running / jogging is not required and in some ways not ideal to improve body composition. It is higher impact and harder to keep going long term than simply just walking.
Nailing the nutrition, being active with general life / walking and lifting weights to send the signal to your body to retain / add muscle will all move you in a good direction.

I haven't had that kind of assessment when signing up to a gym before so guess it's not really a thing here.

 

[lsa]

did not read, but @Slobodan works as a PT at curves.
I am sure if you PM him he will set you up with a good program and can do diet plan too.

 

[Swiftie]

I know it's not the top notch gym that some go to, but I like Planet Fitness. No long term contract and I only pay $10 a month.

 

[Kowboy On Sherdog]

Congrats on becoming jacked

 

[Noveltymortar]

I currently do simple bedroom stuff

Tell us more about this.

 

[ong bak]

Tell us more about this.

He is low key bragging about his jacked forearm.

 

[NoSmilez]

Sign up online or get a gym pass through your insurance. You have a network of gyms you can drop in at. I have another gym I pay for because I don't like training at the same places. Certain places have different toys.

 

[ssBaldy]

I did body composition assessment at a doctor's, when I first came there and later on to monitor the effectiveness of my treatment.
Screw those gym assessments.

 

[Other]

Congrats on becoming jacked

YO! I sent this to you in confidence, now you're posting my pics without my permission. I thought was mates, I thought we was more than mates. I thought we was... friends.

 

[SirRealKiller]

Just keep in mind Gym is for fitness, not weight loss. If you want to be less chubby, focus on diet first and worry about the Gym as a secondary thing. However, lifting weights while losing weight has a lot of benefits as far as your end result. You will lose less muscle (possibly even build some) while losing weight if you lift. If you don't lift, some of the weight you lose will be muscle, not just fat.

So while lifting or going to the gym has fairly small impact on weight loss it does have an effect on how you look when you're done losing weight. And it can help your metabolism in the long term.

So, don't go buying some expensive training package thinking you have to do that to lose weight.

 

[PaleMoonlight]

Lol how much did they want to sign up?

 

[666]

Yea I had the same shit when I went to this physiotherapy clinic.

This guy would put some needles in my back for 5 minutes and then put a heat pad on my back for 15 minutes, leave me in a room with a stretch machine for 20 minutes and give me a printout of some sciatica exercises I could do.

This whole time he's rotating between 2-3 other patients making small talk with the same stupid story he told me. I can also see fake ass nice guys so that pissed me off too.

They had a room to do exercises also so last time I went he's like here's Janine she'll take you to the back and show you the exercises. So I go to the back and she goes through a couple reps of each one and then is like "Well you know how to do them now so you can do the sets now or ya know, it wouldn't make a difference if you just did them at home..."

$125 per session and I only see the guy for 10 minutes.

ANYWAYS the lesson I learned is that youtube and apps are the way to go. There's a wealth of knowledge out there. Cut out the fake smiling middle man, go to a regular gym and save time/money.

 

[supermurph]

Don't sign anything, do their stress test, and hurt yourself. Then call your local version of this guy, and build your own basement gym.

 

[Michaelangelo]

Then you have to mail them a letter to cancel

Fkn assholes

 

[PaddyO'malley]

I could go on for days about the bullshit gym employees are trained to put you through. The whole sales process is meant to poke at your insecurities and other hot buttons in order to get you to buy training services. If you see a fatty crying in the office during her session, I guarantee they did everything they could to make that happen lmfao.

They're also trained to get you to say the word "yes" as many times as possible, sometimes with an actual minimum number like 20 times, so that you're easier to trick you into saying yes when it comes time to shell out some cash to work with a trainer. Hence why everything sounds cringe and fake. Probably hit you with the ol' flip book too, yeah (feature, benefit, "yes" question)? Also, the trainer they set you up with 9/10 times is not knowledgeable enough to take care of the postural issues the other staff members said you needed to work on.

Don't get me wrong; the staff themselves mean well, but due to the way their pay structure is set up they will typically put their salesman hat on sooner than anything else. Commissions can sometimes double or triple their paycheck at the end of the pay cycle, so it often feels like you're buying a used car if you speak with them. Sign up online and you'll likely just get one phone call from one of the sales people to set up a free training session / sales pitch, tell them you've got it covered and they'll leave you alone. They'd be happy to take you off the call list because phone calls suck.

As for the exercises, just educate yourself on the fundamentals if you haven't already. Don't overcomplicate it just yet; find a simple strength routine, stick with it and always seek to improve your technique each session. When you feel like YouTube isn't cutting it, reach out to coaches in your area that have their own gym they train out of. Bonus points if they've been in the industry for more than 5+ years, as that means they've got a solid client base and would give very little shits if you didn't sign up for a huge session package.

 

[Volador]

So cringe!

After years of not going to a gym, I plan to commit again. There was this machine that checks your body fat percentage and protein/mineral content. Idk how accurate those are, but I'm a dork so I'll keep my criticism to myself.

And then there was a trial run, pushup, squat kinda stress test which is alright. And then the posture analysis. Apparently I lack an ass so my quads do all the work and my knees point a bit outward because of it. I had to stand like an asshole for 20 minutes and have the staff poke my hips shoulders and spine to know where I'm off.

As for the money stuff, I have had one of these sales talks before. I know the gym staff are doing their jobs but I always feel awkward and have to out effort to not zone out during the sales talk part.

As you expect, there's a lot of "oh you're work is sooo interesting". Kinda puts me off from signing up because it seems bullshitty. Despite this, I still aspire not to be skinny fat anymore but I'm also lazy.

I currently do simple bedroom stuff and jog occassionally. I'll start a new tech job soon and want to feel out the work sched first before spending money on lessons (I already paid the membership fees).

Those machines are bullshit. Posture analysis is bullshit. The stuff about the quads “doing all the work” so the knees blah blah is bullshit and makes no sense. Poking your hips to see “where you’re off” is bullshit, laughable stuff. None of that has serious medical validity.

But it’s good you joined a gym. Try to do a simple program that includes progressive overload and that is mainly centered on multi-joint movements that are easy to load progressively with time. Do some cardio on the side. Ignore the employees. You’ll be fine.