DRAGONLORD'S 2016 MOVIE GUIDE

What is your most anticipated film of 2016?


  • Total voters
    108
  • Poll closed .
Critics' Reviews for DIRTY GRANDPA

Rotten Tomatoes: 7% Approval Rating (3 out of 42 critics like it)

Consensus: Like a Werther's Original dropped down a sewer drain, Dirty Grandpa represents the careless fumbling of a classic talent that once brought pleasure to millions.

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JoBlo's Movie Emporium - Dirty Grandpa is certainly dirty. It's crude and rude, and that would've been great if it had offered a few laughs. It doesn't. At all. 1/10

CinemaBlend.com - Isn't De Niro at all concerned with his legacy? At all? Did he lose a bet? Was he challenging himself to find a new low after Little Fockers? We may never know the true answer. 1/5

Entertainment Weekly - Dirty Grandpa feels like spending 100-plus minutes with a scatalogical toddler, proudly showing you what he made in his diaper. Don't look if you don't have to. D+

Toronto Star - Dirty Grandpa does have one distinction. It makes De Niro's previous comedy low point Meet the Fockers look good by comparison. 1.5/4

Newark Star-Ledger - It's shocking without being truly outrageous, dirty without ever really crashing taboos. And for a road-trip comedy, it pretty much stays in the slow lane. With its blinker on. 1/4
 
Critics' Reviews for THE BOY

Rotten Tomatoes: 25% Approval Rating (3 out of 12 critics like it)

Consensus: Despite game efforts by the cast, this tepid horror opus is never scary enough to overcome its silly premise.

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CinemaBlend.com - The Boy twists and turns enjoyably up until its disappointing ending, where it reverts to type, which then ruins everything that had come before it. 2/5

AV Club - The story takes a couple of major turns, both so blatantly lifted from other horror films that to name their titles would give away the end of the movie. C

Blu-ray.com - Bell only wants to cheat his way through "The Boy," assembling a disappointingly flaccid chiller that's never quite as amplified or disturbing as it could be. D

Common Sense Media
- While it's not a terribly original entry in the "creepy doll" horror subgenre, this fright flick nonetheless offers interesting characters, a strong cast, expert pacing, and a spooky atmosphere. 3/5

Film Racket - Well-seasoned fright fans, however, will see through its baroque boos and come up with a doll sized disappointment. The actual movie is mind-numbing nonsense. 1.5/5
 
Critics' Reviews for IP MAN 3

Rotten Tomatoes: 83% Approval Rating (30 out of 36 critics like it)

Consensus: Ip Man 3 isn't the most tightly plotted biopic a kung fu fan could ask for, but the fight scenes are fun to watch -- and at times, the drama is even genuinely poignant.

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JoBlo's Movie Emporium - Lots of good action, but more episodic and uneven than its two predecessors. While still worth watching for the fights, it’s clear this series has run its course. 6/10

Washington Post - The carelessly plotted story consists mostly of setups for fight scenes, nicely staged in such distinctive locations as an elevator, an umbrella store and the hull of a partly built ship. 2.5/4

AV Club - The bright idea of the first Ip Man was to use a real person's life as the rough outline for a conventional martial arts adventure. That basic premise still has some juice left, given that it's always a joy to watch Yen work. B

IGN Movies - By far, this is the weakest tale of the three Ip Man movies, but the action sequences more than begin to make up for that. 6.5/10

Toronto Star - Acting is of the overdone variety and the dialogue is lousy, making Yen's restrained and quietly powerful performance stand out. Speak softly and pack a one-inch punch. 2.5/4
 
Critics' Reviews for SYNCHRONICITY

Rotten Tomatoes: 45% Approval Rating (9 out of 20 critics like it)

Consensus: Synchronicity's sci-fi reach exceeds its low-budget grasp, but it has some interesting ideas and serves overall as a nifty calling card for writer-director Jacob Gentry.

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We Got This Covered - Synchronicity is a methodically paced excursion into a thrilling sci-fi experience, winning over audiences with passionate genre charms. 7/10

The Playlist - Flaws keeps "Synchronicity" from rising above its limitations to become something great, and that may prevent some people from embracing it, but, there's a goofy charm to the entire film that ultimately makes it feel like a success. B

AV Club - Synchronicity is more contraption than movie, its plot as mechanically functional as a clock, rotating characters around like gears. C

Blu-ray.com - "Synchronicity" is a laudable attempt at mood and emotionality, but its ways with repetition and performance test patience, reducing the potency of its mysteries. C-

Movie Nation - Think of the shocks of “Primer,” the intricate puzzle of “Los cronocrimenes (Time Crimes”). No matter how gorgeous “Synchronicity” looks, it can’t keep you from feeling this was an opportunity missed. 1.5/4
 
Critics' Reviews for DIRTY GRANDPA

Rotten Tomatoes: 7% Approval Rating (3 out of 42 critics like it)

Consensus: Like a Werther's Original dropped down a sewer drain, Dirty Grandpa represents the careless fumbling of a classic talent that once brought pleasure to millions.

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JoBlo's Movie Emporium - Dirty Grandpa is certainly dirty. It's crude and rude, and that would've been great if it had offered a few laughs. It doesn't. At all. 1/10

CinemaBlend.com - Isn't De Niro at all concerned with his legacy? At all? Did he lose a bet? Was he challenging himself to find a new low after Little Fockers? We may never know the true answer. 1/5

Entertainment Weekly - Dirty Grandpa feels like spending 100-plus minutes with a scatalogical toddler, proudly showing you what he made in his diaper. Don't look if you don't have to. D+

Toronto Star - Dirty Grandpa does have one distinction. It makes De Niro's previous comedy low point Meet the Fockers look good by comparison. 1.5/4

Newark Star-Ledger - It's shocking without being truly outrageous, dirty without ever really crashing taboos. And for a road-trip comedy, it pretty much stays in the slow lane. With its blinker on. 1/4
heard this was horrible... and its such a jackass rip off.. One dude said
"If “Dirty Grandpaisn't the worst movie of 2016, I have some serious cinematic torture in my near future"
 
Critics' Reviews for MOJAVE

Rotten Tomatoes: 28% Approval Rating (8 out of 29 critics like it)

Consensus: This bizarre, quasi-existential neo-Western thriller is full of brainy chit-chat but doesn't actually offer any real ideas.

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Richard Roeper - This movie soars on the strength of the screenplay. Monahan gives Hedlund and in particular Isaac dozens upon dozens of rich, intricate lines, and they're both up to the task and then some. 4/4

The Playlist - A weird, uneven mixed bag, there's much about "Mojave" that's paradoxically maddening and doesn't really add up. However, a shallow premise, pompously overwrought dialogue, and hit-and-miss execution make for an occasionally enjoyable, but not entirely convincing effort. C+

CinemaBlend.com - Overwhelmingly lackluster, Mojave is neither the brooding meditation on existentialism or the taut, suspenseful thriller it obviously pines to be. Mojave lacks any substance to even remotely compel, while your interest will instantly be quashed by its annoying existential ramblings. 1.5/5

Movie Nation - All you need for a good thriller are some striking settings and two good actors debating, posturing and convincing us they want to kill each other. 3/4

New York Observer - Posing as a bogus thriller without one line of believable dialogue or one single thrill, Mojave is 93 minutes of gibberish with guns and phony literary pretentiousness about two thugs in a duel of weapons and words that goes nowhere fast. 0/4
 
Weekend Box Office:

THE REVENANT Survives Storm Jonas to Win Weekend With $16 Million

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Alejandro G. Inarritu's awards frontrunner The Revenant rode to the top of the box-office chart in its third weekend in wide release — the first time the movie has come in No. 1. The frontier epic, starring DiCaprio, grossed $16 million from 3,711 theaters for a domestic total of $119.2 million for Fox and New Regency.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens is set to come in No. 2 with roughly $13 million for a domestic total of $878 million-plus.

The Revenant and other films faced a formidable foe this weekend in winter storm Jonas, which buried a large swath of the Northeast corridor in two feet of snow or more. Three hundred to 400 theaters on the East Coast and in North Carolina were forced to close, including in New York City, a pivotal market that contributes as much as 7 percent of the overall box-office gross. Analysts project that weekend revenue could be down as much as 12 percent because of Jonas.

Zac Efron and Robert De Niro's Dirty Grandpa fared the best among the new releases with $11.5 million from 3,192 theaters. The movie, coming in No. 4, was decimated by critics but fared somewhat better with audiences, who gave it a B CinemaScore.

The Boy, fueled by younger females and Hispanics (41 percent), grossed $11.2 million from 2,671 theaters. Directed by William Brent Bell, the movie is the third release from STX Entertainment, which partnered with Lakeshore on the $10 million movie.

Sony's 5th Wave, starring Chloe Grace Moretz, came in No. 6 with an estimated $10.3 million from 2,908 locations. That's a disappointing start, considering the $38 million movie was intended to launch a new YA film franchise. However, the film is faring better overseas, earning $15.9 million over the weekend from 55 territories for a foreign total of $27 million.

Box Office: 'The Revenant' Survives Storm Jonas to Win Weekend With $16M
 
In Limited Theaters and YouTube Red (Jan. 27)



LAZER TEAM

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Release: January 27, 2016

Genre: Science Fiction Action Comedy

Director: Matt Hulum (feature film directorial debut)

Cast: Burnie Burns, Gavin Free, Michael Jones, Colton Dunn, Allie DeBerry, and Alan Ritchson

Synopsis: When four small-town losers stumble across an alien crash site containing an incredible battle suit, they soon find themselves responsible for the fate of the entire planet. With this new alien equipment genetically bound to them, and the government hot on their heels, the foursome have no choice but to work together as one to save humanity. All they have to do is learn to use a strange alien device meant for only one-person, train for a battle against an omnipotent enemy, and not kill each other in the process.



Comments: Lazer Team was mostly funded by a crowdfunding campaign that raised a record $2.48 million from 37,497 funders in a month on the Indiegogo site.
 
In Theaters Nationwide (Jan. 29)



KUNG FU PANDA 3

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Release: January 29, 2016

Genre: Computer-Animated Adventure Comedy

Director: Jennifer Yuh Nelson (Kung Fu Panda 2) and Alessandro Carloni

Cast: Jack Black, Angelina Jolie, Dustin Hoffman, Jackie Chan, Seth Rogen, Lucy Liu, David Cross, James Hong, Bryan Cranston, Kate Hudson, and J. K. Simmons

Synopsis: When Po's long-lost panda father suddenly reappears, the reunited duo travels to a secret panda paradise to meet scores of hilarious new panda characters. But when the supernatural villain Kai begins to sweep across China defeating all the kung fu masters, Po must do the impossible-learn to train a village full of his fun-loving, clumsy brethren to become the ultimate band of Kung Fu Pandas.


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THE FINEST HOURS

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Release: January 29, 2016

Genre: Historical Thriller Drama

Director: Craig Gillespie (Fright Night)

Cast: Chris Pine, Casey Affleck, Ben Foster, Eric Bana, Holliday Grainger and Kyle Gallner

Synopsis: In February of 1952, one of the worst storms to ever hit the East Coast struck New England, damaging an oil tanker off the coast of Cape Cod and literally ripping it in half. On a small lifeboat faced with frigid temperatures and 70-foot high waves, four members of the Coast Guard set out to rescue the more than 30 stranded sailors trapped aboard the rapidly-sinking vessel.


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FIFTY SHADES OF BLACK

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Release: January 29, 2016

Genre: Parody Comedy

Director: Michael Tiddes (A Haunted House 2)

Cast: Marlon Wayans, Jane Seymour, Mike Epps, Kali Hawk, and Fred Willard

Synopsis: An inexperienced college student meets a wealthy businessman whose sexual practices put a strain on their relationship. A parody of the popular film/novel 50 Shades of Gray.


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JANE GOT A GUN **Interested.. sort of**

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Release: Aug. 29, 2014
Feb. 20, 2015
Sept. 4, 2015

January 29, 2016

Genre: Western Action Drama

Director: Lynne Ramsay (We Need to Talk About Kevin)
Gavin O'Connor (Warrior)

Cast: Natalie Portman, Michael Fassbender Joel Edgerton, Bradley Cooper Ewan McGregor, Rodrigo Santoro, Noah Emmerich, Boyd Holbrook

Synopsis: With help from her former lover (Joel Edgerton), a woman (Natalie Portman) tries to save her husband (Noah Emmerich) from a gang of killers in the Old West.



Comments: I've been following the rocky progress of this film from the start. To read more of the film's tumultuous history, click HERE.
 
Critics' Reviews for THE 5TH WAVE

Rotten Tomatoes: 19% Approval Rating (15 out of 77 critics like it)

Consensus: With unimpressive effects and plot points seemingly pieced together from previous dystopian YA sci-fi films, The 5th Wave ends up feeling like more of a limp, derivative wriggle.

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Rolling Stone - the only standout in the cast besides Moretz is Maika Monroe (It Follows) as a Goth fighter with no patience for pussies. Jeez, if only Monroe and Mortez had been allowed to take over. Instead, here's another dystopian washout. 1/4

Entertainment Weekly - The frankly preposterous nature of the film’s setup is rendered slightly less so by a couple of second act reveals. But, by then, many viewers will have lost interest in a movie with a very high bodycount but a very small amount of grit, either emotional or literal. C+

San Francisco Chronicle - Have you ever dreamed with your eyes open? Have you ever sat in a theater wondering who keeps snoring, only to wonder if it might be you? There are new experiences to be had here, not experiences that you'd want, but experiences. 1/4

Empire Magazine - Everything that comes after the confident, dangerous first half-hour just makes you pine for what could have been as this devolves into ten-a-penny teen-lit sludge. 2/5

SciFiNow - The film still manages to stand out from the cornucopia of other YA sci-fi adaptations, and its successes are largely down to the excellent Moretz in the leading role. 3/5


omg! this was as bad as jupiter ascending, it's like some giggly teenagers wrote the script
 
Critics' Reviews for KUNG FU PANDA 3

Rotten Tomatoes: 79% Approval Rating (54 out of 68 critics like it)

Consensus: Kung Fu Panda 3 boasts the requisite visual splendor, but like its rotund protagonist, this sequel's narrative is also surprisingly nimble, adding up to animated fun for the whole family.

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Entertainment Weekly - Just complicated enough to reward steady viewers and just simple enough for parent escorts to enjoy without much prior knowledge. B

USA Today - While it lacks the wonder and nuance of earlier Pandas, there are enough new faces and wowing, Asian-influenced style to also keep parents amused for an hour and a half. 2.5/4

San Francisco Chronicle - "Kung Fu Panda 3" has a moment or two for everyone, but no chance develop any character beyond a single dimension. The next scene has often arrived before the viewer can process the last one. 2/4

Toronto Star
- Black and white and fun all over, Kung Fu Panda 3 achieves best-of-franchise status with a story that goes deeper than typical kid fare, wrapped in beautifully crafted animation. 3/4

CinemaBlend.com - A vividly entertaining adventure story with beautiful animation and a solid way to continue the arc of the titular protagonist. 3.5/5
 
Critics' Reviews for THE FINEST HOURS

Rotten Tomatoes: 59% Approval Rating (57 out of 95 critics like it)

Consensus: Old-fashioned to a fault, The Finest Hours will satisfy those seeking a traditional rescue drama - but may leave more adventurous viewers wanting more.

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James Berardinelli - The film is a fast-paced thriller guaranteed to get the blood coursing and the adrenaline flowing. Hampered primarily by cheesy dialogue and clichéd subplots, the movie as a whole is significantly better fare than what normally reaches multiplexes during January. 3/4

Entertainment Weekly - While its first-act romance has a sweetly nostalgic, Andy Hardy glow, and its high-seas action sequences are mildly thrilling, The Finest Hours ultimately feels too harmless and predictable to fully surrender to. C+

Rolling Stone - Director Craig Gillespie only gets his mojo working when he jettisons the bilge in the script that keeps flashing back to Webber's romance with Miriam. On the waves, the film finally finds its sea legs and delivers an old-school adventure based on a heroic deliverance that deserves its day in the sun. 3/4

Newsday - A remarkable tale, confusingly told. Impressive storm sequences and a very good Pine almost save the day. The script is a confusing deluge of maritime terminology. The result is discombobulation rather than white-knuckle tension. 2/4

Richard Roeper - If only “The Finest Hours” had a screenplay worthy of the heroics depicted here, and a director who could have resisted wave after wave of schmaltz and melodrama.The heroism of that small-boat crew from 1952 deserves a special film. This is not it. 2/4
 
Critics' Reviews for FIFTY SHADES OF BLACK

Rotten Tomatoes: 14% Approval Rating (2 out of 14 critics like it)

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NOW Toronto - If there were ever a purpose to these crass, imbecilic parodies, it's to remind us that the closest black actors come to starring in something like Scream, Paranormal Activity or Fifty Shades Of Grey is when Marlon Wayans spoofs them. 2/5

AV Club - If comedy is like sex, all about buildup and release of tension, then this movie can't get it up. So if you think weird tongue stuff and exaggerated genital protheses are hilarious, this might be a mildly amusing 92 minutes. C-

RogerEbert.com - But I will say this for “Fifty Shades of Black”: It made me laugh more often than I did in “Dirty Grandpa.” That is to say, I laughed more than once. And you really can’t ask for more than that in January. 1.5/4

Blu-ray.com - On the bright side, at least this isn't "A Haunted House 3." Just kidding. There's no such thing as a bright side when dealing with a Marlon Wayans production. F

CinemaBlend.com - I wasn't the only one in the theater. There were five people, total. Two walked out fifteen minutes in. Another left fifteen minutes after that. When I walked out, a dude saw what movie I was leaving of and laughed at me. That about sums it up. 1/5
 
Critics' Reviews for JANE GOT A GUN

Rotten Tomatoes: 40% Approval Rating (6 out of 15 critics like it)

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Entertainment Weekly - Jane Got a Gun is a slow fuse of a film that burns to a whimper instead of an explosion. Even with its relatively svelte 97-minute running time, O’Connor’s dirge-like oater takes what feels like an eternity to build to its inevitable climactic spasm of bloodshed. C

We Got This Covered - Jane Got A Gun shows momentary glimpses into low-key excitement, but the movie is too languidly structured and without captivating enough characters to result in the satisfyingly succinct burst of entertainment that its title suggests. 4/10

Blu-ray.com - Perhaps greatness was never in the cards for the production, but it manages to stand on its own two feet, with a mournful atmosphere that's nicely handled by the cast and crew, who try to make sense of an impossible creative situation. B-

Newsday - A Western with potential for feminist table-turning and old-fashioned violence, "Jane Got a Gun" is a major letdown. Despite being co-produced by Portman, the movie sells her character short at nearly every turn. 2/4

CinemaBlend.com - Rejuvenated by a powerful revelation that then propels it into a rousing finale, you'll ultimately have been captivated and entertained enough to conclude that Jane Got A Gun was more bullet than blank. 3.5/5
 
Friday Box Office:

KUNG FU PANDA 3 Capsizes THE FINEST HOURS with $10.5 Million


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DreamWorks Animation's Kung Fu Panda 3 climbed to the top of the Friday box office with an estimated $10.5 million for a projected $40 million-plus opening in North America. Kung Fu Panda 3, costing around $145 million to produce, also earned an A CinemaScore.

Kung Fu Panda 3 is the first studio animated event film of 2014, and was produced by DWA and Oriental DreamWorks, with backing from the China Film Group. It's the first major Hollywood studio release to open day and date in the U.S. and in China.

Elsewhere, Disney's Coast Guard adventure-disaster film The Finest Hours, starring Chris Pine and Casey Affleck, has hit choppy waters in its launch. The movie is expected to open to $10 million after grossing $3.3 million from 3,143 locations on Friday, a disappointing start considering it cost $70 million to produce.

Fifty Shades of Black, spoofing Fifty Shades of Grey, is also opening in the U.S., where it's looking to come in No. 10 with a $6 million weekend, behind expectations. On Friday, the movie grossed an estimated $2.2 million from 2,075 theaters after earning a C CinemaScore. The good news: The parody cost a modest $5 million to make

Box Office: 'Kung Fu Panda 3' Capsizes 'Finest Hours,' 'Fifty Shades of Black'
 
I liked Kung-fu Panda 3 , more of the same in that it's Po overcoming another super-powered Kung-fu villain with an extra element. Looked good and had good pacing

Solid 7/10
 
Please tell me we're taking that boat to a bigger boat.

That's a great line, I tell you what.
 
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