Dealing with emotions after getting DESTROYED in sparring...

If I fought up to my abilities then it's no big deal the guy is just better and I'll get there if I keep on working. But if I kind of freeze and just try not to get beat up to much (which happens rarely but it happened) then I'm disappointed in myself.
 
One of the first times I sparred MT I got worked pretty good by a guy who had an MT and Kyokushin background. We weren't going all out, but he destroyed my lead leg and gave me a good shiner. I should have taken the next day off but I was stubborn and didn't want to be the guy who didn't show up the day after a beating. Near the end of the class the next day I got sloppy, dropped my left hand, walked into a solid cross and got dropped for the first time. Goddammit, now I had to show up the next day too. Thankfully made it through the session without incident and earned my self a day off.
 
Flexwave2003 said:
Well you know there are differents levels of sparring.

If you're Ray Sefo the kind of sparring you're doing should be different than kid joe from Sherdog.com.

Are you training to be a professional? Or are you just wanting to get a fancy looking belt around your waist?

Bottom line to it, no matter if you're in Kims tae kwon do class or Joes boxing gym there will be winners and losers. But if you're a lamb playing with lions, you either learn to be a lion quickly or become dinner every evening at the gym.
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You make an amazing point that everyone should take not of. Sometimes the fastest way to get better, is to go up against people mulitple times better than you. Be it sports, combat sports, illegal street racing. If your up against people at your own level, the chances of your skills increasing with any rapidity are quite slim. Take the hits and learn.
 
Eh if I get played around with/destroyed after a sparring session I just get angry at myself because 1) I could have done better 2) I realized my mistakes and 3) I am competitive. Usually I analyze what I did wrong and work on it through heavy bags/pads
 
It's fine dude honestly, I've been there plenty of times. What helps he is the way I look at it. I try to think of it as a game, which it is. If you lost at a basketball game you wouldn't be nearly as upset would you? Well it helps me hope it means somthing to you.
 
Yeah I think this is pretty common, especially when you invest so much time and effort into working defense and improving - then you get outclassed during sparring and realize you have so much more to work on. It can be frustrating because you feel you let yourself down, some guys are just more emotional than others as well, just don't let it bottom you out where you want to quit. I think it can provide motivation and shows you care, I've had sparring sessions that shook me up too.
 
I love getting beat up in sparring. That means I am fighting better guys then me and I will get better. A few weeks back, I sparred with this dude Dustin who is about 6'4"-6'5" and ways about 240ish. He is a true HW. I am 5'8" 185ish (fight 170, 155 if I wanted). He beat the piss out of me. He also has a rep fro throwing a little harder than needed (he knocked out a dude the next week while Sparring). I was happy, I took everything he gave me and managed to give some of my own. I always try to find the biggest and/or best guy to spar with.

Now losing in competition is different. I have been known to get emotional over a loss. When I wrestled in high school I was pretty bad. Now I have my moment (good or bad) right after the match and then move on.
 
1Strike said:
If you never get outclassed , then it only means you aren't sparring the right people.
.
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QFT

heard somewhere that if you're the best guy in your gym, and you want to get better, it's time to find another gym
 
Straw_Dog said:
One of the first times I sparred MT I got worked pretty good by a guy who had an MT and Kyokushin background. We weren't going all out, but he destroyed my lead leg and gave me a good shiner. I should have taken the next day off but I was stubborn and didn't want to be the guy who didn't show up the day after a beating. Near the end of the class the next day I got sloppy, dropped my left hand, walked into a solid cross and got dropped for the first time. Goddammit, now I had to show up the next day too. Thankfully made it through the session without incident and earned my self a day off.
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i know what you mean. the first sparring class i ever had was at 8:30pm and i had to be up at 5 am for work. i told myself i would do a round or two and then leave early. i had my second round at just before 9 and got worked really hard. i didnt wanna look like i gave up and went home after that so i stayed until 10 and felt like shit the next morning
 
yeah, one time I got real nervous sparring this middleweight that almost knocked me out before. I felt so ashamed I asked him to give me about 10 hard leg kicks to my lead leg. Couldn't walk right for days after that. I let that be my motivation to not bitch out anymore.
 
Nobody is bulletproof, we all get beaten at some point. It's all about training hard and coming back.

"Failure defeats losers but inspires winners"
 
The best way to deal with it imo is to think what went wrong and to make sure you don't commit the same mistakes the next time. Don't think of the outcome of sparring sessions as whether you won ot lost, always strive to learn more and improve. If you go to the gym having the mentality that you're not gonna 'lose' then you're only hurting your progress.
 
mmayweather fan said:
I am wondering do you guys go through emotions and I hate to say the "C" word :icon_cry2


For example I always thought of myself a poor mans mayweather and had some decent boxing skills but this new guy just absolutly murderd me where when we where doing the last round of sparring I was backpaddeling and getting caught dropped.



After the sparring I felt so much SHAME!!! that I just felt like a coward and it just was very very humbleing exprience. Thankfuly I didnt show the tears in sparring but after washing my face off my coach told me that its not unsual to get emotional and he said its more common then I think it is.


Now I am wondering have you guys went through it and also how do deal with this.

The very main reason I ask is this is I am trying to be professional not just in skill but in attitude as well and I dont want to act like some douche later down the road if I do get in to competion and if I do lose then I want to be professional enough to stick around and not disrespect anyone after the fight.


I am saying this not because I am trying to be a wimp or learn to become a good loser or some shit like that I say this because its part of being a professional. I would like to be a professional both inside and outside the competion.
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I feel you on this... I started doing BJJ and MMA when I was 14. When youre a kid, you get really butt-hurt when you lose or having a losing streak. My teachers were pretty tight in not acting out emotionally but rather, breathing, staying calm, and learning what you did wrong.
But the very fact that you want to control your reaction shows you have good character. Props
 
Getting out-pointed its pretty humbling. I don't mind getting tapped left and right in grappling but there is just something about getting repeatedly peppered in the face and not being able to do anything about it that will make anyone feel uneasy.

I remember when I first started out I was almost in the same boat, if I got wrecked in sparring (which was often back then) it would totally carry over afterwards and ruin my day. Nowadays I don't mind it so much (providing the other guy isn't a cocky shit). If I get roughed up I ask the guy I was sparring with what flaws he saw in my game. After that I'm usually so focus on correcting my mistakes too be pissed. If the guy is a cocky shit, I patiently wait till grappling to extract my revenge :icon_twis
 
Dude the guys who can totally outclass you and can give you a good beating are the best sparring partners you can find. These guys exist to knock some sense into your head and to liberate you from delusions that you are already super-tough. Self-satisfaction is the biggest brake on evolving. Any fighter must constantly improve. Think about it as a some sort of exclusive service given to you. When you stop being afraid of losing and simply admit that you are not the toughest one and you need to learn a lot of stuff the real progress will start. And who knows maybe some day you'll become the toughest.

Well I'd say this probability is quite small but at least you'll become tougher than you are now.
 
The First few months of training MMa i got my ass hadned to me with every sparring match cause i would go againts guys i knew could kick my ass and i wanted to learn from it to get better and after about 6 months i was really good and the first few times i lost i got emotinal because i got like 10 punches in and i got hit like 100 times and everytime i did something i would get taken down or kicked and with every sparring match you get better and you understand more.
 
Keep it up, I like to think of myself as a poor mans Pernell Whitaker.
But one day I got caught and rocked by some beginner.
I hate to say it but this guy sucks, throws huge right over hands while ducking his head (you know the kind), so I was ashamed getting hit like that by him.
 
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