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Do you think it really exists in relationships between individuals? I'm sure the short answer is yes, but I always thought at the end of the day, humans are all humans and we can connect no matter what.
I don't think cultural differences really exist if two people are utterly self-aware and know where their values, beliefs, and behaviors come from, are open to having their perspectives challenged, accept other viewpoints, and are willing to communicate honestly and openly. We are all products of our environment and it's up to us to be aware of what shaped us in order to free ourselves from the boxes we come from. Culture is also a fluid and constantly changing thing anyway. Two individuals can create their own culture between them. Like Inside jokes for example.
After all, two people from the same culture have differences and have trouble understanding each other all the time. And there are many kinds of differences like between generations, men and women, class, regions, religions, etc. I'm sure I'd have more in common with some middle class dude close to my age in Rwanda than a 20 year girl from a wealthy family in my country. I've had the best relationships with women from countries I never been to and have little cultural knowledge of.
But I have also made the mistake of trying to talk with honesty and self-awareness with people from different cultures. I think cultural differences do exist if they are not able to do this.
I wondered if I traveled back to Roman times, if I would be able to understand the way people think and act even if I spoke fluent Latin. Imagine trying to explain to ancient Romans why you're uncomfortable with slavery.
Once hung out with a Japanese dude for a week going out and drinking together and I couldn't figure out if we were friends after or not. He seemed to keep a sort of an emotional distance or wall despite the time we spent together. People have told me this is a Japanese thing.
I once dated a Korean woman who insisted that I cut off all of my female contacts except family once we became official. She said that's what you're supposed to do when you enter a relationship and if I was Korean, I would understand this and do it without question. She also got extremely jealous that I hug my female friends, which is normal for me. She insisted that hugging was sexual and westerners hug because they always think about sex lol. And instead of having a conversation about our differences and trying to find a compromise, she stated that how I do things is wrong and she's right. Needless to say the relationship didn't last well or long.
Some people refuse to change their minds about anything. "This is how I was raised, so this is how it's going to be."
I have friends from all over the world but most of the people in my social network happen to be people with "Western" values like mine, but I wonder if it's more of a logistical reason: Westerners tend to have more money and leisure time to travel and speak better English than people from other parts of the world. Since I travel and my primary language is English, I meet more people "like me."
What do you guys think? Do you think that cultural differences can run so deep that two people can't understand each other?
I don't think cultural differences really exist if two people are utterly self-aware and know where their values, beliefs, and behaviors come from, are open to having their perspectives challenged, accept other viewpoints, and are willing to communicate honestly and openly. We are all products of our environment and it's up to us to be aware of what shaped us in order to free ourselves from the boxes we come from. Culture is also a fluid and constantly changing thing anyway. Two individuals can create their own culture between them. Like Inside jokes for example.
After all, two people from the same culture have differences and have trouble understanding each other all the time. And there are many kinds of differences like between generations, men and women, class, regions, religions, etc. I'm sure I'd have more in common with some middle class dude close to my age in Rwanda than a 20 year girl from a wealthy family in my country. I've had the best relationships with women from countries I never been to and have little cultural knowledge of.
But I have also made the mistake of trying to talk with honesty and self-awareness with people from different cultures. I think cultural differences do exist if they are not able to do this.
I wondered if I traveled back to Roman times, if I would be able to understand the way people think and act even if I spoke fluent Latin. Imagine trying to explain to ancient Romans why you're uncomfortable with slavery.
Once hung out with a Japanese dude for a week going out and drinking together and I couldn't figure out if we were friends after or not. He seemed to keep a sort of an emotional distance or wall despite the time we spent together. People have told me this is a Japanese thing.
I once dated a Korean woman who insisted that I cut off all of my female contacts except family once we became official. She said that's what you're supposed to do when you enter a relationship and if I was Korean, I would understand this and do it without question. She also got extremely jealous that I hug my female friends, which is normal for me. She insisted that hugging was sexual and westerners hug because they always think about sex lol. And instead of having a conversation about our differences and trying to find a compromise, she stated that how I do things is wrong and she's right. Needless to say the relationship didn't last well or long.
Some people refuse to change their minds about anything. "This is how I was raised, so this is how it's going to be."
I have friends from all over the world but most of the people in my social network happen to be people with "Western" values like mine, but I wonder if it's more of a logistical reason: Westerners tend to have more money and leisure time to travel and speak better English than people from other parts of the world. Since I travel and my primary language is English, I meet more people "like me."
What do you guys think? Do you think that cultural differences can run so deep that two people can't understand each other?
