BREAKING: Rolling Stones Guitarist Keith Richards Found Still Alive

Jermei · Dec 28, 2016

Multiple sources are confirming that Keith Richards is still alive...

Tamriel Terror · Dec 28, 2016

Why does he look like a 90 year old Jack Sparrow who is high as hell?

OverCoronavirus Pressure · Dec 28, 2016

Tamriel Terror said:
Why does he look like a 90 year old Jack Sparrow who is high as hell?

Lots of chemical amusement aid, plus preservatives

pacifikan · Dec 28, 2016

Hes being kept "alive" by a malicious parasite. The Keith Richards we all knew and loved has been dead for a long time.

MarloStanfield · Dec 28, 2016

not a very credible source

irish_thug · Dec 28, 2016

A buddy of mine has a theory that Kieth Richards has been keeping himself alive by eating the souls of other celebrities. Hence 2016.

PG29 red0 Jr · Dec 28, 2016

I lol'd, 4/10

Peteyandjia · Dec 28, 2016

^^
Still a few days left, knock on (Ron) wood...

Luger · Dec 28, 2016

Cher and Keith will need a nuke to disappear

neverwas · Dec 28, 2016

Peteyandjia said:
^^
Still a few days left, knock on (Ron) wood...

for various reasons this makes me laugh.

Loiosh · Dec 28, 2016

Peteyandjia said:
^^
Still a few days left, knock on (Ron) wood...

Holy shit, who the fuck taunts 2016?