Q: How do I gain weight:
A: There are a couple of factors to gaining weight. Eat big but eat clean, lots of whole grains, lots of leafy greens, lots of lean protein, simple carbs in moderation. At least 5-7 meals per day. Snack on things like almonds and yogurt, things with good calories and high nutritious value. If your numbers of calories in is greater than your calories out, you should be gaining weight. If you're eating is clean, you should be gaining lean muscle. Lift BIG. Lots of guys think they lift heavy and really haven't scratched the surface of what their body is capable of. Big weight = big muscles. And get AMPLE rest. 7-8 hours of UNINTERRUPTED sleep per night, and on your days off at-least have one day where you barely move. Your body needs to heal to grow.
Q: But I do all of that and still can't gain any weight. I MUST be a hardgainer! Right? Don't I need some supplement like GAKIC, LEUKIC, or some high-end Creatine to give me that edge I need?
A: No, what you are is either a liar, or delusional about your eating or lifting. You cannot do everything perfect and NOT gain any weight. It just doesn't work that way. You're botching it up somewhere. Supplementing aside, your eating and your workouts are where all the real progress is made.
Q: Okay okay, I admit I don't eat that clean. But why is clean eating so important? Surely I will get bigger eating pizza and McDonalds, I mean their food is loaded with calories right? And if I had a whole bag of Doritos, that's like a billion calories!! Shouldn't I get bigger?
A: *sigh* You may end up getting fatter. And before you ask no fat does NOT turn into muscle. Fat is fat, muscle is muscle. Completely different molecules that never BECOME each other. And NO you DO NOT want to get fatter, before you say it. You want to put on lean and healthy bodyweight. Getting fatter comes with a laundry-list of health problems. Here, read this: ****bolic Function For Dummies.
Q: ****bolic Advantages!?!?! Surely that's all nonsense. Isn't a calorie just a calorie?
A: NO. And don't you come in here spouting that AHA bullshit. Any organization such as the American Heart Association and their Nutritional Committee that puts their "Heart Healthy" stamp of approval on a box of fucking Lucky Charms is NOT to be trusted. There's a whole world of true information out there, you'd be wise to look into it.