1. Come join Sherdog writers Ant Walker and Jason Burgos for our live video chat series called "The Trenches," live now, click here!

Any good CV writers? Need help with personal profile

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by Panmisiek, Dec 28, 2016.

  1. Panmisiek

    Panmisiek Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2015
    Messages:
    2,929
    Likes Received:
    3,794
    I need to redo that sentence:

    A responsible and hardworking individual with 2 years of experience within HR environment mainly employee relations. Currently seeks...

    The second sentence is only indicator what else I am planning to add.

    Can someone help me make that sentence to feel more "alive"?
     
  2. Tamriel Terror

    Tamriel Terror Silver Belt

    Joined:
    Aug 21, 2014
    Messages:
    10,857
    Likes Received:
    35,835
    A responsible and hardworking individual with two years of experience within the human resource environment with a focus on employee relations.

    could that be better? I'm not a english major though
     
    Panmisiek likes this.
  3. Panmisiek

    Panmisiek Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2015
    Messages:
    2,929
    Likes Received:
    3,794
    Oh yes kind sir. Thats sounds better
     
  4. 22k

    22k ベルセルク Yellow Card

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2008
    Messages:
    27,298
    Likes Received:
    34,277
    Location:
    New York
    A responsible and hardworking individual with 2 years of experience as an HR professional, I also possess a strong post count to likes ratio on Sherdog.com in my first year at a Green Belt level (1,474 posts, 1,621 likes, with Dec. 20, 2015 being my join date). I also intend to go 'Plat' soon too.

    I can provide references with dick pics all the way up to the Senior Administrator level if necessary.

    & go on from there. you got this bro.
     
    Tamriel Terror and Zer like this.
  5. Dolomite

    Dolomite Red Belt

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2005
    Messages:
    9,134
    Likes Received:
    3,960
    1. Problem / issue
    2. How you murdered it
    Keep it short & sweet & simple.

    Try and make every statement on your rez tell the story of how the Mongols devoured Europe.
    - responsible and hardworking = too bland; Try "flexible, team-oriented leader"
    - individual with 2 years of experience = Individual? No, just no. Your paltry two years of experience needs to be expressed fiscally; "For the last 8 fiscal quarters..." or some such shit (have figures at the ready to back that shit up).
    - within HR environment mainly employee relations = Are you trying to send me into a rage?
    No - instead you were recognized for your strong interpersonal skills and awarded a position within the team plugging the holes left by others. And this all equals dramatic & visible savings (show that you KNOW that your work is connected to your company's bottom line).
     
    Last edited: Dec 28, 2016
    Panmisiek and Kneepocalypse like this.
  6. Zer

    Zer Gold Belt

    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2010
    Messages:
    21,778
    Likes Received:
    57,536
    'Experience with employee relations' makes it sound like you bang your co-workers bro. Depending on the interviewer that could end very badly, or very well indeed.
     
    Tamriel Terror, Exi and 22k like this.
  7. Codger

    Codger Brown Belt

    Joined:
    Sep 4, 2014
    Messages:
    2,793
    Likes Received:
    1,600
    I wouldn't say "two years OF experience". I'd say " with two years experience"
     
  8. Luger

    Luger Rabbi of Platinum Nation Banned

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2013
    Messages:
    19,671
    Likes Received:
    24,616
    Location:
    The Synagogue of Platinum Nation
    Make one out of nowhere sentence.
    For an example "I need to leave early on fridays, as I am a boozer" or something like that.
    It actually works. Your CV will stand out.
    You'll come off as honest.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.