2017 PotWR Round 3: The Jungle Primary

[Limbo Pete]

11 Reasons To Vote Vivarevolution 2018


"You've Done Worse, and You Know It"



Who are you voting for in November? Many people aren't thrilled with the major party candidates this year, but thankfully, there are other options. One passionate activist and candidate, Vivarevolution, has been running for President, and he has some very unique views. If you are having trouble supporting the lesser of two evils, here's why Vivarevolution may be the candidate for you.



1. His incredible and distinct fashion sense







Want a change from the traditional image of the President? Vivarevolutions signature boot hat is like nothing this country has seen before.



2. A free pony for every American




Vivarevolution's pony policy is a job creation program that will help combat lack of public transportation and climate change by reducing fossil fuel consumption. And who doesn't want a free pony?



3. Mandatory toothbrushing laws







Ever talked to someone with bad breath? Not on President Viva's watch!



4. Zombie apocalypse awareness





Not only will Viva make sure the U.S. is prepared for the zombie apocalypse, he will harness zombie power using the latest in hamster-wheel technology.



5. Federally funded time travel research

Vivarevolution is the only candidate who "will go back in time and kill baby Hitler before he’s even born."


6. Monkey tooth fairies







Viva has mentioned his idea of genetically engineering a race of winged monkeys to act as tooth fairies.



7. His honesty








Vivarevolution is a self-proclaimed "friendly fascist" with a refreshing honesty. Supreme says he is a politician who will lie and "promise your electorate heart anything you desire" because he has no reason not to. Hey, at least he's willing to admit it.



8. He's multitalented







Mr. Viva's closing statement at the WR town hall including an original song about himself set to the tune of the chicken dance.



9. He glitter-bombed politician Randall Terry who opposed same-sex marriage during a party debate





He actually threw glitter on him during a Democratic party debate. Enough said.



10. He's dedicated





Viva has been running in local, state and national elections since the 1980s!



11. Why not?

Crazy old guy with a boot on his head?
You've just about got my vote locked in.

 

[VivaRevolution]

Crazy old guy with a boot on his head?
You've just about got my vote locked in.

And who doesn't want genetically engineered monkey tooth fairies, and a pony......

 

[VivaRevolution]

And who doesn't want genetically engineered monkey tooth fairies, and a pony......

Communists, that's who

 

[Limbo Pete]

You're speakin my language, Viva

 

[VivaRevolution]

Gingivitis has been eroding the gum line of this great nation long enough, it must be stopped. For too long this country has been suffering a great moral and oral decay – in spirit and incisors. A country’s future depends on its – on its ability to bite back. We can no longer be a nation indentured. Our very salivation is at stake.

Together we must brace ourselves as we cross over to the bridgework into the 23rd century. Let us bite the bullet and together make America a sea of shining smiles, from sea to shiny sea.

Now friends, some people will tell you that this mandatory tooth brushing law is about the secret dental police kicking down your door to make sure you’ve brushed. Friends. It is not.

Some will mention the dental re-education centres or the preventative dental maintenance detention facilities. It’s about none of these things. It is not about the government issued toothpaste containing an addictive yet harmless substance. No friends. It is not even about DNA gene splicing to create a race of winged monkeys to act as tooth fairies.

Friends what this mandatory tooth brushing law is really about is strong teeth for a strong America.

My name is Vivarevolution. I’m a friendly fascist, a tyrant you can trust and you should let me run your life because I do know what is best for you. Yes I’m a politician and I will promise you anything your electoral heart desires because you are my constituents, you are the informed voting public and because I have no intention of keeping any promise that I make.

Vote Early. Vote Often. Remember a vote for Vermin Supreme is a vote completely thrown away. I would like to take this moment to acknowledge my mother who is in the audience here today, please stand up, mother, please stand up, ummm, if you can stand up, please stand up. She’s gonna try to stand up so you can acknowledge her. This is – this is my mother. There you go. And five years ago this April, I gave her a kidney. My challenge to you people, everybody on the stage and everybody in the audience, give up a kidney

 

[VivaRevolution]

Lol @Palis voting for @JDragon.

 

[uppercutbus]

How am I supposed to strategically vote against the leftist Trudeau/Merkel fans if I can't see the vote numbers before committing to a vote?

I don't want my vote to be the knife edge that got an open border supporter in.

 

[irish_thug]

How am I supposed to strategically vote against the leftist Trudeau/Merkel fans if I can't see the vote numbers before committing to a vote?

I don't want my vote to be the knife edge that got an open border supporter in.

Right here bud.

 

[luckyshot]

Gee, look at that, if we added up the votes of @HomerThompson @Rational Poster @Quipling @Falsedawn @JDragon , etc., the left leaning candidate would be the top vote getter so far.

But instead we’re going to divide the vote 10 ways and hand the election to the spam poster @pcptornado (nothing against you, I’m still a fan) and the center right candidate @irish_thug (nothing against you either).

Who could have POSSIBLY predicted this outcome?

@Lead you still say the Jungle Primary format doesn’t give a huge advantage to ideological outliers?

See the problem of waiting to see how things shake out @Jack V Savage , etc.?

 

[Gandhi]

Just make sure GNN doesn't catch you in a harassment scandal.

When mentioning me or my news outlet please @Me. Otherwise excellent post!!!!!

 

[weed]

Spoiler

 

[Gandhi]

Ok I lol’d here

Like

 

[Ruprecht]

Spoiler

Damnit... I'm not that far yet. Grrr.

 

[weed]

Damnit... I'm not that far yet. Grrr.

oh shit! sorry man!

 

[Ruprecht]

oh shit! sorry man!

Eh, serves me right for staying on Sherdog. Usually the War Room is pretty safe outside of the OT thread though.
With that said, I'm logging off to watch the rest.

 

[weed]

Eh, serves me right for staying on Sherdog. Usually the War Room is pretty safe outside of the OT thread though.
With that said, I'm logging off to watch the rest.

haha k, can you edit my initial post you quoted? I spoilered the gif. better late than never I guess

 

[Jack V Savage]

Gee, look at that, if we added up the votes of @HomerThompson @Rational Poster @Quipling @Falsedawn @JDragon , etc., the left leaning candidate would be the top vote getter so far.

But instead we’re going to divide the vote 10 ways and hand the election to the spam poster @pcptornado (nothing against you, I’m still a fan) and the center right candidate @irish_thug (nothing against you either).

Who could have POSSIBLY predicted this outcome?

@Lead you still say the Jungle Primary format doesn’t give a huge advantage to ideological outliers?

See the problem of waiting to see how things shake out @Jack V Savage , etc.?

Yes, you're right. Really badly designed system. I thought there was another round of winnowing.

 

[JDragon]

11 Reasons To Vote Vivarevolution 2018


"You've Done Worse, and You Know It"



Who are you voting for in November? Many people aren't thrilled with the major party candidates this year, but thankfully, there are other options. One passionate activist and candidate, Vivarevolution, has been running for President, and he has some very unique views. If you are having trouble supporting the lesser of two evils, here's why Vivarevolution may be the candidate for you.



1. His incredible and distinct fashion sense







Want a change from the traditional image of the President? Vivarevolutions signature boot hat is like nothing this country has seen before.



2. A free pony for every American




Vivarevolution's pony policy is a job creation program that will help combat lack of public transportation and climate change by reducing fossil fuel consumption. And who doesn't want a free pony?



3. Mandatory toothbrushing laws







Ever talked to someone with bad breath? Not on President Viva's watch!



4. Zombie apocalypse awareness





Not only will Viva make sure the U.S. is prepared for the zombie apocalypse, he will harness zombie power using the latest in hamster-wheel technology.



5. Federally funded time travel research

Vivarevolution is the only candidate who "will go back in time and kill baby Hitler before he’s even born."


6. Monkey tooth fairies







Viva has mentioned his idea of genetically engineering a race of winged monkeys to act as tooth fairies.



7. His honesty








Vivarevolution is a self-proclaimed "friendly fascist" with a refreshing honesty. Supreme says he is a politician who will lie and "promise your electorate heart anything you desire" because he has no reason not to. Hey, at least he's willing to admit it.



8. He's multitalented







Mr. Viva's closing statement at the WR town hall including an original song about himself set to the tune of the chicken dance.



9. He glitter-bombed politician Randall Terry who opposed same-sex marriage during a party debate





He actually threw glitter on him during a Democratic party debate. Enough said.



10. He's dedicated





Viva has been running in local, state and national elections since the 1980s!



11. Why not?

So now you're trying the oddball approach and copy-pasting Vermin Supreme?

I'm at least copy-pasting myself.

 

[JDragon]

My name is Vivarevolution. I’m a friendly fascist, a tyrant you can trust and you should let me run your life because I do know what is best for you. Yes I’m a politician and I will promise you anything your electoral heart desires because you are my constituents, you are the informed voting public and because I have no intention of keeping any promise that I make.

Vote Early. Vote Often. Remember a vote for Vermin Supreme is a vote completely thrown away.

 

[Ceez]

So is this the final round right here?