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Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by CauseImbetta, Feb 7, 2018.
Logic class you’re not in a sjw degree for shure.
If you prefer to be tied down to one person and forfeit your freedom and wealth in exchange for emotional support from your partner then there's nothing wrong with that necessarily. It's risky from the standpoint that statistically, over half of marriages end in divorce and that you're in for an emotional and financial beating if you have children and separate but it's your risk to take. I'm sure your confident like every other person ever that you'll be different and your family will last.
However, there's no evidence to suggest that anyone who doesn't want to follow the same life plan is missing out on anything. To be a responsible adult you only need to be self sufficient. Find meaning your own way but don't project your personal values on other people. If they're not hurting anyone it's all good.
There is absolutely a wealth of evidence showing connection to family leads to a happier life and those that don't have that are depressed. Here comes the social constructionists again. There is a reason that human social life has remained relatively the same for thousands and thousands of years: because it's emergent from our biology. But go ahead and be one of the crazy old cat ladies with nothing to show for your life in late age and no one to keep you company but your MGTOW forum.
Haha. It's an elective but no, I'm not. Political science.
Not sure what a hipster playboy lifestyle is but there's nothing wrong with living life the way you want to provided you're not hurting anyone else. You don't need to have a 'screw dem bitches' mentality to do that. Are you suggesting that sex outside of a serious relationship is a bad thing?
Golf? I believe it's still popular as ever.
What is up with the shaming language? Crazy old cat lady? Anyone who doesn't settle down and have a family has nothing to show for their life? If you want a family then no one is stopping you but you've yet to provide a shred of the supposed wealth of evidence to support your claim. What does shaming others who don't want to have a family do for you?
"I have the opposite outlook. There's a lot of freedom in the single life and you can enjoy a variety of tail. A girl gives you lip, you next her, rinse and repeat. The thought of being trapped in a relationship and not being able to do whatever I want due to my responsibilities and duty to my family scares me a lot."
Lol. How does the preferred lifestyle choice above not fit a hipster playboy description? You sound defensive. "Doing whatever I want, you next her, enjoy a variety of tail, rinse repeat"
Trying to say this kind of lifestyle doesn't "hurt anyone else" is living in a pornographers fantasy.
Do you tell girls upfront that if they give you lip you're going to "next her"? (That's such a bad ass word to use by the way, must be a real awesome ladies man) That your going to enjoy a "variety of tail" and "rinse repeat".
If not than your using people which is by definition causing harm. Would you show them this exact thread and you're posting? If not why?
Would you be ok with a sister or niece getting involved with someone with your attitude about women and moving on after getting some tail?
It's just an analogy that we can all relate too buddy, settle down. It's a stereotype and a classic analogy because there's truth in it. You know it, I know it, we all know it. Women that focus on their career while their biological clock ticks, their time to procreate passes them by, and they end up old and alone and semi disturbed, surrounded by cats because they have nothing else.
Well, evidence only just came into the conversation.
Loneliness, depression and sociability in old age
Most of the elderly people were found to be average in the dimension of sociability and preferred remaining engaged in social interactions. The implications of the study are discussed in the article.
Loneliness may lead to serious health-related consequences. It is one of the 3 main factors leading to depression (Green et al., 1992), and an important cause of suicide and suicide attempts. A study carried out by Hansson et al. (1987) revealed that loneliness was related to poor psychological adjustment, dissatisfaction with family and social relationships.
As people grow old, the likelihood of experiencing age-related losses increases. Such losses may impede the maintenance or acquisition of desired relationships, resulting in a higher incidence of loneliness. Many people experience loneliness either as a result of living alone, a lack of close family ties, reduced connections with their culture of origin or an inability to actively participate in the local community activities.
Family support, family income, and happiness: a 10-year perspective.
This study examined the role of 2 central aspects of family life--income and social support--in predicting concurrent happiness and change in happiness among 274 married adults across a 10-year period. The authors used hierarchical linear modeling to investigate the relationship between family income and happiness. Income had a small, positive impact on happiness, which diminished as income increased. In contrast, family social support, measured by 3 subscales, Cohesion, Expressiveness, and Conflict, showed a substantial, positive association with concurrent happiness, even after controlling for income.
For Happiness, Seek Family, Not Fortune
This is an article reflecting on the previous study.
There's nothing new under the sun dude. There's a reason society has naturally arranged itself in the way that is has. If you don't know the connections between family and happiness I'd wager this isn't something you spent much time researching before drawing your conclusions.
Sure, plenty of marriages end in divorce these days. There are a number of factors as to why that is happening, it isn't as simple as "marriages don't work". That is entirely too reductionist and simple minded. Choose a mate you're physically compatible with and discuss values and make sure your values are mostly aligned before tying the knot and your marriage has a much higher chance of being successful.
Good thing there isn’t a section for crypto currency speculator
I don't have a sister or niece to answer that question specifically but I treat women in a way that they like or I wouldn't have success with them. As for telling them up front that I'm going to next them, I don't wear it on my sleeve and bring it up in opening conversation like a weirdo but I also don't lie or hide my intentions. It's probably part of the reason I have success in dating in spite of the fact that I live a modest lifestyle and am openly frugal. Rather than trying to play the white knight and bending to whatever they say, I prefer to remain true and honest.
I'm dating because I want to have sex. If they're not down for that, then 'next' is the operative word. I feel bad for you because I don't think you really believe the things you say about commitment. You try to shame casual sex by tossing around words like 'pornographer' to frame yourself in a morally superior way because you think that's what women want to hear when in reality there are many women who privately enjoy being dominated both physically and mentally.
What you fail to realize is that you can be in a mutually enjoyable relationship with a woman and still not sacrifice your integrity. You don't need to lick boot or pretend to be fine with putting up with their bullshit. If you don't like what someone does, then 'next' is the appropriate response. Both men AND women use each other in relationships and there's nothing necessarily wrong with it.
I'm settled buddy. Try not to get upset and block me this time. The cat lady is a poor analogy because men age better than women. A woman's primary asset is her beauty which fades. Sex appeal is not nearly as important for a man and it's not uncommon to see an old guy with hot young ladies if he has confidence, charisma, and/or money.
1. You don't need to be married in the eyes of the government in order to enjoy a partner. All that you're doing by getting a marriage certificate is setting yourself up for a financial hit if things don't work out. Divorce and alimony adds up. There's nothing to be gained by being married that you can't get otherwise. If you want to ne married, do it, but to claim that all men need a piece of paper from the state for fulfillment isn't true.
2. I question any study that claims to be able to measure happiness. That is very subjective and can be impacted by many variables. I will agree that, at times, being in a relationship brings me happiness but there's no reason I can't experience that without a marriage certificate. Also, if it weren't for family court, I wouldn't be opposed to having more children. As it is, it's simply too risky. If the relationship with mom should go south for any reason then she holds all the cards and the guy is left with 18 years of payments and fighting for limited time with his kids.
Your statement about there being nothing new under the sun isn't entirely true in that modern family court systems are a relatively new thing. 100+ years ago if a woman left her husband it was something to be ashamed of and rightfully so. Nowadays the importance of a strong family unit has been seriously undermined and men in the US no longer have the ability to put a woman in her place when she gets out of line lest the government step in and throw him in jail and take his money.
its not that complicated, leave the world a better place than when you got here (or at least clean up after yourself) and if you have kids raise them right. that's it
To give and be selfless is also quite rewarding, especially when it comes from true compassion.
"Unless suffering is the direct and immediate object of life, our existence must entirely fail of its aim. It is absurd to look upon the enormous amount of pain that abounds everywhere in the world, and originates in needs and necessities inseparable from life itself, as serving no purpose at all and the result of mere chance. Each separate misfortune, as it comes, seems, no doubt, to be something exceptional; but misfortune in general is the rule."
Fuck meaning. People attempt to define their own meaning in a myriad of ways, all in order to avoid facing the true underlying reality of all life.
Ask yourself, what gets you up in the morning? It's not your dreams - your perceived goals. It's something else. Some other mechanism that demands you rise before your delusional conscious desires take hold.
You're a puppet on strings. We all are. Just like all the poor helpless animals you think yourself separate from. Your meaning is to be a cog in a wheel spun by some unseen puppet master.
To think otherwise it to play pretend.
My ikigai is unlocked. I'm unstoppable.
Empty yourself of everything.
Let the mind become still.
The ten thousand things rise and fall while the Self watches their return.
They grow and flourish and then return to the source.
Returning to the source is stillness, which is the way of nature.
The way of nature is unchanging.
Knowing constancy is insight.
Not knowing constancy leads to disaster.
Knowing constancy, the mind is open.
With an open mind, you will be openhearted.
Being openhearted, you will act royally.
Being royal, you will attain the divine.
Being divine, you will be at one with the Tao.
Being at one with the Tao is eternal.
And though the body dies, the Tao will never pass away.