How do we add more shame to our culture?

I've spent the last 3 years shaming myself relentlessly actually. Still doing it

Its been a generally humbling experience, nessasary because I didn't get anything like that growing up

Humans are complex, and we need kinship, honesty, and clarity. But if we choose to instead go into denial, it makes everything harder on everyone, everywhere.
 
Fedorgasm said:
People tend to behave better in cultures where shaming is an effective deterrent.

For example, I saw a video from China where this crosswalk has a camera and a screen, and if you walk at the wrong time then it shows your face on the screen to shame you.

I'm in the US and that would never work here. Too many people just have this belief like, "I don't care. I do what I want." And they have no shame.

Shame works in all other kinds of aspects too. If you're a lazy man that won't get a job, to provide for your family, shame. If you cheat on your spouse, shame. If you shoplift, shame. If you drive drunk, shame.

The shame from society is often a greater deterrent than any legal consequence. And the end result is you have fewer people acting like selfish assholes.

So how do we add more shame to society?
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Yes. Social norms are necessary for a cohesive society and shaming is the enforcement of said norms.

Problem is that consumerism goes against social norms, which is why it doesn’t work in murrka.
 
There is already loads of shame is U.S. culture. It’s just not quite spread around equally. Ask someone who is 16 and pregnant if we have a shaming culture.
 
dildos said:
shaming anyone that is over 21 that still loves pro wrestling is my best bet.
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- I bet you're a Pathetic-ball fan. People only watched this boring trash because Sha-King O'Neal.

We have a meeting at Three O'Clock.
If i get late, can you wait for me? I'm Brazilian, we never arrive on time.

Also no punches in the face, or kicks bellow the waist. We taekwondo patricioners dont know how to defend those!
 
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shinkyoku said:
Is that not already in effect? (although I would have said over 15)
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i said 21 because i only got over pro wrestling when i was a mid teen to early audult.. lets cut it at 21 because that was after benoit one of my fav wrestlers did what he did, one of my others eddie passed 2 years earlier. but i only got cable tv here in australia when i was 15.. if i got it earlier i may have outgrown pro wrestling earlier or could have stuck around longer... but still so when i realised there were so many grown men here you know, like even setting the bar at 25 and that would range to much over. so i gave a bit of leeway.

just my reasoning.. :)
 
LeonardoBjj said:
- I bet you're a Pathetic-ball fan. People only watched this boring trash because Sha-King O'Neal.

We have a meeting at Three O'Clock.
If i get late, can you wait for me? I'm Brazilian, we never arrive on time.

Also no punches in the face, or kicks bellow the waist. We taekwondo patricioners dont know how to defend those!
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i would end you.
 
dildos said:
i said 21 because i only got over pro wrestling when i was a mid teen to early audult.. lets cut it at 21 because that was after benoit one of my fav wrestlers did what he did, one of my others eddie passed 2 years earlier. but i only got cable tv here in australia when i was 15.. if i got it earlier i may have outgrown pro wrestling earlier or could have stuck around longer... but still so when i realised there were so many grown men here you know, like even setting the bar at 25 and that would range to much over. so i gave a bit of leeway.

just my reasoning.. :)
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- The matchs are better today.
 
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djacobox372 said:
I'm not sure you understand what shame means.

Shame is how one views themselves, it's internal.... to "shame" someone is to make them and others aware that they aren't living up to the expectations of society.

Put it in parent-child terms... punishment is when a kid is grounded, "shame" is when a parent tell a kid that they disappointed them.
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Guilt is a private sense that one has failed to live up to their own standards (more individualistic than shame). Shame is more external (to quote Joe Henrich on it: “Shame is rooted in a genetically evolved psychological package that is associated with social devaluation in the eyes of others"). Shame is more connected to social perceptions and values where guilt is more tied to internal values and opinions. . The most successful societies (Western ones) have a much greater emphasis on guilt than on shame. Even within the West, the most successful subregions and individuals put greater emphasis on guilt.
 
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freakroor said:
Funny cuz all the foreigners I know say Americans are some of the most polite people.
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The difference between more advanced places and shame-based cultures is more impersonal prosociality (basically, we treat strangers better in a variety of ways).
 
ICHEERTHEBULL said:
I want to agree with you, it’s the right thing to do but there are so many people that should feel shame. I do think a major problem these days is complete lack of empathy
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Shame is important and empathy is important. We are lacking both in todays society. We all simply DGAF about each other either way.
 
The shame vs. guilt thing is an underrated driver of left/right views, with the left being associated with more guilt (and generally with being more extreme in adopting developed-world norms) and the right being associated with more shame (and generally having more developing-world norms).
 
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