Do you have a friend who isn't a good person?

VinceArch

VinceArch

I am all of me.
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I was hanging out with a buddy who disclosed some info about his personal life. He has a girlfriend and has fraternal twins with her, they've been together for 12 years and aside from her liking wine a bit too much IMO, they seem pretty happy. Like any relationship, it isn't perfect and they've had breaks from each other as long as 3 months from time to time. I believe the last one was the summer of 2022 so it's been some time. When we were leaving to do some work, his girlfriends younger sister was hanging out and when we were in the truck he asked me what I thought of the younger sister. I said I thought she was cute and he revealed to me that they fucked around several years back, not only that but that he also slept with their mother when she was visiting but this was when they had their last break in 2022 and that he also banged his girlfriends daughter who she had in a previous relationship when she was in her teens! I asked him why is he telling me this, and he was kind of taken aback, saying he was hoping to get props because he checked off a whole family. I told him he has but I don't know if it's something to actually be proud of, but I have no intention of telling his girl about this, I'll let him ruin his relationship but what a awkward time around the holidays that must be, especially since he knows and they don't. (I assume.) Now this guy has given me money in the past when I was falling behind on my mortgage and never asked for the money back. He's been a good friend to me but goddamn, he's engaged in some true dirtbag behavior. I figured I might as well tell the Sherbros and hear opinions or read similar stories if any have to share about a personal friend.
 
If you’re talking about people who impulsively decide to short term personal benefits while avoiding long term conflicts, yes. I know.

And it’s nothing out of the ordinary.
 
NadaRekowski said:
If you’re talking about people who impulsively decide to short term personal benefits while avoiding long term conflicts, yes. I know.

And it’s nothing out of the ordinary.
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Well I wasn't asking if it was lol.
 
Not really. If a person uses people like tools, or just like trash in general, best believe they would do the same to you if the opportunity presented itself. Not saying we are all angels, but a lack of guilt, or even giddiness when doing foul shit is a sign to me. Huge ass “caution” sign.
 
Satur9 said:
Not really. If a person uses people like tools, or just like trash in general, best believe they would do the same to you if the opportunity presented itself. Not saying we are all angels, but a lack of guilt, or even giddiness when doing foul shit is a sign to me. Huge ass “caution” sign.
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Yeah it's definitely got me trusting him as far as I can see him now. Part of me wants to believe he's embellishing all this but I'm not doing too good of a job believing it.
 
Fla graplr said:
Im kind of doing the math in my head of the ages and concept of banging the mother and the child of the gf?

He is lying or this story is made up
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The daughter is 20, the mom is 35. She had her young but that's all I know.
 
VinceArch said:
Yeah it's definitely got me trusting him as far as I can see him now. Part of me wants to believe he's embellishing all this but I'm not doing too good of a job believing it.
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Here is the thing for me. Unless it came off as a joke, and obvious hyperbole to get you to laugh or something, it doesn't really matter. At least to me. He WANTS to be perceived that way, which tells me he would absolutely do those things if given the chance. That is not really my type of person overall. Maybe too harsh of him, but that is grimy behaviour that would "leak" out into other areas of his life.

When I was younger, I would overlook that sort of thing. Or even partake in it... I understand the damage certain behaviour does to others now. Makes it harder to overlook that sort of stuff. Still, I am outside looking in. Maybe it was all just a joke. IDK
 
No, but in 2022 a close, old friend outed himself as a secret scumbag who'd been hiding in plain sight. We all cut him loose at the same time, every single of us (his oldest friends) blanket-disconnected from him and haven't even spoken to him since.
 
Satur9 said:
Here is the thing for me. Unless it came off as a joke, and obvious hyperbole to get you to laugh or something, it doesn't really matter. At least to me. He WANTS to be perceived that way, which tells me he would absolutely do those things if given the chance. That is not really my type of person overall. Maybe too harsh of him, but that is grimy behaviour that would "leak" out into other areas of his life.

When I was younger, I would overlook that sort of thing. Or even partake in it... I understand the damage certain behaviour does to others now. Makes it harder to overlook that sort of stuff. Still, I am outside looking in. Maybe it was all just a joke. IDK
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Yeah, I think he was kind of wanting 'props' which I was first thinking of giving when he said he got the younger sister but then I told him any family functions he's partaking with all them at the same time, is going to be super awkward. He said it usually is when the sister and daughter are with his family. I said better you than me.
 
I've had some but normally weed them out.

My ex-wife had a couple friends that I genuinely thought were narcissistic and evil. Glad I don't have to really associate with them anymore.
 
VinceArch said:
I was hanging out with a buddy who disclosed some info about his personal life. He has a girlfriend and has fraternal twins with her, they've been together for 12 years and aside from her liking wine a bit too much IMO, they seem pretty happy. Like any relationship, it isn't perfect and they've had breaks from each other as long as 3 months from time to time. I believe the last one was the summer of 2022 so it's been some time. When we were leaving to do some work, his girlfriends younger sister was hanging out and when we were in the truck he asked me what I thought of the younger sister. I said I thought she was cute and he revealed to me that they fucked around several years back, not only that but that he also slept with their mother when she was visiting but this was when they had their last break in 2022 and that he also banged his girlfriends daughter who she had in a previous relationship when she was in her teens! I asked him why is he telling me this, and he was kind of taken aback, saying he was hoping to get props because he checked off a whole family. I told him he has but I don't know if it's something to actually be proud of, but I have no intention of telling his girl about this, I'll let him ruin his relationship but what a awkward time around the holidays that must be, especially since he knows and they don't. (I assume.) Now this guy has given me money in the past when I was falling behind on my mortgage and never asked for the money back. He's been a good friend to me but goddamn, he's engaged in some true dirtbag behavior. I figured I might as well tell the Sherbros and hear opinions or read similar stories if any have to share about a personal friend.
Click to expand...

I have some that are rough around the edges, but the ones that are genuinely shit people I have cut out a long time ago, and will do the same again.

You have to keep your orbit relatively clean. I do not associate with trash, it will come back to bite you at some point.


I don't know, seems like a lot falls on the family here. Who the fuck fucks your daughter,sisters,whatevers BF... How old are these poeple?
 
My roommate as a freshman in college turned out to be a rapist, but that was 20 years ago, so no, no friends who are not good people.

My closest friend is one of the best people I know, and even saved my life. I tend to just drop people if I find out they suck
 
My best friend in high school had a baby when he was 17. He cheated on the mom/his wife constantly and eventually they divorced. The last one he cheated with, he married and they've been married for over 20 years now. I lost touch with him after about 5 years of that marriage but I know he was cheating on her too.

when I was fresh out of a relationship in my early 20s and really needed a place to stay, he let me live with him and his first wife and baby. So a great friend to me, but a scumbag. I lied to both his wives over the years to cover his behavior
 
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