Michelle Lopez
I couldn’t find her sherdog or UG thread. Sherdog needs a good archive. They too hastily delete legendary threads.
Seems she got over it and scrubbed what she could. I remember she had moved on to War Machine right before he got rolled up
Google search only had her turn up on an unrelated blogs comment section telling the whole story. Everything else, including the book seem to be gone
“Michelle Lopez
12 years ago
Oh, I am the queen of saying stupid things and regretting them later.
The biggest blunder of my life was me doing exactly that over a year ago. It ended up costing me big-time. I'll try to summarize what went down...
Long story short, I became fascinated with a professional mixed martial arts (MMA) fighter named Roger Huerta. His rags to riches childhood story touched my heart, and I felt like I could totally relate to him. He grew up with abusive/negligent parents who abandoned him and left him homeless by the time he was 12. He slept on rooftops, got recruited into gangs... but somehow he eventually became a famous and much-adored fighter in the UFC.
I spent about a year reading everything I could about this man and felt a profound "calling" to meet him. Meanwhile, I was a self-employed freelance writer living paycheck to paycheck, struggling to find my place in the world.
I wrote an intention in my notebook and decided to meet Roger Huerta in person. And what happened? A rare opportunity came up where I could meet him in his hometown of Pharr, TX -- a small town on the US/Mexican border, where he had grown up and spent much of his anguished childhood.
In July 2011, I flew from Colorado to Pharr in order to attend an MMA seminar being hosted by this fighter. I met him, got to hang out with him and his inner circle, and was amazed at how well we got along (as I suspected we would). He opened up to me...but our time was brief. The trip ended without resolution.
During that summer I grappled with my feelings about this man. I felt even more drawn to him. I wanted more of his time and attention. I learned he would be returning to Pharr for a professional fight in November 2011.
Once again, I knew deep down I had to do everything in my power to be there. I knew I needed to return to Pharr to watch Roger fight. My business was dwindling that year, income was lower than ever, and at this point I was running on funds from my retirement account. But I knew I HAD to be at that fight...
A few days before November 26th (fight day), I solicited donations online for gasoline money, pawned my gold rings, CDs, and other belongings, and came up with just enough cash to get myself to Pharr. I drove 1200 miles alone, without any sleep, in a Mazda that badly needed a tune-up and an oil change. Somehow I arrived safely, and all kinds of doors opened for me while I was there...
Roger lost the fight. I did not get a chance to see him. And I learned he would be leaving for Russia soon.
So on my drive back to Denver, I invited the fighter to meet me for dinner. He would be in Austin TX, and I would be passing through there on my way back home.
To my amazement, he agreed to meet me.
Running on very little sleep that weekend, I wasn't at the top of my "game." I was surprised to see Roger brought his family with him to our dinner.
Me being introverted, and tired, and seeing him act VERY immaturely around his family, and hearing news that he was getting married in 3 weeks -- I just couldn't take it. The reality of what I'd spent over a YEAR doing suddenly hit me.
I turned to Roger and said, "This was a stupid idea."
Then I got up and left.
.....
All that energy spent thinking about this man's story... going to extreme lengths to meet him... and creating a possible friendship with him... went down the drain because I was exhausted, stressed, felt out of place with his family, and I said something stupid.
The stupid words I will always regret slipped right out of my mouth, without me thinking, and I can never undo them.
The next day, the man I adored blocked me on Facebook/Twitter, had his friend call me and tell me "it's best if you guys don't communicate." They basically decided I was a crazy person, and shut me out. Roger was unreceptive to my apologies.
I decided to write a book about this whole ordeal -- partly to figure out what the fuck I was thinking when I walked out -- and partly to make amends.
I began marketing the book long before it was finished, and the mixed martial arts community got wind of it. It grew into quite a dramatic spectacle. (I am now known as the "Roger Huerta stalker" and due to my online marketing and SEO skills, my website comes up as #1 on Google when you search that term. But I digress.)
A year later, I'm still working on the book and still figuring out how to clean up the mess... it's getting clearer and clearer each day. On the bright side, I've discovered my #1 non-negotiable for living the life I want is to ALWAYS GET 7-9 HOURS OF QUALITY SLEEP EVERY NIGHT, NO MATTER WHAT!!!
In fact, any major blunder in my life can be traced back to me not getting enough sleep, and being a cranky, impulsive biotch!
So Marie Forleo, when I read your blog "I Made a Mistake: What To Do When You've Said Something Stupid," I had to laugh... because I've totally been there, done that. To me, stupid words are the emotional equivalent of an oil spill over the ocean. Such tremendous damage can occur over such a small error, when you're not careful with the words you give to others.
I thank you for this blog and I'm glad I discovered you. I hope someone gets something positive out of reading my story... I know it's an odd one. And I know it will be in book stores soon.
Michelle Lopez”
