PWD 495: Jinder Hates The Karate Kid and Paige Returns To Give A Fresh Supply Of Hard Wood

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J Danger said:
My day just took a hard left out of nowhere

No eggs in my house so I said fuck it I’m ordering Chinese

It shows up I open up my door and my giant dog Of course is right there

I have like a fucking metal screen door or some shit I don’t know what it’s made out of but it’s sturdy as fuck

Anyway he just pushes it open with his face and BAM. He’s in the guys shit immediately. The door wasn’t fucking shut all the way (Thanks gf).

The Little Chinaman is backing up so my hundred pound lab is all over him and jumps up and hits him in the chest with both front paws against the side of my house and is sniffing his face and shit. Retarded gentle giant.

Anyway I yell at the dog and get him inside, slam the screen door, and apologize to the chinaman. He’s pissed and just wants to leave. Alright man whatever, I get it.

I turn to go inside with my food and the fucking door is locked. My phone is inside. I’m barefoot. The chinaman is gone.

Everything is locked.

This is fucked.

I decide the door is my only chance besides breaking a window. I grab my leatherman out of my vehicle and create some separation between the frame and the door and eventually pry the screen door frame down far enough to have a chance at getting in.

This takes a long time because once again it’s a STURDY AS FUCK metal security door. Eventually I pry down the left corner.

I slide my arm down far enough to unlock the knob, scraping the shit out of it since I’m basically crushing it and the door immediately pops open and smashes me in the forehead due to the pressure of my arm being between the frame and the door

Now I’ve got a giant hematoma on my forehead watching masterchef and eating fucking General Tso’s and my dog has no idea why I’m so salty

This is how my first day back in California started

Fml
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American house security - you can get back home with a screwdriver while fucking your self up.

You'd need a locksmith and fifteen minutes of loud ass drilling to get into my home. If I didn't engage the second lock, then that would be about an hour.

Place took a bomb during the last war and is still standing.
 
Minotauro Rex said:
Old school Iron Chef is the shit.
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warriorscomeout said:
American house security - you can get back home with a screwdriver while fucking your self up.

You'd need a locksmith and fifteen minutes of loud ass drilling to get into my home. If I didn't engage the second lock, then that would be about an hour.

Place took a bomb during the last war and is still standing.
Click to expand...



American house security =

15MOSA50012G20CBGSPG_is


Take your head clean off, son!
 
warriorscomeout said:
American house security - you can get back home with a screwdriver while fucking your self up.

You'd need a locksmith and fifteen minutes of loud ass drilling to get into my home. If I didn't engage the second lock, then that would be about an hour.

Place took a bomb during the last war and is still standing.
Click to expand...

Yeah if someone breaks into my ass they are going to die from either a gunshot or Lucille.
 
Minotauro Rex said:
American house security =

15MOSA50012G20CBGSPG_is


Take your head clean off, son!
Click to expand...

That really gonna help you when the guy in the ski mask is already in your bedroom with his own shotgun. In the 15 mins it would take a fucker to get in my home the police are already around.
 
warriorscomeout said:
That really gonna help you when the guy in the ski mask is already in your bedroom with his own shotgun. In the 15 mins it would take a fucker to get in my home the police are already around.
Click to expand...

Dogs, alarm system and I'm paranoid, I wake up at every little sound. No one is sneaking up in here.
 
My kids are watching Wonder Years for the first time and god damn Paul is such a worthless turd.

Kevin can't do everything for you! BE A FUCKING MAN, PAUL!
 
Minotauro Rex said:
Dogs, alarm system and I'm paranoid, I wake up at every little sound. No one is sneaking up in here.
Click to expand...

Yeah well you don't sleep at all.

My meds have me sleeping better. I wake up at 7-8am and don't have to run and take an anxiety shit.
 
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