that's part of it but it's not the answer to why my resting heart rate is so high. I get nervous as hell when I'm in public.
I can't speak about your agoraphobia or whatever you have there, but I know with the 40+ lbs I've lost so far, my resting heart rate dropped about 10 points. My blood pressure was high enough I could feel my heart beat in my neck, head, legs, wherever. Fast forward 40 lbs, I sleep better, I'm calmer, more relaxed in just about any situation. Work is higher pressure, but my blood pressure is now in the normal range, and doesn't skyrocket all the time.
I know I'm not a doctor, but it doesn't take one to see that if I lost 40 lbs and that happened, you losing 100+ (or whatever takes you back to being healthy) will pay even more dividends. Yes, walking is a good start, but in spite of your weight, you're young, and given proper nutrition and exercise, that weight will fall off.
I think in spite of the annoyance people show with you in this thread, it's quite telling that they're still talking to you. They don't want you to die at 35-40 years old. They see that you conceptually like BJJ. The problem is that you're into MMA like people are into pro wrestling. You collect events, instructionals and the like, but that's just like saying reading about baseball makes you a better commentator. This might be true at the highest levels, but I'd guarantee they've thrown a ball around as well. Not everyone here will be a world champ BJJ practitioner, but most will agree that blue & purple is something that's well within the grasp of anyone. Getting to those levels will give you real world experience, and you'll see those instructionals come alive. You'll see minutiae in matches you'd never have known was there. But really, I'm sure you've got your mental hangups, but the problem is you talk your game from the sidelines when everyone's just saying to step onto the field. While a few might throw challenges down, I'm sure if you walk into your local BJJ school, nobody's gonna prove a point on you unless you decide to start running your mouth. Just show up, train, and learn. Anything beyond that is you just bullshitting and trolling.