Your finest hour...while intoxicated?

[Jermei]

I boned a fatty once.

Oh yeah, you said and I quote "It was like fucking a waterbed."

 

[Anung Un Rama]

Oh yeah, you said and I quote "It was like fucking a waterbed."

Lol! Great memory! Beautiful face tho. And I'm the fatty now so...karma

 

[Pugilistic]

I stopped banging a chick when she didn't want to anymore mid-sex. I was both drunk and high as fuck at the time (2nd time smoking ever) and it was when I realized weed improves my game a ton due to how confident I become. Took a girl home (first one night stand) and while fucking, she suddenly told me to stop because she was tired. I was close to finishing but I felt it would be rapey if I ignored her and kept going, so I stopped. She woke me up in the morning by jumping on my dick but did it again. Being the gentleman I am, I of course stopped. I thought it was really nice of me.

 

[MMAdict]

well there's clean and there's drunk clean

did you really clean it all up or did he notice something fishy later? i.e. smell or stains?

Hahaha no I cleaned it the morning after. I didn't wake up when I yaked so I discovered my present the next morning.

And actually I am a pretty damn meticulous cleaner so it was done well. I mustve wiped everything down like three times. Twice with soap and water and last with a mixture of detergent and water to eradicate the smell.

 

[Bobby Boulders]

This thread is the lulz. Please, keep em comin.

 

[Bobby Boulders]

i wish someone would give me free weed
Colorado must be so nice.,

Funny thing is, this was in 07. Weed wasn't legal there yet.

 

[HunterSdVa29]

once drunkenly told this annoying chick she was 'hefty like a trashbag' and ya, that wasn't the noble part. saw the same lady a year later and she look surprisingly healthier. like to think i served some small part in that. respect

 

[fightingrabbit]

Never happened. Unless you call throwing money away at strip clubs charitable. The last time I was fucked I threw up in a black cab and had to pay a

 

[Bobby Boulders]

I can't think of any, and I drink far too much

fuck

well I did make out with a fat chick once because she liked me and I felt bad.. but I was confused because this was five minutes after making out with an ugly chick, which ended abruptly because I suddenly puked during a brief pause

fuck

Don't feel bad dude. I made out with a seriously overweight chick once, bc I felt bad. She told me I could put it wherever I want. Then I thought there was probably bacon, and beef, and nachos "wherever I want." I went to the bathroom then snuck out.

 

[HunterSdVa29]

i also banged this chick once, relatively drunk, faded like an old tshirt status. anyhoo, her weave started falling out (A) she was white, and B) prior too, didn't know she had a weave.

Played it off, didn't mention it, and continued smashing outta the kindness of my heart.

 

[bobgeese]

Went to go get gas for a fire (because fires always need gasoline right???) for a party in the woods. So I proceed to pump gas into a beer bottle, while smoking a cigarette, holding it in the same hand as the bottle. When I finish a cop pulls up and was like wtf....

 

[Bebop]

everytime i end up with the fat chick when im drunk, i'm doing the world a service by taking one off the boards, at least for an hour

 

[Stargazer Rex]

everytime i end up with the fat chick when im drunk, i'm doing the world a service by taking one off the boards, at least for an hour