You should be able to grab a goose by the neck and show it who’s boss!

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by Merlotte's, Jan 12, 2020.

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Man vs Bird

  1. I’m in

    65.6%
  2. No way

    18.8%
  3. I’ll watch from a distance

    15.6%
  4. Nuke the ocean

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  1. Merlotte's Yellow Card Yellow Card

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    Ever had a run in with a goose? It’s like sitting next to Conor at a bar. Foul ass animals hiss and snap at you with their little beaks while waving their wings belligerently.

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    They may own the sky but this is OUR land. I say we take it back, and start with the Canadians!

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    Who’s with me?
     
  2. JabToucher Banned Banned

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    Don't try it with a swan!



    Geese seem easier to take on.
     
  3. JOE QUEEF Red Belt Platinum Member

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    I'd rather cut it's throat.

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  4. Estemachine Gold Belt

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    I would never let a goose punk me, the fucker would get chokeslam in a second.
     
  5. TheRash Purple Belt

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    I've killed hundreds of Geese in my life, mostly with a 12 gauge during hunting season.

    However, once I took my boy to a park in Dallas that had a bunch of resident Canadian Geese, and I figured it would be fun to feed them. Well my boy wanted to be the one throwing bread out, so once he did all the Geese in this colony immediately swarmed him. Mind it, he's 10, so I jump in and start ringing necks...I got bruised by wings, got bit a couple times, but I still managed to kill 2 geese with my bare hands. After the feathers settled I scooped up my boy and took off before the authorities could get there.

    I distinctly remember the first Goose charging me, head and neck erect with its wings out....I started to run...then I though "Its a fucking 10 pound Goose." I turned back and fought like it wanted me to. He lost.
     
  6. west42 Black Belt

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    I would teep kick those fuckers into next week.
     
  7. Merlotte's Yellow Card Yellow Card

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    We found our general!

    <RomeroSalute>
     
  8. Aegon Spengler Steel Belt

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    I do that before going out. If I don't wring my goose it will misbehave in public, start pointing rudely with its head, etc
     
  9. mooseman17 Red Belt

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    Since when can you not do this?
     
  10. Pliny Pete Puts Butts In Seats

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    A goose beat up my sister when we were little kids, she mighta been a toddler, and she was terrified of birds ever since
    I used to chase her through the house with bird feathers and she would scream in terror and run for her life<Lmaoo><Lmaoo>
     
  11. RetiredSlave Red Belt

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    If you eat them afterwards thats cool but just killing them when you can walk away is a little too... human. Ive always thought the world would be a much more interesting place with billions of eagles the size of buses.
     
  12. Possum Jenkins Great Replacement Belt

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    Be like



    Then go eat some

    [​IMG]

    just to rub it in
     
  13. badascan Silver Belt Platinum Member

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    Andy Milonakis style... slap a goose neck. I've been looked at sideways by a goose or two cause at times I'm around their nests but they know better...
     
  14. smooth assassin Black Belt

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    Ever since the geese melee in my neighborhood in the summer 97, I been waiting for them to slip up so I could give those assholes a payback like they wouldn’t believe
     
  15. Chesten_Hesten Sling'n Lead & Slapp'n Pussies, Ya Dig?

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    Never look a duck in the eye
    [​IMG]
     
  16. rj144 Gold Belt

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    I don't think the second one is real.
     
  17. rj144 Gold Belt

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    I used to live at a place with swans. They sometimes used to snap at random people, but they never once snapped at me and I use to get pretty close to them a lot to take pics. Maybe they can sense assholes.
     
  18. HOV Gold Belt

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    I thought this thread was about masterbation
     
  19. Thrawn33 JUST BLEED Belt

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    I've wrung a few goose necks
     
  20. Amerikuracana Life allows the illusion of relativity Banned

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    I hit one with my care AND IT LIVED.

    2015 Taurus limited. Ran it straight the fk over, looked in the rear view, and it was alive. I think I got the wing, but somehow it mostly ducked under the car. I did not go out of my way to hit it, and I would have had to swerve semi-dangerously to miss it. Was not happy or sad, just scared that it survived...
     

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