You should be able to grab a goose by the neck and show it who’s boss!

Ever had a run in with a goose? It’s like sitting next to Conor at a bar. Foul ass animals hiss and snap at you with their little beaks while waving their wings belligerently.



They may own the sky but this is OUR land. I say we take it back, and start with the Canadians!



Who’s with me?

 

Don't try it with a swan!



Geese seem easier to take on.

 

I'd rather cut it's throat.

 

I would never let a goose punk me, the fucker would get chokeslam in a second.

 

I've killed hundreds of Geese in my life, mostly with a 12 gauge during hunting season.

However, once I took my boy to a park in Dallas that had a bunch of resident Canadian Geese, and I figured it would be fun to feed them. Well my boy wanted to be the one throwing bread out, so once he did all the Geese in this colony immediately swarmed him. Mind it, he's 10, so I jump in and start ringing necks...I got bruised by wings, got bit a couple times, but I still managed to kill 2 geese with my bare hands. After the feathers settled I scooped up my boy and took off before the authorities could get there.

I distinctly remember the first Goose charging me, head and neck erect with its wings out....I started to run...then I though "Its a fucking 10 pound Goose." I turned back and fought like it wanted me to. He lost.

 

I would teep kick those fuckers into next week.

 

We found our general!

 

I do that before going out. If I don't wring my goose it will misbehave in public, start pointing rudely with its head, etc

 

Since when can you not do this?

 

A goose beat up my sister when we were little kids, she mighta been a toddler, and she was terrified of birds ever since
I used to chase her through the house with bird feathers and she would scream in terror and run for her life

 

If you eat them afterwards thats cool but just killing them when you can walk away is a little too... human. Ive always thought the world would be a much more interesting place with billions of eagles the size of buses.

 

Be like



Then go eat some



just to rub it in

 

Andy Milonakis style... slap a goose neck. I've been looked at sideways by a goose or two cause at times I'm around their nests but they know better...

 

Ever since the geese melee in my neighborhood in the summer 97, I been waiting for them to slip up so I could give those assholes a payback like they wouldn’t believe

 

Never look a duck in the eye

 

I don't think the second one is real.

 

I used to live at a place with swans. They sometimes used to snap at random people, but they never once snapped at me and I use to get pretty close to them a lot to take pics. Maybe they can sense assholes.

 

I thought this thread was about masterbation

 

I've wrung a few goose necks

 

I hit one with my care AND IT LIVED.

2015 Taurus limited. Ran it straight the fk over, looked in the rear view, and it was alive. I think I got the wing, but somehow it mostly ducked under the car. I did not go out of my way to hit it, and I would have had to swerve semi-dangerously to miss it. Was not happy or sad, just scared that it survived...