you fight that UFC shit?

[JCarlitz]

I just started training a month ago got addicted right away. I went in to speak to one instructor for advanced handcuffing defensive tactics tecniques and by weeks end was enrolled in Karate, Judo, Jujitsu, Muay Thai, JKD, Savate, Kali, Western Boxing. I still havent remembered to bring to cuffs into class always leave them in the car.

As far as the "So you do the UFC stuff?" I have not been asked that. But the "So you think you can kick my ass?" line. I hear that anytime I have my police uniform on. I normally shrug it off (normaly teenage boys or drunk men) damn I hate beer tents....

Your school teaches all of those things? And legitimately? A legit BJJ guy? And each has dedicated classes? Like this time is a BJJ class and this time is Western boxing? Not, like, each class contains the best elements of these 18 different MA's to make a super MA? Wow. Is this common?

 

[MAGIC HATE BALL]

I heard my wife telling the neighbor, "he takes KARATE class on Saturdays..." and I just cringe but keep my mouth shut. So days later, the neighbor's kid sees me get out the truck with a rattan stick and gives me the evil eye.

Also, I work in a state mental psychiatric center and I don't want people knowing that I know "something". It does NOT pay to advertise your capabilities.

 

[symphonyx547**]

its a huge joke in my gym now. we say it everytime a new guy with a tapout shirt comes in

 

[Grassshoppa]

I say, "Actually no, I pay people to smash me and basically beat me up. Sounds fun huh?"

 

[cgracie14]

its a huge joke in my gym now. we say it everytime a new guy with a tapout shirt comes in

i do not even own a tap out shirt but i thinks it hilarious when the same ppl around campus that ask me if i do ufc are wearing tapout... next time someone asks i'll say
no i don't do that ufc, i do that tapout shit...

 

[juji gatame**]

Mcdojo martial arts should just die IMO.

 

[grungephreak]

I just stair at the cuffs untill the crook has them on...works like a champ

lol I'll give that a shot and see where that gets me

 

[grungephreak]

Your school teaches all of those things? And legitimately? A legit BJJ guy? And each has dedicated classes? Like this time is a BJJ class and this time is Western boxing? Not, like, each class contains the best elements of these 18 different MA's to make a super MA? Wow. Is this common?

Yes, we have 3 main instructors that each have their thing and more people that come in from elsewhere in the state and we grab what ever from each class. You take what you like and then roll it together into your personal blend of JKD. When I started I thought I was going to be mostly boxing as a base. I discovered quickly I like Muay Thai. So then I started taking Kali to help me with my boxing (for the footwork and angles) Kali is sweet to if you want to learn striking it translates really well. I still suck but I just started doing all this stuff. Before that I just wore a tapout shirt and/or hoddie while watching UFC. Then the deputy that taught my defensive tactics class suggested a gym and a instructor. The rest...well the rest is brusied ribs, a broken toe, and a busted lip.

If anyone is around Flint MI area there is a Knife seminar in Grand Blanc on saturday for only 25 bux. Kali and (spelling on this) Silat for a few hours swing knives and sticks is always fun. PM if anyone wants some info on that

 

[BIGthingsSON]

PARENT - little timmy has been doing karate lessons in the shopping centre after school since his 8th birthday last month. hes already a brown and a half belt.
ME - oh thats nice. (MENTAL NOTE: MUST TAP BROWN BELT ONCE IN LIFETIME) i uhhh guess it must be really good for his confidence...
PARENT - yeh. that and knowing he can defend himself against grown men makes me feel more secure... anyway, they'll be home from school any minute now, then we can leave.
ME - sure...
PARENT - so. didnt you say you did some kung fu? what belt are you now?
ME - actually its bjj, and im still a white belt.
PARENT - oh.. thats a shame...
ME - well actually, in bjj-*DING DONG*
PARENT - oh thats timmy, ill just open the door.
ME - (internal FFUUUUUUUUU. fully concealed) oh hi you must be timmy. i heard youre a little warrior. what have you been learning in karate lately.
TIMMY - to kill someone by stomping on their face.
ME - well i hope you didnt kill all your training partners testing it. wanna try it on me?
TIMMY - OKAY!
PARENT - now now timmy calm down. remember what sifu miyagi said about fighting outside the dojo. uncle amiro does kung fu too you know, but hes only a white belt.
TIMMY - lol
PARENT - ok im going to get changed now and then we're going. timmy why dont you play xbox for a bit until we are ready. (leaves)

ME - so...... do you think you could stomp on my face and kill me?
TIMMY - yeh. id only do it to a burglar though.
ME - yeh thought so. youre just a chatter, bruv.
TIMMY - what?
ME - you had to act like youre some big man in front of your mum. id kick the shit out of you, you little rat.
TIMMY - MUUUUUUUM
ME - (closes door) you know, we've got a little saying back home. if youre coming on: COME ON!
TIMMY *attacks me with bitch ass kiddy punches*
ME *sprawls on him like a hairy avalanche*
TIMMY *slams his face into the ground, starts crying*
ME *goes to take his back, but hes so small i cant get my freakin hooks in*
TIMMY *squirms out and starts stomping on my face*
PARENT - ok im ready- OMG TIMMY NOOOO *runs in breaks it up*
TIMMY - *runs away*
PARENT - im SOOOOOO sorry. are you ok? hes never done something like that unprovoked before.
ME - WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE KEN SHAMROCK? I WASNT OUT! THIS AINT BOXING, GIVE ME A STANDING 10 COUNT! I WASNT EVEN OUT!

At first i was like this is stupid , then I was like LOL.



LOL gifs coming later