YOU ALL HAVE PUSSY HANDS! v2.0

CarnalSalvation

Trying to make a Milankey
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Section 1: What makes a strong grip?

Grip is made up of three primary categories:
1. Crushing: This is the type of grip one normally thinks of. Shaking a hand, closing a gripper etc.
2. Pinching: Pinching strength is mainly reliant on the thumb. Imagine picking up a textbook by the binding, that
 
Continued:

I prefer to train grippers twice a week, some do less, some do more. If you’ve just starting, once a week is probably enough, but gradually work on doing more volume on your grippers. Here is an example of how I might structure a weeks worth of gripper work (only an outline):

Day One:
Singles on difficult Gripper
Overcrushes (hard)

Day Two:
Attempts at a really hard gripper
Overcrushes (easy)
Singles on difficult gripper (less work than previous day)

You could add in things like negatives etc. as your hands permit. Although you may find (as I have) that hard singles, and some grueling overcrushes will be plenty. Serious grippers aren’t toys, and they aren’t meant to be used while watching TV, while driving in the car etc. Remember, this is a workout, so treat it as one.

Part 5: Pinch

Pinching strength is the area I struggle with most. I have weak thumbs and that’s a ***** in my grip armor I’m working on. Pinching strength is easy to figure out how to train because, well, you pinch things. The simplest and most common type of pinching is “plate pinching” this is done by taking two plates (try 25's, if that’s too much then 2 10's) and turning them so that the numbers face each other. Smooth sides out. Then grasp the plates across the top, thumb on one side, fingers on the other, and lift. Pinching can be done a million different ways however. One handed or two handed, plates or blocks (either bought or homemade) all of varying widths. To add to the variation, you can do pinching with less than all your fingers. Pinching 2 25's with just your thumb/index is much harder than your whole hand. You can make a cheap pinch block(s) out of one or more lengths of 2X4. You would just have to nail them together and find a woodscrew/hook doo-hickey. You should also probably invest in a “loading pin” which is used to attach weight to things like pinch blocks. Try to vary the widths of pinching you do, although be careful of pinching items that are exceptionally wide, as Gripmeister John Brookefield warns that such lifting can easily strain ones thumb. I do my pinch training in one of two ways: Singles, or holds for time. I might begin a pinch workout by doing some one-handed plate pinches working up to a few singles at my max weight. I would then perform some timed holds either with plates or with a block. For you lighter guys, here’s something to aspire to: some men are capable of doing chin-ups while pinch gripping the rafters of their basement ceiling. One absolutely cannot neglect thumb strength (as I did for so long) if they wish to claim to have a pair of strong hands. Not only is pinching a feat of strength in it’s own right, but strong thumbs will carry over well to your thickbar lifting.

Part 6: Block Weights

I’m sure some of you are scratching your heads just reading the term block weight. A block weight is the end of a solid dumbbell. While traditionally block weights are the end of the round York dumbbells, the much more common and significantly less expensive hex head dumbbells work as well. Simply buy yourself a brand new hacksaw blade (More TPI=better) and get to work. Cut off both ends of the dumbbell as close to the “heads” as you can. These block weights are lifted in the same way as a pinch block. Overhand, thumb on one side, fingers on the other. I train on my blocks just like I do my pinching: singles, and timed holds. I currently only have two weights for my blocks 37.5 and 22.5. A workout might look like this:

37.5lb Block Deadlift
22.5 Block Holds (using just my index finger, or just my pinky ring fingers)

A cool trick imparted to me by my grip mentor Bob Lipinski, is to apply some athletic tape to one side of the block. This makes lifting it much easier, and allows for greater flexibility when training with block weights. For example, when I am too worn out to fully deadlift my 37.5lb block the proper way, I can do some index/middle finger lifts using the taped side etc. When training block weights, I especially like to focus on my pinkie/ring fingers because they are obviously the weakest Also, as pointed out to me by Clay Edgin (grip mutant) they are the furthest down the lever that is a gripper handle. To add some credibility (albeit by limited anecdotal evidence) to Clay’s ideas regarding the smaller fingers and grippers: I closed the #3 shortly after I began doing pinkie/ring finger holds with my smaller block.

Part 7: How to set up a grip routine

Just like with the training of the rest of the body, there are a million and one ways to train your hands. Some guys like to do a little bit of grip after every workout, others train their grip everyday, some devote special days to it, some don’t etc. As always, you must find what works best for you. The only important thing, is that you try to create a diverse grip program. One that encompasses a wide degree of exercises that address the different “types” of grip. Just starting off, you might want to take one day a week and one that day do some grippers, some pinching, a bit of thickbar work and call it good. That would probably suit a novice just fine. My personal grip plan is four days a week, two of which are dedicated totally to grip. The other two days are my days for grippers, which I train after my bench workouts. The other two days are split into two basic categories, thickbar, and pinch. Here is a basic outline of how my grip workouts look:

Day One:
Heavy Thickbar Work (Deadlifts, rack pulls etc. on 2-2.5" bar)
Lighter thickbar training (maybe some timed holds on the rolling thunder for example)
2" Dumbell Hammer Curls

Day Two:
One Handed Plate Pinches
Block Weights
2.5" Barbell Curls
Telegraph Key (a device used for strengthening the fingers/thumb individually)

Or something along those lines. Simple. Effective. I also add in some wrist roller stuff on other days, which seeing as how I use a 2" roller (and have built a 2.5" model) sort of counts as grip work.

Just like any other workout, grip workouts require recovery time. To help aid in this recovery, I advise using ben-wa balls AKA dexterity balls. You know, the metal balls that come in a fancy box that are really sex toys but they tell us dumb americans are for stress relief or some shit. These work well as active rest for the fingers/hands. Also, the run of the mill “stress balls” sold at supermarkets across the world are great for squeezing during downtime to help your mitts get back up to speed for your next workout.
 
It's a bit dated, because I wrote it when nobody on here really trained grip, but maybe some of ya'll can get something out of it, eh?
 
Reading over this makes me realize I need to incorporate grip training more often.
 
Haha. It censored ch ink.

Is this the "you have pussy hands" article Sonny was talking about? Either way, good stuff, Carnal.

I actually shared it with Sonny first to see if it was, I guess it's close, but not what he was thinking of. It is more about training, and less about belittling you for having pussy hands.
 
The original pussy hands was more an instructional rant pieced together by Carnal, but this is still just as good.
 
Good shit Hoss.



Pussy hands my ass!

*crushes styrofoam cup whist sitting in office cubicle*
 
Glad to see thickbar getting its spot in the limelight.
 
For fighters IMO, there is no better way to go than thickbar stuff and block weights.

Grabbing a wrist is pretty similar to a 2-2.5" bar, and a forearm is akin to a more open handed grip test like blockweights/blobs.
 
I bought a bunch of thickbar stuff. 2 and 2.5'' inch dumbells, made my own barbell one, and some specialized offset 2.5'' dumbell bars. Good stuff.
 
lol... I had a 2'' dumbell loaded up for my one arm snatching. One of my friends was over and he goes over and tries to lift it. When he fails to do it, he turns and says "That must be a two handed lift."
 
That's how "challenge dumbbells" like the Inch gained their notorious status. Plenty of dudes can pick up 172lbs with one hand. Put a short, thick ass handle on it, and oh shit!
 
I got into lifting after reading about the old timers, so thickbar was there from the get go. I still can't lift the inch, but in time...
 
I can't do it either. Thanks to my pussy thumbs I suck at it.

Strongman Brian Amundsen who recently placed top ten at LW Nat's is from my area, and he suggested doing thickbar catches. Load a 2" bar to 135 or whatever, let go, and grab it. I've done that with block weights and other things due to John Brookefields suggestions in The Mastery of Handstrength but for some reason doing it with thickbars never occured to me.
 
Yeah I do the plate flips and catches that Brookfield had in his book. I might try it with the thickbars, but I'm afraid of dropping them. Daddy loves his equipment.
 
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