Would you do this job for 5 million per year?

Discussion in 'Mayberry Lounge' started by WorldofWarcraft, Feb 10, 2016.

  1. WorldofWarcraft

    WorldofWarcraft Holy Paladin Banned

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    Someone knocks on your door.. you open it and in front of you stands a wizard. The wizard has on his hand a piece of paper and a pen. He offers you a proposition... a job paying 5 million US dollars per year for a minimum of 5 years. Tax free.

    The job is as pictured. You are a fruit seller in war torn Syria. Work will be 7 hours a day with 1 hour paid lunch break. It's a 9am to 5pm job, 40 hours a week. You get weekends off. At 9am, you will be instantly teleported safely to your job location, which is as pictured. There's a magical porta potty in behind the rubble where you can do your #1s and #2s. You cannot enter the porta potty if you don't need to go and it ejects you safely out soon after you're done doing your business.

    The contract states you have to work this job for 5 years selling fruit to whoever wants to buy.

    You are given 2 weeks paid vacation on the first year, 3 weeks on the 2nd year, and so on... You are allowed 10 sick days per year.

    You can take a laptop with you for when business is slow. You will have access to the internet and there's a comfy chair behind that fruit stand.

    [​IMG]

     
    Last edited: Feb 10, 2016
    Aegon Spengler likes this.
  2. JaneJanes

    JaneJanes Banned Banned

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    Would I be killed within the first week?
     
  3. KILL KILL

    KILL KILL Gold Belt

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    What part of Syria?
     
  4. Loiosh

    Loiosh Detective Platinum Member

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    Yes, in a heartbeat. It's only Syria.
     
  5. PRIDEWASBETTER

    PRIDEWASBETTER United We Stand Staff Member Senior Moderator

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  6. Flemmy Stardust

    Flemmy Stardust King of Lea

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    Theres no way I'm trusting a wizard, so i would turn it down.

    I also don't really want PTSD so that people can eat fruit.
     
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  7. D Train

    D Train Silver Belt

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    That is a very detailed proposal.
     
  8. WorldofWarcraft

    WorldofWarcraft Holy Paladin Banned

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    Right now, Aleppo.
     
  9. odog

    odog A cat trapped in a dog's body

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    Sure. Why not?
     
  10. Jkaylor

    Jkaylor Double Yellow Card Double Yellow Card

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    Yes, you should do it TS Good luck
     
  11. Mike

    Mike Apathetic Belt

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    Sigh. Yeah I'd do it fuck it.
     
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  12. KILL KILL

    KILL KILL Gold Belt

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    Aleppo is far better off for non Islamic white people like me, than just about anywhere else in the country.
     
  13. KILL KILL

    KILL KILL Gold Belt

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    I have a few questions;

    - Who is this wizard?
    - What does he have to gain from me selling fruit in a war torn country?
    - Who is supplying the fruit?
    - Where do the proceeds of sold fruit go?
    - why did the wizard choose me, a tall white, English speaking, non Islamic man for this sensitive fruit selling endeavor?
     
  14. WorldofWarcraft

    WorldofWarcraft Holy Paladin Banned

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  15. Primitivo

    Primitivo Third World Prince

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    Easy money, man. I'm always prepared. Some even say I'm too prepared.

    [​IMG]
     
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  16. MadSquabbles500

    MadSquabbles500 Steel Belt

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    I would do it. The job is a good cause. Those people need fruits.
     
  17. wlu29

    wlu29 Banned Banned

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  18. Gutter Chris

    Gutter Chris Chiropteran Enthusiast

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    Hell yea id be selling so much fruit that no one would have time for fighting
     
  19. Tee Dee Pee

    Tee Dee Pee Orange Belt

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    Yes, use some of the loot to pay for security detail for wherever I will be, pocket the rest.
     
  20. MadSquabbles500

    MadSquabbles500 Steel Belt

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    I would like to bring a juicer with me, a blender, a freezer and some alcohol too. I can make cocktails, fruit juices, and stuff.
     
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