When you realize you're not very talented

[Marlowe]

I started doing BJJ in January and I'm having a lot of fun. However, pretty quickly I realized that I don't have a great talent for grappling. I'm not completely hopeless, but I'm a slow learner, and most of the guys I spar with (even the ones who started at the same time as me) will dominate me. I'm getting pretty good at avoiding submissions and getting back to guard, but it's kind of depressing when you realize you don't have "what it takes". I guess my strengths lie elsewhere.

Don't get me wrong though, I still love it and I'm not going to quit, but I just wanted to know if anyone who has had similar experiences has anything to share.

 

[ItsOk2Tap]

i have good days where i have really good movement and do really well when rolling. but then i have days where i don't think i could even tie my own shoe. i think its normal to get frustrated.

 

[Equinox]

you have to remember that rome wasn't built in a day (so old/stereotypical). i've been grappling for two years there are days i am content with my skills, others i feel that these two years have been a waste...just a mind set really...i find it helps promote self growth

 

[judogido]

Aaaaah, I know EXACTLY where you are coming from.

Look at it from the perspective of an ability curve.

People with better strength, agility, co-ordination, balance etc will have a big initial advantage. They automatically start higher up on the curve.

However, over time, this advantage is often eroded as skill and knowledge come into play.

All you need to do is persist and continue to learn.

There's more to success in BJJ than just simply natural ability - although for sure it helps. If they are stronger - you can be more determined. If they are more agile - you can be more dedicated. If they are fitter - you can be smarter.

If you can't be better than they are - train harder than they do.

 

[ItsArun]

I was one of the slowest learners in my class, and it took me like 6-8 months to get a secure submission on a fellow student. Not being physically "gifted", I had to rely solely on technique. It pays off, though it's an uphill battle. And you never stop working on your technique...you'll never get satisfied with your game, but trust me- it will pay off.

 

[jiujitsuking]

Can't say I have ever felt like that.

 

[judogido]

A classic case - there are 2 brothers, non-identical twins.

They started at the same time, and one brother was just more co-ordinated than the other and generally always won and placed higher than the other.

Yet, the second brother was just determined. He trained hard and had a never-give-up attitude, especially in competition.

He's now a nationally ranked player, and has defeated his brother on numerous occasions and consistently places ahead of his brother.


All I can say is - don't give up. Persist. Understand that just because they started better than you doesn't mean you won't finish better than they will.

 

[jjwvic]

A classic case - there are 2 brothers, non-identical twins.

They started at the same time, and one brother was just more co-ordinated than the other and generally always won and placed higher than the other.

Yet, the second brother was just determined. He trained hard and had a never-give-up attitude, especially in competition.

He's now a nationally ranked player, and has defeated his brother on numerous occasions and consistently places ahead of his brother.


All I can say is - don't give up. Persist. Understand that just because they started better than you doesn't mean you won't finish better than they will.

who are the two brothers you are talking about? or is it just an example to prove your point that hard work eventually prevails?

 

[mackz]

A classic case - there are 2 brothers, non-identical twins.

They started at the same time, and one brother was just more co-ordinated than the other and generally always won and placed higher than the other.

Yet, the second brother was just determined. He trained hard and had a never-give-up attitude, especially in competition.

He's now a nationally ranked player, and has defeated his brother on numerous occasions and consistently places ahead of his brother.


All I can say is - don't give up. Persist. Understand that just because they started better than you doesn't mean you won't finish better than they will.

well said.

 

[judofarmerbob]

practice more, work harder.

 

[BrokenCouch]

if al bundy can get a black belt at the age of like 65, then anyone can get a black belt. just a matter of patience, dedication and study (like anything else really).

 

[Bubble Boy]

I started doing BJJ in January and I'm having a lot of fun. However, pretty quickly I realized that I don't have a great talent for grappling. I'm not completely hopeless, but I'm a slow learner, and most of the guys I spar with (even the ones who started at the same time as me) will dominate me. I'm getting pretty good at avoiding submissions and getting back to guard, but it's kind of depressing when you realize you don't have "what it takes". I guess my strengths lie elsewhere.

Don't get me wrong though, I still love it and I'm not going to quit, but I just wanted to know if anyone who has had similar experiences has anything to share.

You'll figure out a your game eventually also. Just some little tricks and stuff. You can't suck at it ALL. You've got skillz just like everyone else. You'll find your strengths at some point, and you'll start capitalizing on them.

I don't have NATURAL grappling talent either, but I've been doing it for 8 years steadily. When it comes to Judo skills you might say I'm a jack of all trades, but master of none. I'm just kind of solid and well rounded but not exceptional.

You'll find your style soon, and be good with it.

 

[BJJ-guy]

who are these two brothers, or is your story like that fool who wrote Rich Dad, Poor Dad and never confirmed who the "two Fathers" were and made everyone doubt they even existed.

 

[devante]

if u as a non talented person put ur all into it, u will surpass alot of tech and phys better guys; but if the gifted guy also have the determination and dedication u won't catch or surpass them.

the only time hard work beats talent, is when the talented person is coasting on his talent; if he is just as focused he will be ahead.

y micheal jordan, micheal jackson kobe bryant justin timberlake/usher are so good at what they do, great natural talent; byt also have a work ethic superior to those competing. Other people had as much talent, but less focus and others had similar focus, just lacked talent; when u can put the two together u got something special.

 

[judogido]

who are the two brothers you are talking about? or is it just an example to prove your point that hard work eventually prevails?

No - real-life example.

2 competitive black-belt grades at my club.

 

[nyne]

believe in yourself. hard work and determination will yield improvement over time.

 

[The Colonel]

Dude...I realized that I wasn't as talented (whatever the hell that means) back when I first started grappling in '96. I was a bookworm, still am a bookworm, and before I started grappling I LITERALLY did no sports whatsoever and had zero athletic ability.

It got annoying sometimes to get beat by guys that picked the game up quicker than me, but overall what I've noticed with many of these people is that they oftentimes don't have an all around well rounded game. They are very good at one specific aspect that works for them and allows them to get the tap.

Take one guy I roll with who has wrestled for like, 25 years or something, the guy is a white belt in BJJ, but oftentimes he can tap me. How? If he ever passes my guard (and he's picked up passing amazingly quickly) he'll sit in side control and muscle my arm into a kimura-the dude is insanely strong, has weight on me and is phenomenal at pinning.

However, he can't:
Submit me with anything else from anywhere else
can't sweep me from any type of guard
can't get mounted on me or get my back
can't keep me from passing his guard
can't escape when I'm mounted
can't escape when I'm in side mount
can't escape when I have his back

And generally he just sticks to his very limited game because it works. It gets him the tap. He's a great guy but he just seems very unwilling to try new things when rolling. I'm already starting to be able to escape his pins now. It's just something I've noticed with a lot of the "talented" guys, is that the are very good at one thing and oftentimes won't venture out into other areas to fully flesh out their game.

But if it helps think of it like this; do you really think that Helio Gracie was talented? or look at someone like Jean-Jacques who was born with a disability? or skinny little Royler when compared to Rickson? They just worked and studied and trained more than the other guys. I really believe in what Pedro Sauer said at a seminar I went to. He said that "if you're not tapping you're not learning". So go ahead and tap, who cares, you're learning everytime you do it.

 

[jjwvic]

Dude...I realized that I wasn't as talented (whatever the hell that means) back when I first started grappling in '96. I was a bookworm, still am a bookworm, and before I started grappling I LITERALLY did no sports whatsoever and had zero athletic ability.

It got annoying sometimes to get beat by guys that picked the game up quicker than me, but overall what I've noticed with many of these people is that they oftentimes don't have an all around well rounded game. They are very good at one specific aspect that works for them and allows them to get the tap.

Take one guy I roll with who has wrestled for like, 25 years or something, the guy is a white belt in BJJ, but oftentimes he can tap me. How? If he ever passes my guard (and he's picked up passing amazingly quickly) he'll sit in side control and muscle my arm into a kimura-the dude is insanely strong, has weight on me and is phenomenal at pinning.

However, he can't:
Submit me with anything else from anywhere else
can't sweep me from any type of guard
can't get mounted on me or get my back
can't keep me from passing his guard
can't escape when I'm mounted
can't escape when I'm in side mount
can't escape when I have his back

And generally he just sticks to his very limited game because it works. It gets him the tap. He's a great guy but he just seems very unwilling to try new things when rolling. I'm already starting to be able to escape his pins now. It's just something I've noticed with a lot of the "talented" guys, is that the are very good at one thing and oftentimes won't venture out into other areas to fully flesh out their game.

But if it helps think of it like this; do you really think that Helio Gracie was talented? or look at someone like Jean-Jacques who was born with a disability? or skinny little Royler when compared to Rickson? They just worked and studied and trained more than the other guys. I really believe in what Pedro Sauer said at a seminar I went to. He said that "if you're not tapping you're not learning". So go ahead and tap, who cares, you're learning everytime you do it.

to me it sounds like he is stubborn and afraid to try different things..which have no correlation with talent level

 

[The Colonel]

What I'm getting at is that the guy IS very talented when it comes to grappling. He's wrestled for forever, is great at pinning, scrambles, and he has picked up passing very quickly, plus he's strong as hell. But he hasn't ever branched out into other areas of jiu-jitsu. He has tons of talent but just isn't willing to try different things.

A lot of the time it seems like talented guys aren't willing to try new things because they either lose position or get tapped.

 

[stlnl2]

I started doing BJJ in January and I'm having a lot of fun. However, pretty quickly I realized that I don't have a great talent for grappling. I'm not completely hopeless, but I'm a slow learner, and most of the guys I spar with (even the ones who started at the same time as me) will dominate me. I'm getting pretty good at avoiding submissions and getting back to guard, but it's kind of depressing when you realize you don't have "what it takes". I guess my strengths lie elsewhere.

Don't get me wrong though, I still love it and I'm not going to quit, but I just wanted to know if anyone who has had similar experiences has anything to share.

In my personal experience, it is still pretty early for you to make this decision. The "front runners" who dominate and power tap guys at the six month mark do not always make the progress the guys who are used to having it tough do. I would make this decision (lack of talent/ability) once you hit the year and a half or so mark (so long as you train consistently-3+ days a weeK) and your initial prognosis may change a hell fo alot.