What's your honest reaction to drilling or sparring with a woman?

[karma2burn]

This. My best partner for drilling and some positional rolling is a 120 female blue belt. Her technique is off the charts and she’s mean as hell. She’s been praised by demian for her abilities and she’s hard to sweep and will fight to the death for grips. I’ll take her over some 20 something dude trying to win adcc when we roll and spazzes.

I had to check to see if you were in my area. We have a blue belt woman that size and fits that exact description. If we weighed the same she would probably smoke me. I actually love rolling with her as I can try to be technical while minmizing using my strength\weight advantage.

 

[jr jr]

Yeah... I didn't read your post as saying you were female, but that other poster had me confused. Hey, at least you still have your speed. That's supposed to be the first to go as you age. I'm not looking forward to it.

Speed stays for a while. Recovery time was the first noticeable issue for me. Then it was stamina. Stamina, is a direct correlation to my recovery being more difficult.

All that said, age brings craftiness so its not all negative.

 

[shunyata]

-If she's experienced and capable?
-If she's less experienced but not a total spaz?
-If she's smaller than you?
-If she's a total newb spaz?


Anecdotes welcome. I'm curious.

I've sparred with women in kickboxing and grappling and most of them just like most of the guys were totally cool. Yeah if I outweigh them I'm flow rolling and flow sparring but I'll still match whatever they bring just like I would with a lighter guy.

Only woman I've ever rolled my eyes at was quite tall, close to my height, and a black belt.

I asked if she'd like to roll during rolls when partners for either of us had run out.

She talks about how she normally doesn't roll with guys because their egos are too big.

She frequently rolls with a much smaller (lighter and shorter than her) female practitioner who I've rolled with many times and had positive experiences, and I've received a great deal of positive feedback from her about not abusing my weight but giving her challenge too.

The taller heavier female takes top after I conceded it, and then she gets super upset because I grunted when bridging while I bridged and rolled her over. After the bridge and roll and she lost the tops, she quits the round early 20 seconds later and doesn't finish or restart with me ever again. She even states that to her, making a grunting noise while bridging = trying to hard = roll is over.

To be fair, I do not think the behaviour I rolled my eyes at had anything to do with her gender.

I've seen males do this as well, generally higher belts, slightly lower weight class (usually 155-170) and usually over 40. They get a particularly kind of anxiety about injury and a superiority complex about their technique that isn't strong enough to handle a middle weight in their 30s.

Meanwhile I've had plenty of male and female judoka, over 50 years old, 130-145 lbs, tell me to go harder and don't hold back and they bring it when you do.

 

[andrewm2211]

^thats just lame by any standard. She’s a backbelt and can’t handle someone escaping too hard from being mounted?

I mean it’s be one thing to be like ‘hey let’s keep a relaxed pace’ but to refuse to continue the roll like that is pretty whack

 

[j123]

real answer

I might be called sexist, but I don't like it. Sparring I mean with strikes and all that. Rolling I don't mind. Rolling, I treat it like I'm rolling with a dude in a lower weight class and chill on the power, focus more on technique. Haven't had problems, sure I get tapped by the more exp'd grappler, and I'm okay with it.

Only 2 women I've sparred with I've enjoyed, the others it didn't go so well. My first exp with this was a less exp'd striker, and I do have the edge as I'm overall a striker. So I don't throw hard, but I do throw in volume as I'm a combination striker, and she was clearly shutting down. So I dial it back, and focus on other things like counter strikes or defense, this chick of nowhere starts banging. So I get pissed because she's obv throwing bombs when I'm cooling it off, and I revert back to my usual offense, but a bit spicer. And it repeats. She also wore cheap shitty MMA gloves, so every strike she landed ended up scratching me. Its not a specific person thing too, most of them I sparred with was like this. They're spazzy as fuck.

The 2 I enjoyed sparring were pros, so maybe its because they're exp'd so it was good.

 

[Badger67]

real answer

I might be called sexist, but I don't like it. Sparring I mean with strikes and all that. Rolling I don't mind. Rolling, I treat it like I'm rolling with a dude in a lower weight class and chill on the power, focus more on technique. Haven't had problems, sure I get tapped by the more exp'd grappler, and I'm okay with it.

Only 2 women I've sparred with I've enjoyed, the others it didn't go so well. My first exp with this was a less exp'd striker, and I do have the edge as I'm overall a striker. So I don't throw hard, but I do throw in volume as I'm a combination striker, and she was clearly shutting down. So I dial it back, and focus on other things like counter strikes or defense, this chick of nowhere starts banging. So I get pissed because she's obv throwing bombs when I'm cooling it off, and I revert back to my usual offense, but a bit spicer. And it repeats. She also wore cheap shitty MMA gloves, so every strike she landed ended up scratching me. Its not a specific person thing too, most of them I sparred with was like this. They're spazzy as fuck.

The 2 I enjoyed sparring were pros, so maybe its because they're exp'd so it was good.

I've noticed similar at my club and in coaching wrestling. Women tend to be spazoid emotional head hunters. This is why their technique often looks sloppy like RR. The really talented ones don't, and i love working with them, but it's not the norm.

 

[TonyG304]

Even as a small guy, I try to avoid it. The women at my school aren’t very good and they go all out. If I have to work with them, I just go through the motions and transition a lot. It just feels awkward to me. Don’t get me wrong, I know there are women out there who are super tough, I just haven’t ran into any yet. If the chics at my school didn’t act like it was a real fight it wouldn’t be near as bad. Lol

 

[randomg1t]

if i'm trying to get some hard work done, i don't like it. but i'm getting older now, so i'm probably done with the really hardcore sessions, i mostly don't mind rolling with girls.

it does throw me off in the sense that i'm much more self-aware about where i put my hands. you don't realise how much ass you're grabbing during a roll until you have a go with one of the girls and consciously try not to do it.

 

[Snolla]

I'm a misogynist full of toxic masculinity so I typically crush them and sub them.
Ironically they get better faster that way

 

[j123]

Even as a small guy, I try to avoid it. The women at my school aren’t very good and they go all out. If I have to work with them, I just go through the motions and transition a lot. It just feels awkward to me. Don’t get me wrong, I know there are women out there who are super tough, I just haven’t ran into any yet. If the chics at my school didn’t act like it was a real fight it wouldn’t be near as bad. Lol

Let them bang

 

[4daLuLZ]

-If she's experienced and capable?
-If she's less experienced but not a total spaz?
-If she's smaller than you?
-If she's a total newb spaz?


Anecdotes welcome. I'm curious.

For some reason, the number of triangle chokes and guards I'm caught in is directly related to their hotness quotient.

 

[j123]

For some reason, the number of triangle chokes and guards I'm caught in is directly related to their hotness quotient.

If you get belly down armbar'd properly, you tap out by tapping ass in colorful spats

 

[4daLuLZ]

If you get belly down armbar'd properly, you tap out by tapping ass in colorful spats

oh that's what they're trying to do ?
Sheeeeit.........I thought they was trying to dry hump my elbow.

Kept telling my chiropractor that my elbow roblems are due to (quote) extreme sexiness of patient (unquote).
Well, what'd ya know .......maybe I should stop the unannounced surprise midnight visit to her house, I had planned.

That could've been embarrassing !

 

[colegargano]

You have to treat it like rolling with anyone else, just with more focus on technique instead of strength. I've been rolling consistently with one girl who's 20 years old and probably weighs about 110 lbs. I'm about 155 and strong. If I wanted to, I could just go ahead and man handle her, pressure her down, and brute force subs. But, that doesn't benefit me at all. You have to look at it as an opportunity to drill more fluid technique. Save the brute force for big men.

 

[TeamKenpo]

As a bigger guy (6’0”, 195 lbs) I rarely get paired with the women in the gym to drill or roll. However, when I do, I try not to use my size or strength at all. I try to test my technique and set ups from bottom positions and consciously don’t allow myself to muscle out of anything. Honestly, not really different than when I’m paired with a much smaller man, or when I’m paired with a much less experienced partner (I’m a brown belt with 7+ years grappling experience).

 

[RemyR]

I must sound like a broken record by now I can’t believe people that actually train make threads like this.

If anything I feel proud that my instructor trusts me to get a good roll in without hurting someone smaller than me.

 

[Hatake88]

I honestly feel..that the men on sherdog overreact on all topics relating to women.

I mean, its really not rocket science. If they are smaller than you and similar/lower in skill level, go a little bit lighter. Experiment a bit more with your technique. If they are bigger than you/higher ranked, then you can go a bit harder. If you tap her, that's fine. If you get tapped, its cool too. I really don't get what these weird questions are about lol.

 

[2008]

I honestly feel..that the men on sherdog overreact on all topics relating to women.

I mean, its really not rocket science. If they are smaller than you and similar/lower in skill level, go a little bit lighter. Experiment a bit more with your technique. If they are bigger than you/higher ranked, then you can go a bit harder. If you tap her, that's fine. If you get tapped, its cool too. I really don't get what these weird questions are about lol.

This is how I feel. I didn't bother adding my thoughts because I think this thread is really just girl bashing.

Once you get over your rolling with a girl phase, she's just another bjj grappler learning/practicing the art just like you.

 

[BIGthingsSON]

When I roll with chickens I just play a super lightweight game. Lottsa bolos and lapel trickery. On top, all leg drags and deflection passing.

I make sure I keep the pace superrrr high though. Ive had a few give me angry looks, but im here to train; not make friends.